Episode: 563
Title: HPR0563: Hack Radio Live 5
Source: https://hub.hackerpublicradio.org/ccdn.php?filename=/eps/hpr0563/hpr0563.mp3
Transcribed: 2025-10-07 23:10:27

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This train is...
...inbound.
I'm from...
...Septice.
My crime is that of outsmarting you.
If you have not yet submitted your identity to the Retinal Clearance System...
...communications interface online.
You're not dealing with AT&T.
Automatic medical systems engaged.
Welcome to the Internet, my friend.
How can I help you?
Defensive weapon selection system activated.
Has a very safe day.
Okay, from San Diego, California.
I'm Draconilus.
And from Sunny, Florida.
I'm Enigma.
You always sound so sad.
I am sad.
Why are you sad?
Because it's a Sunday night.
I mean, I know you're sad.
But I mean, why are you sad?
Oh, that's harsh.
That's harsh.
Because I have to go to the work in the morning and, you know, work stuff.
Yeah.
Well, this is our fifth show.
So what I was thinking was that every five or so shows...
...we would take a break from doing a topic...
...and just discuss things that are interesting and see where it goes.
So this is the test pilot.
If you were looking for a super focused laser type show...
...this one probably isn't the one for you.
Feel free to skip it.
Everyone else who just likes really interesting conversation...
...from really intelligent pillars of the community.
Feel free to stay.
I just couldn't keep a straight face on that one.
I know.
I was waiting for you to laugh.
I'm like, why is it mumble working?
I kept trying to go like more and more off the deep end.
You were about to be the president of a small nation.
You kept quiet too long.
Pillars of the community, huh?
That's not bad.
How are things going?
How's your job working out for you?
Not bad.
It's been busy lately.
But I've been working a lot.
Not SSRS software that I mentioned a few weeks ago.
It's not bad.
Oh, the thing with the thing?
With the thing with the thing.
Yeah, the reporting stuff.
I'm doing a lot of reporting.
It's been interesting.
I broke it the other day.
Actually, I have a rant since we're not too...
Before you do.
What happens if you broke it?
How does every port go?
Well, today's your port is all the reports.
We're going to get it except for the one that I broke.
Do you have to itemize how many reports that are done?
No, no.
It's like a planning to plan picture in office space.
Well, no.
It's more of a...
It's more of a...
I don't know what the hell I'm doing a lot of times.
I go in there and play.
That joke's too easy.
Yeah, thanks.
Appreciate it.
Thank you for not taking the bait.
I appreciate it.
Anyway, so I'm going in there and playing around.
I thought I broke something because a board didn't work.
My boss calls me and says...
It turns out the computer wasn't even on a big inlet.
Why doesn't this report work?
I'm screwing around with it.
I realized that the database that we're accessing
for these reports is a third-party vendor.
I don't know if you've heard of a product called connect-wise PSA.
No, is it like a hosted database?
What do you mean it's a third-party?
Well, it's a third-party application that has a database on the back.
Oh, so it's not like SQL or MySQL or Oracle.
It's like this other thing.
Well, it's a SQL database, but it's a ticketing system.
So that sits on top of a SQL database.
So we, instead of running reports within the tool,
we have our SSRS instance pointed to the PSA back end of the SQL database.
Anyway, so in the last update that they did for this software,
they actually changed the table structure.
So two fields aren't there anymore that I was using to report on.
And they weren't insignificant fields by any means.
They were the detailed description of the ticket and the resolution of the ticket.
Wait, so that was left out or was it just renamed?
It was just renamed, but I have no idea where they renamed it.
And in their release notes, they don't mention anything like that.
Oh, it's about to make fun of you for not reading the release notes.
No, no, I read the release notes.
There's nothing in there.
So I'm like, what the hell?
And then my rant is that I can't even go and ask these people a question.
I have to be what they call a quote unquote PSA Admin to ask a question of them.
Well, I know if you're a PSA Admin.
Can't you just say that I'm a PSA Admin?
You didn't know this?
No, you have to take classes and then they give you, you know,
or the PSA rights or whatever.
Well, just lie and say you have that.
No, I haven't gone that far yet.
It was just on for you.
What you should just do is just send them a bill for you at the time you spent fixing that stupid thing
because they didn't have release notes in there.
Well, it took me two or three hours to figure out what the hell they did
because I'm looking at this report and it's broken.
I didn't design the report and then I had to read .NET code to figure it out.
Why did you buy something from a company that you can't call?
Because I didn't have a choice in this matter.
It was before my time.
So I inherited this.
So shut up.
Anyway.
I think what Obama says about the economy.
I inherited this.
The result, the result and result is that I ended up, you know,
wasting two or three hours of my valuable day to track down and figure out this report
and it turned out to be not my problem.
It's not BP's oil spill.
It's Tony Hayward's oil spill.
Exactly.
It's not my problem.
It's with the database.
Yeah.
Like my usual battles of dis space and fighting, you know, the lack of the dis space that we have.
Why don't you just buy more sands?
Because we're a small company and we have budgets and stuff.
I don't see how you can be such a small company with so much data.
I've seen photography companies that have less data with these like 40 megabyte raw files.
We have 90 gigabyte files.
Yeah.
That's unnecessary.
It is.
It really is.
Anyway.
And an Oracle space alone.
We've got like, you know, three or four terabytes in Oracle space.
But I digress.
So yeah, that's my other, the other half of my gig is, you know.
Is Oracle space like a software or like a web posted thing?
No.
We have an Oracle database with, uh, I was meaning the table space structure.
Yeah.
No, things with Oracle just throw me off.
It's just such a funny thing.
The way they name it, like Oracle world, come see the Oracle world.
You know, you win Oracle world.
Come on.
It's weird.
Like, well, because Oracle just tries to seem so hip in with it and they, they sell information management.
Yeah.
Well, the site's just like, it's like, well, we provide information knowledge.
It's like on the third day, God created Oracle.
That's what the site's like.
Well, there's other alternatives.
You can go pay, you know, that shit, ton of money for, uh, well, actually, Oracle is the most expensive.
So I can't say that.
That's right.
I can't bust on Microsoft there.
It's like, it's just kind of an unrelated thing, but it's a tangential relationship to this.
It's a really famous story that's actually not hypocrite.
I believe it actually happened where IBM met with Apple and, um, on the Apple campus one day.
And, uh, all the IBMers, who usually wear suits, it's the international business company, international business machines.
They all were, like, sneakers and, uh, turtle necks and such.
And all the Apple employees, like, oh, we're meeting with IBM, fuck.
They all dressed up in suits and ties, so they went out to meet each other.
And they were all dressed the opposite of their stereotype and just kind of looked at each other like, oh.
Huh.
And apparently no one ever mentioned it, but they were all aware of it for the rest of the day.
That's kind of like Oracle.
It's like, it's, it's an uninteresting company.
And they try so hard to be interesting.
Well, and they also, you know, rape people for, uh, you know, money for their, uh, um, their licenses.
Oracle space, Oracle in space.
Yeah.
Database of the future.
I meant, when I said Oracle space, I meant Oracle table spaces.
I know, but Oracle space sounds funny though.
I should recommend it as a product name.
They'd probably give me a stipend.
Like, oh, what a great product name Drake.
Thank you.
But yeah, no problem, Oracle.
Yeah.
And another thing to, to, to rant on, because I'm on a ranting mood.
You know, I, I just have issues with people or companies hiring these consultants that, you know, just don't give a shit.
And they, um, we have this, this Oracle consultant, because we do not have a DBA on staff.
I, I play one on TV, but I'm really not a DBA.
I play one in the office.
I play one in the office.
Um, you should get like a hard hat.
The UN has what says UN and just write like DBA on there.
Like a blue hard hat.
That's actually funny.
I'll get into a story of that, you know, hard hat.
But anyway, um, in a minute, but going back to my ran on, on consultants.
This guy, I've given him stuff a couple of times, like just basic Oracle things, like create a user, you know, create table spaces.
You know, simple, or he's a consultant, he runs his own little consulting firm.
Um, so any, you know, charges us.
You know, a lot of money to, but anyway, um, so I give him simple tasks.
And I have to go back to him, you know, more than once, I've had to go back to him where things have been wrong.
Like, you know, when you create a user, wouldn't you check, you know, wouldn't it be logical to check to see if that user can log in?
Yeah, I check permissions, because usually they're created incorrectly.
Yeah, or, you know, that the user can create a table, like if that's a requirement, that the, that the user, the Oracle user has to be able to create a table.
Wouldn't you think that would just create a user account and then put it in a group or anything or just the Oracle database thing not have groups.
Yeah, it has users in group.
Well, it has users and roles seem.
Oh, okay.
Same difference.
But anyway, um, yeah, this, this guy has, you know, burned me on more than one occasion.
And of course, usually when he burns me, it's like on a Sunday afternoon, like he'll, like I'll give him something on a Thursday or Friday.
And like Sunday afternoon, I finally get around the checking it.
And it's wrong.
And I'm like, oh, I just got, I got a, I need this nail and he's screwed me.
Well, see, that was my problem.
And I was a consultant.
I always cared too much.
And that was so stressful.
I should have just not cared and double-billed.
Hey, you could do that.
I should.
That's what I should have done.
Yeah.
It's just not in me.
Yeah, it's not in me either.
I, I do a consulting Linux admin side, um, side work.
And I just, it's not in me to just not give a shit.
So anyway, um, so back to my hardhead story.
Um, I'm story time today.
Um, so in the office, you know, I just recently got a promotion to a supervisor or production
supervisor, whatever.
Super rising.
Oh, thank you, Drake.
An operation supervisor.
Anyway, um, so I walk in the first day of that I was officially, you know, promoted.
And I see a paper hardhat, like a yellow paper hardhat on my desk.
And I welcome supervisor on the, on my cue ball.
Oh, that's nice.
And I'm like, you guys suck.
I thought it was kind of, I thought that was going on.
Oh, and they, and they changed my monitors out with old CRT monitors that we had lantern
on the office.
Oh, that's funny.
They took my, my two 20 inch flat screens, my dual screen monitors and replaced them with
two CRT 17 inch monitors.
And I was like, you guys really suck.
That's okay.
You're a supervisor.
You're not going to do any actual IT work anymore.
Yeah.
I'm just going to sit and do nothing.
So, you know, in my case, I definitely felt it when, you know, I moved from, you know,
the, the code and monkey.
Yeah.
There's a lot more stuff to clean.
You got a lot of plants.
I moved from a coding monkey to a supervisor.
I definitely did feel the transition where now I'm responsible for these people.
I actually have to give a shit.
Oh, you don't code.
You like to scripting?
Well, it's code.
If you did.
It's code.
Because if you did a coding, you know how much coding you'd be doing for the hack radio
live site?
A lot.
I know a little PHP.
I know enough to be dangerous.
Yes.
Oh, I know too.
Um, but.
If you're out there and you know PHP and you want to do it in your time to a worthy charity,
like us, um, send me some feedback on this side.
I can use some help with PHP.
Yeah.
I could use them help with PHP too if I get around to it.
Like I.
Oh, and if you're an iPhone genius and you want to make a billion million dollars,
it's a billion million.
It's more than the national deficit.
Send me an email because I have some great, really simple iPhone apps.
And I can't get ZEF to do it.
And I can't run X code on my machine because of the freaking version problem.
I'm sorry.
Yeah.
So I'm pretty upset about it.
Because they're really simple.
And I just haven't got around to being with them.
But you were saying.
I don't remember what I was saying.
But I was definitely feeling something about windows and cleaning them.
You know, one of these days somebody's going to actually believe you and I'm going to kick your ass.
Yeah.
But just from the standpoint of, you know, going from coding monkey, you know, and worrying about me to, you know,
a manager or supervisor role, you definitely, you know, it's definitely a transition.
You know, I spend probably 10 hours a week dealing with people, which I hate, but I'm not a big fan of people.
But I'm not a big fan of people, you know.
You know, every hacker says that.
I think they just mean they're not sociable.
Well, in mine.
I've yet to meet a human who legitimately doesn't like a company.
You're not a fan of people.
You know, how many people are listening to you right now?
Two.
See you're a people person.
Everyone here only has to have his audience.
Is it a nigma?
A people person?
Is that a?
Oh, I guess you're not.
I never mind.
Yes, see.
The audience has spoken.
Exactly.
To audience of what your stuff animal collection.
Actually, there was nothing back there.
I was thinking you had, you know, I was picturing stuffed animals in the background.
Or.
Oh, God, screensaver.
This is not the time.
The squirrel army.
Like on scrubs.
The score.
What?
The squirrel army.
Oh, you don't watch TV.
No, there's some kind of show with this.
Every time I talk to you, I was like, oh, haven't you seen the squirrel army?
Or what LLs doing this week about the screen bracelet or what R-pats is up to on LLin or something?
What?
Lindsay.
No, they call Lindsay Lohand LL.
What?
No.
I met the squirrel army from scrubs like a few seasons ago, like when I was actually on TV.
No.
Like the janitor had a squirrel army and he talked to them anyway.
So what have you been up to lately?
I've been talking too long.
Well, last week, I jail broke my iPhone, which would be insignificant, except that it was so easy.
There was actually, this is the way they, one of the ways they jail broke the first iPhone,
is you just go to a website, which happened to be like jailbreakme.com.
And there's like, I guess it's like an invalid JPEG or something.
Maybe it's probably a KPMG or TIFF, something with more rendering.
But it just, jail breaks the phone on it.
You go to the site, you hit this button.
And it's just so jail-breaking.
And then when it restarts, you have city again.
And then you can tell the packages.
It was really slick.
So, pardon my ignorance, but what does jail-breaking your iPhone give you the ability to do?
Oh, it breaks everything.
You know, Zef talked me into it.
He's like, oh, just jailbreak it.
It's going to make a wonderful world.
That's how Zef sounds.
So, I did this.
And like, half my stuff breaks.
And then I have to go through and get SMS working again and all kinds of crap.
And the only reason I wanted it was because I wanted this one application,
so that I can turn my iPhone into a Wi-Fi hotspot.
And in retrospect, I should have just paid for the tethering.
So, I only needed it next month.
And tetherings were just 20 bucks.
And the application was 10.
And it was not worthwhile.
But it gives you access to package management.
Oh.
Okay.
Yeah.
I'm not thrilled.
Not thrilled.
Okay.
I have a stock, you know, iPhone 3G.
So, for 3G asks, actually.
So.
The only time I ever need this, my friend, who we're just call Harvey.
Harvey's like, oh, no, man, you can...
I don't want to say he exaggerates.
He tells a bold face to lies through his teeth.
And he said one time, oh, no, man,
you can put the iPhone on Verizon.
You can't.
It's a GSM-only phone, so that's T-Mobile AT&T
and like, vote a phone and such overseas.
Wait, an iPhone is a CDMA network.
They're fundamentally different technologies,
different frequencies, different bands, everything.
And he goes, oh, no, no, no.
It's easy.
I've seen them do it.
And he talks me down.
It's like, gosh, that's really close.
You got to take the phone off.
You got to take out the chip.
And then you put this new chip on, and then boom.
And those were the instructions to get the iPhone to run on Verizon.
Like, no, you...
I'm honest, there's more play.
I'm like, no, you dumb bitch.
You dad doesn't...
How could that possibly work?
Was it the end of my road?
It was just like an obnoxious thing to say.
And he goes, no, no, I've seen it.
And you don't understand.
Harvey is very...
It's as if it actually happened
when even when he's telling lies.
And he's a nice, he's a super nice guy.
He's just incredible.
And I go, what do you mean you see?
He goes, yeah, my friend's phone said Verizon up on the top.
I'm like, oh, and very quickly in city.
I downloaded this application.
That you change the network moniker up in the left-hand corner.
You can make it say whatever you want.
So I made it say Harvey's big ass network.
I'm like, look, now it's on Harvey's big ass network.
Is that...
Did I put a chip in?
He's like, oh, well, he did it.
I'm like, what was the end of the conversation?
So that's all city is used good for.
It's making your friend Harvey look stupid.
And the other thing.
What do I think?
Oh, tethering?
Yeah, tethering.
Okay.
But just a bunch of obnoxious things to say.
Take the...
There's nothing more ignorant you could have said.
To take the chip out.
I guess I guess you referred to the AT&T chip.
And put in the Verizon chip.
Yeah, but, you know, as you said, they work on completely different frequencies.
Like, how could that...
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Possibly work.
Well, I know, but it's not like...
If you've ever seen a chip, they're very...
It's not like...
It's not even one chip.
There's firmware things and software things.
Yeah.
Oh, I have a short temper with things like that.
Well, I've seen them...
I've seen the iPhone be ported to...
The Verizon chip.
Oh, I've seen the iPhone be ported to another GSM network.
Oh, yeah.
I had my own T-Mobile for the entire time that I had it because the AT&T was really bad.
They're not that much bad.
Yeah.
But as long as you're growing GSM to GSM, you're fine.
Yeah.
There's no taking out...
So they're taking out the SIM card.
That's not just soldering a chip from the mainboard or rewriting terminal firmware.
Yeah, no.
No, that's not going to work out so well.
Anyway, then I've been working on making my car start with RFID.
Oh, cool.
Yeah, it's a lot more complicated than you think, because the idea is that an Arduino can...
You can essentially unplug a ribbon cable from the main ignition module and wire it to an Arduino.
And then theoretically, if I do my part right, I can make it start the car.
But it has to walk through all the key motions.
And the ignition module, I'm trying to rebuild it in a way that's controllable by the Arduino.
But it takes...
In the Arduino, I should add to say, it's a small development platform.
It's like 20 bucks and it's a programmable chip and you can make certain things happen with certain buttons.
It's very quiet.
I recommend getting them from SparkFun.com as a great place to buy these things.
But it's nothing like hot wiring a car in the movies.
Oh, my God.
There's like a thousand of these little resistors.
And I have to figure out, okay, when it's in this mode...
And there's this...
It's like a Tim Burton film.
Like how wacky it is inside of this thing.
And all these pieces move around and they make funny contacts with each other.
And you have to go through and trace back.
Okay, what is this doing in this mode?
It's so difficult.
But in the end, I hope it will be successful.
Yeah, one of these days, I really want to play with the Arduino.
Because, you know...
They were extremely fun.
I've seen droops and more Dylan gave a talk.
It's a freak neck, I believe.
Triumph droops is...
Is he that guy you refuse to talk to about the hacker media science?
Hey.
I wonder...
I'm touching my chin with my finger.
Why must you, you know, constantly...
Were you saying something about, you know, cleaning a window or something?
You're going to actually make these people believe I clean windows.
Well, you know, it's just that the only time I've ever jumped to your office,
I walked in like to bring you like lunch or I had to go and get up there.
You don't even know why I live, so...
Don't even say that I chew, too.
Oh, yeah.
And I said, where's a nigma?
They had everyone pointed like a nigma?
Oh, they pointed at the window.
They were out there swooging the window.
Yeah, yeah.
It was a summer day you were wearing a blue shirt.
You had a red tie with a noxious little dots on it.
Just stopped telling lies.
You know, I think I have pictures on my phone.
Hold on a second.
Yeah, no, you don't.
Track again.
But I was saying about the Arduino.
There was a talk.
I think they've given the last two years at Frequent, Frequent.
Yeah, which is a hacker con if people don't know in Nashville, Tennessee.
I think that's the one.
Yeah, that's the one in Nashville.
Yeah.
And it's in October.
It's the last week in October.
Can we have a hacker con?
We can have it in my backyard.
Well, we were actually thinking about having one in Orlando, but it never took off.
Oh, yeah.
Which was a really good idea, but anyway.
It wasn't thought it could idea.
It didn't take off because no one wanted to go.
No, we...
Who wouldn't want to come to Florida?
I don't want to go to Florida.
It's hot and sticky.
It's no more hot and sticky than Southern California.
You know, I read once that Florida was the worst place on the earth.
Is that true?
Man, it's not.
Are you going to have a particular wire?
I particularly like it here to be quite honest.
It was like the...
It's like, I don't know.
Fourth or fifth issue of Time Magazine just said Florida.
Bad or bad?
And I have, you know, experience because I'm on your coast, you know.
Quite a...
Yeah.
You don't like California?
Isn't Florida like 100 and something, though?
Yeah.
Well, it was...
It was hot this weekend, let's put it that way.
But I digress.
I was back to my hacker con.
You know, I...
I don't remember what I was saying other than they gave a talk about Orduinos that was really cool.
Anyway, I'll just leave it at that.
No, they're very quiet.
I've...
I use them for all kinds of parts.
So I actually...
I don't know if I burnt one up, but I just need to reflash the firmware.
Because I ran like three times too much power through, but...
And more yelling, you know, did some cool things with T-shirts and making them light up and...
With an Arduino?
Yes.
That's kind of bulky to fit into a T-shirt.
I...
I think he...
I don't know how to say it.
I guess he did around the collar, maybe.
I think he did it like a pocket like...
Like made a pocket for it on the inside of the shirt.
You know, I keep watching the statistics in mumble when we're doing that conversation.
And it has a speech probability.
It stops transming when I stop talking to save bandwidth.
And it never goes to 100%.
It's always 99.
It's never 100% sure that you're talking.
And that reminds me of...
I had this thing called a Fitbit.
It's a really cool thing.
It's like the size of a clothespin.
And you clip it somewhere on your body, you can be in your pocket, on a pant leg, on a collar of your shirt, whatever.
And it has a really, really precise accelerometer like a We-Mote.
And it's extremely good at calculating how many steps you took, how far you walked, your activity, how many calories you've burned.
So you can say like, oh, I actually spent all day just laughing around.
I should go for a walk or something.
And it wirelessly transmits back to a base.
And it goes for like a week or two without charging.
It's just very cool.
It's kind of like a pedometer.
It's like a pedometer only.
It works really well.
It was only a hundred bucks.
It doesn't need to be charged like more than twice a month.
And it wirelessly transmits back to your computer and makes this cool website with graphs.
And oh my god, I love graphs.
But what I was going to say was that if you wear it, it has a little bracelet that you can use.
If you wear it while you're sleeping, you will measure how much you move in your sleep and tell you how restful your sleep is.
And there was one time I forgot to turn it off of sleep mode.
And I gave it to my friend I was showing off how cool it was.
And they went jogging with it.
And they were out jogging.
And Fitbit thought I was asleep.
And that was the only time I've ever seen it say, I am a hundred percent certain that you do not have a restful night sleep when you're out jogging with it for an hour.
The rest of the time it's like, while your sleep was a 20 percent good here, 80 percent bad there.
This is the only time there have been no.
You had a bad night sleep.
It's like you were jogging or something.
Yeah.
It says bad things to me.
Bad, bad dream.
You're not going to feel what rest in the morning.
I call Fitbit like.
Oh, this show is going to, it's so good.
Our ratings are so good to go to hell.
Well, we'll put this show out.
And then there's five more shows until we just talk about things again.
And if people say they don't like it because they'll leave so many comments on the excellent hack radio live.org site, then we won't do it again.
Or they can leave it in the spam of the HBR site.
It's been a week since the last show and you still haven't fixed that?
I still haven't fixed it.
I've been playing my StarCraft 2.
All right.
But the thing about this show is that we can talk about things like the Arduino and the Fitbit that I can't have a whole show about the Fitbit.
But it's cool enough to mention.
It is.
So I'll mention my StarCraft 2 again.
Oh, come on.
Fitbit.
And the only reason I mentioned it is because I'm running it in Linux.
Under Wine.
On Wine?
Yeah.
And a couple of issues I have.
One, the installer doesn't work.
And I know I'm just bitching.
I'm just bitching because, you know, I know it's a Windows app and I know, you know, I know the reasons why we can't get decent games on Linux.
But I'm still bitching.
No.
So, you know, the installer doesn't work, which I can get around.
I installed on my laptop and then I, you know, copy the folder to my Linux box and it runs, you know, no problem.
But why do I have to monkey around with the wine settings so much to get it to even function?
And why does my framerate always drop to next than nothing?
Like, why are these things, you know, why?
Why?
Why?
I mean, I can get it.
Like, you know, I play World of Warcraft, all right?
Well, are you using like stock wine or...
I'm using stock wine.
I'm using stock wine.
Oh, try Crossover.
Crossover was great.
Yeah.
I just didn't really want to pay for Crossover.
You didn't get it when it was free?
Oh, yeah, I did get it when it was free.
Yeah, so you used Crossover.
Yeah.
I think I tried it and it was just...
I don't remember.
Well, you didn't try it with the StarCraft that just came out two weeks ago.
I did not.
Try it when it was free.
I'm telling you.
Anyway, so why do things, you know, why must it be so difficult for, you know, us to get decent games?
And why, you know, why can't bugs be fixed in a bunch of you know, just annoying me?
Do you want to know why I hate open office?
Why do you hate open office?
Oh, ignoring the fact that open office isn't good.
Like, if you actually, if you're a power user of the Microsoft Office suite, it's just not a comparable thing.
Like, the way it makes charts, just doesn't have certain features, it doesn't work in the suite.
But I went through my Linux phase where I just all exclusively wanted to use Linux.
So I tried open office.
The software, by the way, is called OpenOffice.org.
Not OpenOffice.
OpenOffice.org.
What other software, you don't use Chrome.com or Skype.com.
You use Skype or Chrome.
But my main problem is actually really more the community than anything else.
When you type in the word processor, it doesn't mute or at least it didn't.
It didn't mute the trackpad.
So when you're typing like your cursor bounced all over the screen, you go, why is that?
Because your palm crosses across the trackpad on your laptop.
And any other word processor or operating system will ignore the trackpad input
when you're typing.
It's a very fundamental thing.
And I made a, I did the good open source thing.
I contacted developers and said, hey, is this something I'm doing or is it not a problem?
And said, oh, it's not supported.
I went and I filed a bug report and said, oh, it's not a bug.
It's a feature thing.
I said, fine.
And this is over the course of like a week.
I said, fine.
I went and filed a feature thing.
My feature was like closed because they said it wasn't important.
So I went to the feature voting thing and said, you know, vote for my feature.
And at the time, I knew someone who was doing a podcast and said, hey, talk about this on your podcast.
And my feature got like a 300 votes and still some asshole developer said, oh, it's not important.
It gets very important.
So screw you open office.
Well, my own problem with open office is the Excel app just isn't anywhere.
It's called Calc for those who don't know is nowhere near what Microsoft Excel is.
That is.
Yeah, I know.
It only has rows.
Yeah, shut up.
No, no, it's actually really bad.
If you're a power user of the databases or spreadsheets, it's not so great.
Yeah.
We use, you know, at work Excel for a lot of our recording, like, we'll dump.
Like, we're all text files or CSV files out.
And then I'll pull them into Excel and, you know, do pivot charts, whatever, whatever.
We decide to make them look like.
And some of our products actually use Excel add-ins to generate reports.
And they automatically generate the report in the pivot chart and whatever.
Anyway, you can't do it in Calc.
And it just annoys me to know.
And don't get me wrong.
Open office is absolutely great.
It's the best thing ever.
It's better than anything I could have coded.
But for the love of God, how hard is it?
You know what someone told me about the trackpad thing?
They said, oh, well, you should buy a laptop that has a switch.
So you can turn off the trackpad.
You should buy a laptop with a switch.
So you can turn off the trackpad.
God, hell is that.
It wasn't even like, use a mouse.
It was buy a laptop with the trackpad switch.
I would have told you to use a mouse, but.
Yeah, I think you did.
I think I bitch about it.
I think I wanted you to vote on my thing.
Yeah, I don't think you voted for it.
I think you should use a mouse.
Maybe I did.
I don't know.
Yeah.
Going back to your wine thing, you know, a valve, the Half-Life
and Crossover company, which is a really awesome company, by the way.
You don't think I recently poured a Half-Life to Mac.
I don't know, but the link said, but Mac for sure.
Yeah, I saw that.
And they made a big deal about it, and it was a whole fiasco.
Because everyone was like, oh, but Mac is only 10% of the user base.
And it was this whole thing.
And all these blogs said for 10%.
And Valve ever hoped to offset the costs of the development.
And I was so shocked because Half-Life is, you know, barring crisis, which I've never played.
But the Half-Life engine is just incredibly powerful.
It's one of the most powerful gaming engines out there.
And it worked almost flawlessly under wine and Crossover.
In fact, it was one of the only games that worked amazingly well on the only game of that graphical such.
That worked amazingly well off to Crossover.
They should have just took Crossover and bottled it and like put that out as their port.
But they rewrote it for Mac, and it's just balled with my mind.
Well, another going into the whole wine crossover.
Another competitor is Sadega.
They also...
I thought it was that.
Is that Nikon?
It's okay.
I used it for a while for World of Warcraft.
But they're behind, I believe, at least one development cycle from the wine group.
So you don't get the latest and greatest wine.
So it does have its limitations.
The latest and greatest wine.
Yeah, that's...
On a side note, this is completely unrelated.
But you know howsparty.com?
No, I do not.
Okay, they were made famous because when Windows 7, hold on a second.
Oh, backfired completely.
Could you not, you know, drop your mic?
No, I just mentioned it.
Houseparty.com was famous because when the Windows 7 launch happened,
they made a big point of having a house party event on houseparty.com.
And what it is is house party is a company that helps other companies sponsor house parties.
So if your Windows, for example, when this happened, you go to house party and say,
I want more excitement for my product.
The house party says, great, we needed to lump some of money and a bunch of stuff.
And then house party organized people, screens, potential applicants,
and then they send stuff out so the applicants can host their own windows or whatever themed house parties.
It was a big deal back when Windows 7 launched.
But they had a rubber made clean little secrets mop party where a rubber made will send you a mop.
And I showed this to my friends out of disbelief and we were just talking about it.
And is that...
No, I probably shouldn't.
There's another show I do but I don't want to plug it.
But one of the questions was, because you have to fill out a survey before you get the free mop.
And one of the questions was, how often do you go to the cleaning aisle to look at the latest and greatest cleaning tools?
I don't know.
I don't know if anyone who goes to the cleaning aisle to look at the latest and greatest cleaning tools.
There's always so much advancements you can have in mop technology.
Yeah, I'll give you that.
But what did that have to do at all with what I was talking about?
Because you said latest and greatest.
Okay.
But the latest and greatest revision of said software product is what I was getting at.
Yeah, but it reminded me of the stupid mop.
I was not accepted to the rubber made mop cleaning house party, by the way.
I will not be having a free mop party.
I'm sorry.
But can we talk about something technical now?
Sure.
Okay.
I completely lost my train of thought.
But anyway...
I don't like the mop story.
It's just so ridiculous.
Like, you're going to invite your friends or a big man.
Scott, check out my new mop.
Oh, that's such a cool mop.
Sorry.
All right.
Well, you talk for a while because...
That's all I got.
It's been a long show.
I'm sure people have done with us.
If you have nothing to add, I'm done with the mop thing.
You're done with the mop thing.
Yeah, I had something else to say about, you know, wine and the whole...
It's a day of good...
bit, but I completely lost my train of thought.
You know, they call it the party.
The clean little secrets house party.
Okay.
I think we're just going to end the show on that now.
I think we're done.
I think we're done.
I think we're done.
See you next week, everybody.
Tuesday, go to the site, hackradiolive.org.
Look at the cool stuff.
If you want to send rubber made a letter and complain that I didn't get a free mop,
go ahead.
And we'll see you next week.
See you next week.
Okay, please do a talking when the science will do.
And I look up there.
It makes me glad I love you.
I'd experiment to learn your research to be done
on the people who are still alive.
