Episode: 779
Title: HPR0779: 10 Buck Review: War Games
Source: https://hub.hackerpublicradio.org/ccdn.php?filename=/eps/hpr0779/hpr0779.mp3
Transcribed: 2025-10-08 02:28:58

---

Welcome to syndicated Thursday on HPR, today we present ten book review.
That's what I'm now, yeah, yeah.
This is Kilroy 2.0 and when I'm not amassing my flock or helping off their JC Hutchins with seven sun descent at JC Hutchins.net,
I like to listen to ten book review.net to discover what's the best finds you can get for under ten bucks.
Welcome to ten book review where we sit down and review the best or the worst of movies you can find for under ten bucks.
I believe we've seen some of the worst. I'm your host, Lord Drakenblut, with me, we have of course the White Wolf and returning.
Nightchild. And now a new victim of the show.
It works and we have a classic today. A movie I haven't seen in about 15 to 20 years.
And the movie is now over, well it's over 25 years, it was released in 1983.
And we're talking about the all-time classic that introduced to a generation the concept,
do you want to play a game? The movie war games.
And since he's the new victim, I think we'll start off by letting him describe the cover art of the movie here.
I want to hold the mic a little bit closer.
Yes, light. We will get to that one.
So do I. Anywho.
Primitive. Come on. Come on Shadow Steps.
Dude, we got to know what the cover looks like. Let the public know. Yes darling, please let the public know.
Background, a lot of computer generated.
Should I take over? Yes.
We have a classic look of black background overlaid with obvious computer-aided graphics of ships and missiles and so on.
Basic 1980s US military world grid with possible nuclear missile destinations and paths and so on.
With the little biohazard signs here and everywhere.
Dead center, we have our two main characters set looking out like up at the sky.
And then just below that we have the United States of America, United Department of Defense of America,
SEAL with the two of them running along and at the very very bottom it says, is it a game or is it real?
Now the one thing you're leaving out on the top bar. Oh yes, the very top bar, very blue bar with the letters in silver, 25th anniversary edition.
Yes, and now we'll go back to Shadow Step here to see if he is capable of reading the description on the back.
All right, don't pick on him too much this is first. Try it this.
But we let him get to reading that will allow in a night child here to describe the back cover.
Pokemon game damn you. Yes, put away the track.
You have no idea my kids got me hooked up Pokemon and now I'm playing it incessantly.
Okay, Matthew Broderick everybody knows that name.
Bear's beavers day off and allie sheety the breakfast club really sad that that's what she's being known for.
Star in this compelling drama filled with action suspense and high tech adventures featuring superb performances by Dabney Coleman and Barry Corbin.
Wargames is brilliant funny and provocative New York fast-paced cyber thriller.
Computer hacker David Lightman Broderick can bypass the most advanced security systems.
Yeah, I wouldn't hold a candle to today's hackers.
Hell no, break the most intricate secret codes and master even the most different computer games.
But when he unwittingly taps into the defense department store computer, he initiates a confrontation of global proportions.
Three together with his girlfriend sheety and a wizardly computer genius Tony award winner John Wood.
David must race against time to out with his opponent and prevent a nuclear Armageddon.
Okay, nuclear Armageddon again.
Yeah, how many times.
Third time this week.
How many times of weird time.
And two of them were because I went to white castles.
Oh God, no, no, wait, guys, please, no.
Jesus.
And to think I live with this guy all the time.
See?
No, no, no, we're not talking about Lord Drunken Blue.
We're talking about me.
No white boys.
Yes, yes.
Sadly, if you listen to TBR and you know we got married last April.
So.
Ha ha.
Social features.
Loading Wargames documentary.
Attack of the hacker's feature.
Interactive super power weapons briefing gallery sneak peek at wargames the dead
code.
Original theatrical trailer.
Oh, wow.
They may.
Yeah.
That makes all just things just brings things so far into perspective it's ridiculous.
I mean, today's computer hackers.
They're used to using, you know, high tech weaponry of so on and so forth and got to realize
back in the day it was a Commodore 64 or something of that accord and a phone on top of a piece
of machinery.
It was called a coupler modem.
Thank you.
And the thing is, I never knew what that was.
The thing is a lot of the tricks he uses in this to get where he's going still apply today.
Oh, yeah.
That's the funny part.
I mean, it is literally the root of all hacking.
Okay, root of all evil.
Same difference.
Okay.
Got a list of big names.
Everybody knows, which is kind of unusual for the show.
Usually we've got a bunch of no names that haven't done anything else.
Only on the episodes you've been on so far.
Okay, what do you expect?
A lot of these guys...
Well, we'll get into the people here in a few.
So let's skip on to this section down here about what features it has.
Language, audio, English, Spanish, French, captioned and widescreen.
Let's be digital, subtitled in English, subtitled in Spanish.
1983 color, 113 minutes, door layer.
And now back to shadow step here to describe the DVD art itself.
Yes.
Now that you have an idea of what people are looking for, it's all good.
All right.
Background, the traditional black anyway with the green aspects of computer generated,
old-school targeting systems.
Missile trajectories, ships, biohazards.
And the...
Yeah, biohazard.
MGM logo.
MGM logo.
MGM logo.
Yeah.
And the federal anti-piracy logo right below it.
Oh, joy!
Go blow it out your nose.
Hell, I was saying I was going to get ready to say go blow it out your ass.
Remember, we're not being politically correct.
And at the top, in a population of the background in several areas,
25th anniversary of Dishaners.
And the two main characters in the running model.
Yes, why? Because they're running for their fucking lives.
But now, we've actually got a pretty thick stack of notes here because I was a little...
Yeah, I was a little...
...required the Dish.
Now, this is at 44 pages from the original 68.
Oh, damn!
With the trimming I did.
Wow!
Now this movie was directed by John Batum.
And the two writers were Lawrence Lasker and Walter F. Parks.
Walter F. Parks, why does that name self-familiar?
I'm not sure, but we'll find out.
Look, now the cast list we've got Matthew Broderick as David.
Dabney Coleman as McKitrick.
John Wood as Falcon.
Ali Shidi as Jennifer Barry Corbin as Jennifer Barencher.
June and Clay as Pat Healy, Kent Williams as Cabot.
Dennis Lipscomb as Watson.
Joe Dorsey as Connolly.
Wait a minute, Watson?
Yes, Watson.
So where's the hell's Sherlock?
I think he ended up in a nuke.
Oh, okay.
Dorsey as Connolly, Irving Metsman as Richter, Michael Inson as Barencher's Aid.
William Bogart, Mr. Lightman.
Susan Davis, Miss Lightman.
James Tolkien as Nigen.
And David Clover as Stockman.
Stockman.
What's going on?
What in the hell is with that name and the US government?
Out of all the US government movies I've seen, some character has name of Stockman.
What the hell?
All right.
Well, what a wolf here read off the list of movies that John Batum has directed.
Ooh.
Okay, let's see now, 1997.
In Cognito, 1995, Nick Uptime.
I've seen the movie not too bad.
1994 Drop Zone, 1993, another stakeout.
1993, point of no return.
Ooh, that's what I haven't seen for a while.
1981, The Hard Way, 1990, Bird on a Wire.
1987, stakeout.
1986, Short Circuits.
Awesome movie.
1985, American Flyers, another good movie.
1983, War Games, 83, Blue Thunder.
Oh my God, a train wreck, if I ever saw one.
1981, whose life is it anyway?
1979, Dracula, which version?
The 1979, Dracula.
You can't just...
Okay, is it the one with...
Nevermind.
1977, Saturday Night Fever, holy shit, the same year I was born.
1976, The Bingo Long Traveling All Stars and Motor Kings.
Wow, that's a hell of a title.
1971 to 1973, Night Gallery, holy cow.
I like that.
He actually did 1973, The Doll of Death, and 72,
you can come up now, Mrs. Millican Slash Smith.
Please.
Oh, okay, it's one of the episodes.
72, The Girl with the Hungry Eyes.
72, Green Fingers, Slash the Funeral, Slash the Tune in Dan's Cafe.
And 1971, Cool Air Slash Camera.
Obscura, Slash Quote the Raven.
All episodes of Night Gallery.
Trust me when I say this people, if you've never seen it,
Night Gallery is one of the best freaking sci-fi genre television shows out there.
Now, let's be all honest.
Night Gallery was nothing more than outer limits take two in color.
Hey, I like it.
Two point.
I used to watch it.
I didn't like it.
You know what, Night Gallery was good.
It just didn't have the same impact.
Well, okay.
Then again, too, there was also another show that I believe was called Night Gallery
that was nothing more than basically vampire soap opera.
No, that was a different one.
That was Dark Shadow.
That's it.
That's it.
Okay, I'm sorry, I'm out of my bed.
Now we're going to pass over to Shadow Step here to read off the writing credits
for Lawrence Lasker and Walter F. Parks.
Ooh.
Okay.
Lawrence Lasker.
Lawrence Lasker.
Four games, the dead code.
Four games, 2008.
Three characters.
Three characters.
Sneakers.
Sneakers, two.
1982.
Eddie Dodd.
Eddie Dodd.
Yeah.
We're name it if I ever heard one.
Project X.
Oh.
Project X.
It is seven.
1987.
Four games.
1983.
1983.
Walter F. Parks.
Four games.
The dead codes.
Four games.
The dead codes.
Sneakers.
1992.
Eddie Dodd.
1981.
Four games.
1983.
Yeah.
And as you know, notice, the only difference between these two is Project X by Lawrence Lasker.
Yeah.
The only thing he didn't work on.
But here's the thing.
The, uh, the war games.
Dead code.
2008.
2008.
I've never heard of it.
I've never heard of it.
Is it an actual movie or?
Yes.
It's war games too.
And.
Yeah.
I take it a bit.
You know, going with the times and, oh my god, terrorists.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So.
All right.
We're going to cut over to starting to talk about the different actors and the movies that they've done.
Now, the lists we have here are quite epic.
So, you know, we're going to let each person as they go through their section kind of cherry pick and go over the ones they thought were the most interesting.
And we'll start with Nightchild.
And allow her to do Matthew Broderick.
Yep.
That means put away your crackbait.
They put down the pipe.
Or should I say the DS?
Sorry, folks.
We have technical difficulties as we try to cut the rubber band off her hand.
Rubber band, hell.
I think I think I think super glued.
Get the moat.
Hold on.
You guys.
Sucks the other woman with three men in the air making fun of me and my Pokemon.
God damn move.
Hey.
It's all going to be a glitch.
She loves the fact that she's the only female.
You think so being surrounded by guys is a good thing?
I think you need to name that one and send it off the couch.
Okay.
And now, you don't have to read them all.
Just cherry pick the ones that...
Oh, yeah.
Oh, great.
And I'm looking out the window and it seems God has dandered.
It's snowing.
In other words, for those of you that don't catch my husband, sense of humor.
Okay.
The tale of Desperate 2008, he was a voice.
And I have to say that because my daughter loves that movie.
30 Rock.
He played in one episode.
Cuda Burger.
Nice.
Finding a mandol.
He was a voice in the B movie.
That was actually not a bad movie.
The B movie.
The B movie.
I haven't seen that one.
Oh, huh.
Okay.
Deck the Holes 2006.
The producers.
2005.
Strangers with Candy.
2005.
He was very busy that year.
The Stefford Wives.
That was...
That one was...
Halfway D.S.
No, it's Dr. Chris B.
The Lion King run in a half.
He played Simba.
Screw you, Disney.
Stop making remakes, you assholes.
Please.
And thank you, you morons.
Wow.
Let's see.
Inspector Gadget.
Inspector Gadget.
Oh, come on.
Train rag.
A train rag, if I ever saw one.
Apparently, he did a lot of Lion King movies.
Because here's another one.
Lion King 2.
Well, he...
He did the first Lion King as well.
Oh, Godzilla.
In 98.
Dr. Hempath.
Dr. Hempath.
Dr. Hempath.
Dr. Hempath.
Dr. Hempath.
Dr. Hempath.
Addicted to Lord 97.
Oh, 96.
Oh, 96.
Yeah, 96.
Yeah, that one was too bad.
I liked that movie.
In 94.
That one wasn't too bad.
The road to Elville wasn't bad.
Considering there was a scene in it where a dude is screwing one chick
and has his fist halfway up in another one.
Yes.
The...
Yeah, that...
No.
No.
Forings back to...
No.
The Lion King 94 as the adult symbol.
The night we never met in 93.
The freshman in 1990, everybody remembers that one.
Yeah.
Glory in 89, family business in 89.
Balexie Blues in 88.
Hello.
Hello.
Project X in 87.
First viewers day off.
The big one is known for...
Hello.
The movie that pretty much made him.
Well, I would say that's more the movie that made him a teen or her.
Good.
Good.
Good.
Lady Hawk in 85.
Oh, yes.
I forgot about that.
Yes.
Don't.
Gustle.
Remember that was Renaissance.
Or should I say Dark Ages Frank?
Somebody slapped duct tape over that man's mouth.
What?
A thousand?
Oh, yeah.
I forgot about that.
No, no, no, no.
Her job was to duct tape my hands to the headboard.
I don't think the audience needs to know that much about our sex life.
Anyway, World Games in 83 and Max Dagen returns in 83.
So this was his second.
Max Dagen returns?
Oh, wow.
I haven't seen a while.
Now, if he returned, where was the movie where he left?
It is.
Oh, well.
Now on to Dabney Coleman as McKitrick.
And we'll let Shadow Step do this.
Just remember, get that mic a little closer.
Hold on, hold on, hold on, let me grab the blowtorch.
No, no, I've got a welder right over there.
We'll make it permanent.
Okay.
This works.
Hard for.
Hard 2007.
Now, remember, you don't have to read them all.
Just find the ones that you know or just the title jumps out and add to you.
One that should never have came out recessed, taken the fifth grade.
Oh, my.
A voice as principal pricklings.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Okay.
Okay.
Oh, yeah, I keep forgetting.
Back in, or in this day and age, women can be principal in the movies.
Does?
No, light and mile.
No, light and mile.
2002.
Wow.
Wow.
That's the last thing.
That's the last thing.
Man.
Mike.
Mike.
Mike.
Just Mike.
Just Mike.
How's that?
Yes.
Kiss my act.
Kiss my act.
Recess.
Christmas.
Marathon.
Third Street.
Principal Street.
Peter prickly.
Peter prickly.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Okay.
Okay.
So, wait, wait, wait, wait.
That's right.
I keep forgetting.
Dabney Coleman is not a woman.
It's a dude.
I'm sorry.
I don't recognize some people by their names.
Remember, I recognize faces.
Inspector Gadget.
Inspector Gadget.
Inspector Gadget.
As Chief Quimby.
As Chief Quimby.
Oh, dear Lord.
Yeah.
Notice, two members of the cast of this movie are now.
I have also done that movie.
Oh, dear Lord the world.
Clifford.
Oh, dear Lord the world is going to end.
I would agree.
Anyway, continue fourth.
Clifford.
Gerald Ellis.
Gerald Ellis.
Eh?
Eh?
All right.
All right.
Amos and Andrew.
Amos and Andrew.
Chief of Police.
Amos and Andrew.
Amos and Andrew.
Tolivus.
Tolivus.
Huh.
Silas, Tolivus.
Yes.
Ah, Silas, Tolivus.
Yes.
Sorry.
There goes the neighborhood.
Steve Abbott.
Jeffrey Abbott.
1992.
1992.
1992.
Eh?
Haha.
I'm sorry!
Hey Abbott.
Hey Abbott.
I hate that guy.
Hehehehe.
It means the opposite.
It means the opposite.
Oh God.
Yes.
Oh God.
Yes.
1990.
1990.
On the beef.
On the beef.
Yes.
Do you like the food?
No.
I like the food.
Oh god, yes, yes, that was such a stupid movie.
I'm sorry, that was not a charging movie, but I like it.
It's a charging movie, but I like it.
So where the heart is, like 29 years, as do it in space,
in all honesty, it's not a very good movie.
Not a very good movie.
One page gone.
One page gone.
Dregnet, 1987, 1987, what I heard was not a bad one.
Oh, remember, I remember I had Tom Hanks and Dan Acroix.
Yes.
Very good movie, at least I thought.
Very, very slapstick compared to the original TV series.
One that also just clips and daggers, Jack Flack, Jack Flack, Osborne.
And here is an all-time favorite for all those who love the old TV series, the Muppets
Take Man Hatton, oh yes, oh yes, oh yes, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh oh, oh, oh,
No, nothing worse meaning Dickerson, Dickerson, very much so.
Rolling Thunder Maxwell, Rolling Thunder Maxwell, 1977.
Yeah, that tells you I'm an old fart.
The Midway Captain Ray Arnold.
Pretty decent movie, I will admit.
The other side of the mountains, the other side of the coin.
Ah, here is movie that I would always be dead.
1975, Bite the Void.
Been a while since I've seen it.
The Dove, 1974.
Dove, 1974.
Love is not forever.
Love is not forever.
1974.
1974.
Downhill racer.
Downhill racer.
1969.
As male.
And you know what I think honestly that's probably further back than most of
except for there's a couple of mentions I left on here because he was in three
episodes at the outer limits, two episodes of the Alfred Hitchcock Hour.
Wow, craft suspense theater, two episodes.
That goes all the way back to 1964.
Oh, kidding.
And his first was the two episodes of that.
Wow.
The movie maker was his first one.
Wow.
And now on to John Wood as Falcon.
And we'll pass this one off too.
John Wood.
Oh, let's see now.
How far back to.
Wow.
Okay.
Let's see now.
Actually, we've got one more page for him.
Oh, okay.
So his goes.
Wow.
He goes all the way back to 1952.
Okay.
Let's start at the top here.
When I grow up, I want to be a white.
2008.
2008.
Has the narrator.
Okay.
Let's see now.
The return of the Dancing Master TV series.
I think.
Goodbye, Mr. Chips as Weatherbeam 2002.
Victoria and Albert TV.
2001.
Schokolat in 2000 as.
Gilliam Benlow.
B-L-E-R-O-T.
Yeah.
2000.
A little vampire.
1999.
Mad cows.
Murr.
Don't make me move again.
1998.
The Avengers.
I wonder.
Was he Thor?
Actually, if that's the one I think it is, that actually was starring John Connery as the villain.
Oh, yeah.
It's Thomas Thurman.
Yep.
Thrubshaw was his character in that movie.
Let's see now.
1997.
The gambler as the general.
Sabrina in 1995 as Fairchild, Richard III in 1995, as King Edward IV, sorry.
Close in the wardrobe.
Close in the wardrobe.
1993 as Robert.
Let's see now.
Thatcher, the final day is 1991 TV.
Holy cow.
Here's one people might remember.
He started or not starred, but he was in the movie Jumping Jack Flash.
1986 as Jeremy Talbot.
He was also in Lady Hawk, 1985 as the Bishop of Aquila.
Another Lady Hawk.
War games, 1983 as Falcon.
Somebody killed her husband in 1978 as Ernest Van Staten, slaughterhouse V as Tom Wood.
1972.
Let's see now.
That kind of girl, 1963.
The first gentleman TV, 1961, the rebel 1961, the challenge as the school inspector in 1960,
and last but definitely not least, Stolen Face as Dr. John Jack Wilson in 1952.
All right.
And now on to Ali Shidi, who plays Jennifer.
Now, first and foremost, we've got 10 stories tall.
It just completed production, apparently, and will release sometime in 2010.
Okay.
Let's see.
Trying to see if I see anything on here of her list that just looks interesting or...
We all know.
Or I would give a damn about.
Well, let's see.
I'm having to go back to...
Oh, wait.
Here we go.
This one just makes me smile a little.
Red shoe diaries for auto-erotica.
Oh, my lord.
She was in an episode of that TV show.
HBO.
No, no, no.
This was USA to do.
Oh, USA.
That's right, yes.
You can watch a few of those episodes.
Honey, you better believe it did.
Home alone, too, lost in New York as the New York ticket agent.
Oh, shit.
Let's see.
Fear in 1990 as case bridges.
Short circuit, too.
Oh, yeah.
I forgot she was like that.
Always uncredited as of Stephanie Speck.
She made two orders.
Short circuit in 86.
Yeah.
St. Elmo's fire, the breakfast club.
Those were both 85.
Some people might know Oxford Blues.
We've got war games in 83.
Yeah, that pretty much wraps her up.
At least as far as I'm concerned.
We're going on to Barry Corbin.
Yeah, this one is pretty long.
And I'm going to handle...
Wait, I've got a couple of mashed here together,
but we'll figure it out.
Or apparently they weren't that important.
Okay.
Who wants Corbin?
You know what?
Put the crackle in.
You get Corbin.
Give up my crack.
God damn it.
Okay.
Here we go.
D-D's, D-D's.
And Drassy Street 60, which is in production,
2009 president of Hungary.
Next door neighbor, 2010 post-production.
Most of these are 2009, 2010.
Okay.
One, my kids would get...
Ben, 10, alien swarm.
TV.
Actually, that came out.
Grandpa, I'm not going to be on DVD.
Beer for my horses.
I have yet to see that one either.
Oh my God.
In the Valley of Ella.
No country for old men.
I've heard that was pretty decent movie.
The Duke's of Hazard, 2005,
Uncredited Mr. Pullman.
Backwater Elegy.
2003 is J.T.
Waiting to live as view for Pike.
Race to space.
We never heard of it.
Command and conquer.
Video game.
Video game.
Yuri's revenge.
As general Ben Carville.
Do not touch my crack.
I don't want your crack in the deck.
It's trying to lose a finger.
Command and conquer.
Red alert, 2001 video game.
General Ben Carville.
You want me to get through this.
Cut that shit out.
The journey men.
2001 Charlie Ledbetter.
Yes, please quick rubbing her crack.
That's my job.
And my brain goes.
It's like great.
Okay.
The shadows just got to walk around with his head up.
Good.
Wow.
Nice healing.
Time quest.
2000 is Lyndon Johnson.
Healed with the kiss.
99.
Wink.
Pop.
Blake.
Yes, I swear to God that's what it says.
Judgement Day.
The Ellie Nestler story is Tony Sarrar.
Command and conquer.
Command and conquer.
Yeah.
We lost it.
Keep it down.
Red alert, retaliation.
Same general.
Let's see.
Murder is corporate.
Calvert.
Crush Kill and Destroy.
Video game.
As a human general.
Steven Spielberg.
Wow.
Director's chair.
Video game.
Voice of Warden.
Oh, let's see.
The Pandora Directive.
Video game.
This guy does a lot of fucking video games.
Sounds like a lot of the people we look through on some of these movies.
It looks like he does mostly video games and TV shows.
Welcome to it.
Raising Canes.
A TV series.
Doesn't say who he played.
Connager.
Charlie McCloud.
Stage driver.
A.K.A. Lewis Lamores.
Connager.
Yeah, that was a pretty decent movie starring Sam Elliott.
Ghost Dad in 1990.
Wow.
Mr. Emory Collins.
Wait a minute.
Ghost Dad.
Is that the one that was such a good job?
Yeah.
That's what I thought.
Many series.
Roscoe Brown.
Unknown episodes.
Whoa.
Wait a minute.
What year?
Okay.
In that case, it wasn't the original many series.
DJ Downing.
Uh, see.
Critters to the main course.
May the eight.
Oh, yes.
Nothing like small, furry animals that roll around and eat things.
Kind of like your kids.
Uh-huh.
Young Harry Houdini.
TV series.
87.
I actually saw that.
Yeah, that was a decent series.
Oh, wow.
The under siege in 86.
My science project in 85.
As Lou Houdini.
There's the one I haven't seen in years.
My science project.
That's a bizarre movie.
Guy goes to a military junkyard, scrunches up something.
He's like, yeah, I'll say this is my science project.
And somehow it opens the gateway through time.
The man who loved women.
Three is written.
Three is written.
Three is written.
Where are games in 83 is general baringer.
Uh-huh.
Let's see.
Best little whorehouse in Texas.
Starring another one with Dolly Park and Amber Reynolds.
Um, see.
Okay.
Yeah, it says you could tell.
Okay.
The night's the light.
The night's the light.
And 81.
Holy shit.
That's what I haven't seen in years.
And basically, he did.
TV, TV, TV, TV, Urban Cowboy 1980.
Uncle Bob, that's his credit.
Wow.
And now, on for one and play, the character Pat Healey.
Go for it, Shadow.
Go for it, Shadow.
That's all it.
Nope, that's all.
I trimmed him heavily.
Well, this is a very short list.
Oh, this is a very short list.
War games in 83 has Pat Healey.
That is Pat Healey.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
You can't forget the first one on the list.
Our family honor, 1985, as Rita Danzig.
A legend of the lone ranger, the lone striker.
81.
Lisa wasn't the lone rangers.
How can you pluralize the lone rangers?
This is an offshoot of a very similar release.
Fantastic seven.
Fantastic seven.
Yes, it was.
And a lot of more.
And of course, that was.
Because it was.
1978 TV.
This chick.
Yeah.
And now for Kent Williams.
And this one, this guy is pretty interesting to me.
The first thing I'm going to hit is Dragon Ball Z.
This guy basically is a heavily used to doing voice over work
for anime that gets dubbed into English.
So let's see some of the highlights.
Dragon Ball Z.
Neon Genesis Evangelion.
Vexile.
One piece.
He did Gray Man.
He did Neon Genesis.
Not bad.
Yep.
Hell girl.
God, there's been a while since I've seen that one.
School Rumble for semester.
Some more speed graphar.
Shinobi.
Shinobi wasn't too bad.
Let's see.
Full metal alchemist.
Oh, shit.
TV series.
Bayblade Yu-Yu Haka Show.
The narrator for 29 episodes.
Of Yu-Yu Haka Show?
Yes.
Wow.
Gunslinger Girl.
Blue Gender The Warrior.
Fruits Basket.
Female people.
Female listeners might really enjoy that.
Anime.
Blue Gender.
Blue Gender is an interesting one.
I gotta give it that.
Blue seat is better in my opinion.
He did, you know, and then a lot of TV shows.
He was in a MacGyver episode.
Who hasn't been in a MacGyver episode?
Oh, wait. Arnold Schwarzenegger.
My camera.
Oh, wow. He was in a MacGyver episode?
Yep.
Oh, cool.
And, you know.
And, of course, the one we're talking about.
Yeah, as you say.
As you can tell, growing up, my parents watched some interesting shows.
My camera was fencer for hire, so on and so forth.
And now on to Dennis Lipscomb as Watson.
Hmm.
All right, Watson, where the hell sure a lot.
Oh, yeah. He's currently 10 feet underground, stone out of his guard.
2001, the Medicine Show.
Let's see, now Apollo 11, 1996 TV.
He was in an episode of Melrose Place in 1995.
Yeah, I agree.
1994, he was in two episodes of Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman.
Oh, no.
Without warning, 1994 TV.
Undercover Blues, 1993 as Foster.
Interesting.
Under siege, 1992 as David Trenton National Security Advisor.
Yay.
He was in an episode of Perry Mason, the case of the glass coffin, 1991.
Cop Rock, 1990 TV series.
Wow, he's got a lot of TV credits on here.
Sister, sister, 1987, a sheriff.
Cleveland, Dosey or something of that accord.
At this point, let's skip TV listings unless it really sticks out.
Retribution, 1987.
Slowburn.
Oh, wait a minute.
That's TV.
Crossroads, 1986 as Lloyd.
Wow, I'm going to have to watch that movie again.
A soldier's story, 1984 is Captain Taylor, Wargames, 1983.
Lovechild, 1982.
Penitentiary, 1982.
Wings of Ash, pilot for a dramatization of the life of Antonin R. Trod, 1978.
Okay, I'm doing Dennis Lipscomb, right?
Yes.
Okay, in that case, that's pretty much the end of his.
And now on to Joe Dorsey as calmly, and we'll allow Nightchild to do this one.
And he's rubbing his hands together, which just makes me nervous.
All right, killing midnight, 1997, Anthony Chambers.
Penitentiary 2, 92 as the caretaker.
Interesting.
Taking back my life, financing.
Yes.
Zagon Meyer story.
His detective loss.
Ah, knocking out TV.
Shadows in the storm, 1988 as Joe Dorsey.
Birkenstock, let's see.
Yeah, he spelled his name a little bit differently, so they had to put it in there.
Joe Dorsey with a C instead of an S.
Oh, my God.
Oh, let's see.
Real genius in 85.
I'm sorry, I'm going to have to take that cheeseburger away from you.
It's going to give you gin on his breast.
Do it!
Wait a minute.
Did I just hear that correctly?
Real genius.
Real genius.
Congressman.
Howl.
Dougton.
The Philadelphia.
1984 as Sheriff Bates.
No, that's what I was thinking.
1983 as Conley.
Oh, did it, did it, did it, did it.
All these, I'm stupid to me.
More than Ray.
1979.
The one of those, okay.
He put his name a little differently as Joe A. Dorsey this time playing Woodrow Thompson.
They went that way and that way.
Bill.
Okay, who the hell was he playing?
One of the little sprites on Willow.
Which way do we go?
We got that away.
Grizzly in 1976 is Charlie Kittridge.
And one that came.
Who loves my baby?
The longest yard in 1970.
Oh, yes.
Oh, yes.
The original version starring Bert Reynolds.
And also had the guy from the Adams family that played Lurch as one of the inmates.
Okay, next.
Next.
Let's see.
Yeah, that's definitely one we ought to do a TBR on it.
The original men, I'm going to pass it up.
You know, honestly, I think we're going to skip on past most of these.
Unless it's got like Michael Irons side or some other bullshit in it.
We're going to go to James Tolkien.
Just because there's a couple here, I want to highlight.
Bloodfish 4, die trying.
Right.
They died trying to make this movie, apparently.
Yeah.
Agent Sterling.
Problem child 2.
Okay.
Dick Tracy 1990 as numbers.
Interesting.
Now, this is the one where people will start to realize who the fuck this guy is.
Back to the future part 3.
Chief Marshall James Strickland.
Yes.
Back to the future part 2.
Mr Strickland.
Yep.
Case of the Hillside Stranglers.
Yeah, that was a good one.
Now, that was a TV thing, but it was still fairly good from all accounts.
Masters of the Universe Detective Lubbock.
Yes.
Armed and dangerous.
Yep.
Good movie.
Top Gun as Stinger.
Oh, hell yes.
Back to the future.
Mr Strickland.
War games.
As Nigen.
The Amityville Horror 1979.
Oh, it's been a while.
Yeah, it's been a while.
Okay.
1973.
I think I want to see this one.
The Werewolf of Washington.
Dark Glasses.
Oh, damn.
I've heard of it, but I haven't seen it.
Yeah, we definitely got to get that one.
Yep.
And, you know what, Dave Clover and everyone else we've skipped.
I'm sorry, you're just not that interesting for us, really.
Sawie.
You are the weakest link.
Good bye.
What do you do?
All right.
You are the weakest link.
Now, before we go and watch the movie, anyone have any thoughts about any of the crap we've
rambled through so far or what they can remember the movie.
Not that much.
It's been so long since I've seen it.
I mean, yeah.
No, he just said, okay, we're doing war games.
And I was like, oh, hell, you ain't made it.
You need that Matthew Broder movie for, like, what I was like, three?
Three upsides a smaller, you mean that?
You shouldn't have had those cheeseburgers.
Oh, I can move.
Is now single because he's obsessing.
Come on.
I was doing that beforehand.
Just not in front of you.
He heard them all.
Yeah, unfortunately.
What are you talking about?
You commented and scored some of them.
Yeah, I'm definitely not getting late for a while.
Thanks a lot, dear.
I thought you were supposed to be on my side.
I always am.
Well, at least I'm not making fun of you at this time.
Just walking around, like, with his head up and here, going, yeah, you know, you may tease, but that's my baby.
Exactly.
Now, the thing I'll say, there's been a lot of movies about hacking into things and doing all this.
But of all of them, this one probably still exists.
This and sneakers probably are the two that stick out the most as being the most realistic for more than I can remember of them all.
Pretty straightforward.
I mean, simple tricks like, you know, being in the principal's office and pulling out a drawer and in there is taped the password bliss for the week.
This is shit people haven't learned to fix in years, even to this day.
Oh, for crying out loud.
There was something on the news a couple nights ago where hackers are still getting into people's my space, Facebook.
Yahoo accounts. So and so forth. Why? Because their frigate passwords are too goddamn simple.
I mean, ABC123. Hello. You don't do that shit.
Hey, come on, come on. Are you telling me my password of 12345?
12345. I have the number on my luggage.
Get in the mood.
Oh, shit. There goes the planet.
I don't know. I saw it.
It's space ball one. She's gone from suck to blue.
No, there isn't any sexual content there.
Oh, I'm there.
Do a little irritated about the whole...
Do you? Do you?
Good.
Do you? Good.
Yes.
Something later explain about the stuff.
No, that is a story for when we get to war game or when we get to space balls.
It's very true because that movie is five bucks.
Hell yes.
So you know what?
It's been so long since any of us has seen it.
I don't think we really have anything intelligent to say about it.
We never have anything intelligent to say anything.
Well, you may not.
I occasionally say something intelligent.
I mean, it is about that time of the decade for me.
All right. And with that folks, we will catch you after the break.
All right. And we are back after the break.
So, initial impressions everyone.
I certainly didn't remember that much about the movie.
Definitely awesome.
I had forgotten a lot about that movie and oh my god.
I forgot exactly how hair raising it could get.
Explosive. Very, very explosive.
I mean, it gets your tensions going from the start.
And then when you think all is nice and calm, it lets you relax a little bit.
And then it just kicks you right in the shorts again.
So now we will go into the descriptions here.
Who wants to kick off with the main menu?
Now, I think we will let Shadow here.
Come on. Give it a shot, man. You can do this.
I will give it this. It had really good graphics.
I mean, basically portrayed what it showed on the cover.
But with more of an oomph behind it.
Very animated showing you missiles launching and landing.
I think it is that it was also done in 3D graphics as well.
Very true.
So you could actually see the actual arc.
And it rotates around and stuff.
I mean, I have to say it is probably one of the better ones we have seen.
And the thing that really got me was the whole play movie, special features, scene selection,
all this done up and the old, just the extremely large pixelated lettering.
And oh my god, that was just, I was like, hey, that works.
That is very nice, very nice touch.
And I will not, I will say this now, I will not be digging this movie for subtitles because it does have them.
Now what Shadow here doesn't know, I have a history of any movie that doesn't have subtitles automatic deduction.
But I'm a person who sometimes late at night, I can't have it up loud.
So I have subtitles going so I can fill in those blanks when you have someone whispering something.
Unless of course your TV does the whole character whispering.
And as the subtitles, like you goddamn it.
Well, you can't avoid that one.
All right, so opening scenes here.
The opening scene right after you press play.
Oh god, I'm sorry.
You have a vehicle traveling.
Oh yeah, that's right, that old piece.
You storm.
Literally, I'd say 80-81 model Jeep Grand Wagon Air.
Big as long wheelbase SUV made by Jeep full size V8 4-wheel drive.
Trust me, I've been dying to get all the one of these things for years.
Running through this large...
She has more of a heart on her, is wife for the car zealots.
Both, actually.
But running through this dust storm.
And all of a sudden pulls up to this interesting looking suburbian looking house.
Kind of a ranch-style house in the middle of nowhere.
Yeah, literally middle of nowhere.
If you've dead trees here and there, or possibly limbs, got only nose.
Two guys get out one carrying a case.
Big metal, I'd say, one foot wide by like three foot long, by like a foot and a half deep.
Kind of thing.
Walk into the house.
All of a sudden, big pan inside.
They take off their jackets.
We cut inside.
Well, as they're inside.
Well, I was going to say boom, camera, camera goes boom.
Right inside of the living room.
Very, very suburbian style layout to the living room.
Next thing you know, these two guys come in, big dust cloud.
Close the door, stomp, stomp, stomp.
You know, wiping the dust off of them.
Well, both of them walk up to the mirror that has the hood hooks or the hat hooks on it.
One sets the case down, and we'll send they both pull out IDs.
And then we cut to the other side of the mirror.
Well, no, it lights up in front of them.
Then we cut to the other side of the mirror.
Yes.
We see a military dude looking at him and buzzes him through.
Yep.
Now what do we got going next here, Shadow?
Well, inside this secret room, we pin right to another military dressed figure opening this safe.
And out pulls through two snug nose revolvers.
Probably 38s, you know, often known as, you know, Saturday night specials.
What really got me is that they only gave them three rounds.
A piece, pulls out six rounds, sets them on top of the safe.
I mean, in my personal opinion, I would have at least given four pieces.
Well, when we cut in a little further, it makes a little more sense why they would only need three.
Yeah.
Very true.
The elevator, then this long corridor with this big ass metal door.
We're talking prop, you know, they come down out of the elevator.
And there's an exchange between them and the people who are inside as the door's opening.
And this is a foot in a half to two foot, easy, solid metal door.
Yeah.
And you quickly catch this is a blast door.
Yeah.
Easily able to withstand, you know, nuclear strike.
The room inside, though.
Oh, dear God.
Is it claustrophobia?
Well, I am claustrophobic.
I am highly claustrophobic.
And these guys are supposed to spend 24 hours in a room that's probably 15 foot long by like eight foot wide with computers everywhere.
Now, at least it looked like they had fairly comfortable chairs.
Yeah, I got to agree that.
But still, I couldn't spend 24 hours in there.
I ended up going nuts.
Same here.
And the door's shut.
Well, you don't remember the part where, you know, they did be exchanged.
And the guys that were leaving said something about they hadn't been on time for the last six months.
And they were written up in the logbook.
I was like, yeah, pricks.
Yeah.
Can we say, click.
What the very, very small, click, do you have it?
No, no, no, no, that's right.
You're right.
You click.
They're like 10 minutes late.
Come on now.
Yeah.
Well, hey, if I'd been shutting a room for 24 hours, every minute can't rise up there at the last bit.
My name is Dametrain.
It's four minutes late now.
That's four minutes.
I'm not going to get back me.
Well, considering I work in a prison, you know, I can definitely qualify with the whole 10 minutes.
God damn it.
The last 10 minutes of work is definitely the longest, especially when you're in an environment where you're kind of closed in.
And they're not inside this room more than 10 minutes before alarms go off.
And a computerized voice comes across announcing a encoded message.
They start pulling out little red books, markers, this, that, and the others start writing down the letters and numbers, this, that, and the other.
It's not long before you finally realize they're setting up to get right at a launch.
Yep.
And I mean, the tensions building, you can see both guys.
Start to sweat.
Yeah.
Especially the guy in control.
He's especially.
He even goes so far as during their whole launch protocol to break with the procedure and say, get me someone on the phone.
I don't want to kill 20 million people and not know for sure what's going on.
Yeah.
And the line is dead.
We are moving right towards World War III folks.
That's right.
Merry Christmas.
Your teeth are going to be bright as green.
Bright as green.
Shit.
The pain is going to get sucked off your house and your family's going to have a permanent orange afro.
In the famous words of Dan Acroid.
Exactly.
Which is definitely another movie.
I think we ought to do a TBR on some time.
Actually, if you're talking about the one I'm thinking about, that's going to be a two-parter.
Oh.
Oh, hell yeah.
Hell yeah.
Anyway, moving on.
Moving on.
And at the last seconds.
The commander is saying, no, I'm not going to do it.
Drops his hand.
I can't do it.
I can't do it.
The other guy being played by Michael Madsen for God's sakes.
The B movie cop tough guy of the mid and late 90s.
Pulls out his gun.
Drops the hammer says, sir, put your hand back on the key.
We need to get this done now.
And that's where we end.
That scene.
Directly cut.
Inside a fucking NORAD.
And just as a little FYI for people who haven't figured out.
A little bit of information about this one set piece up to this time.
This was the most expensive set piece built for any movie.
They spent a million dollars in the early 80s to build this.
And when they finally got to see what NORAD really looked like.
This is NORAD's wet dream.
Yes.
Nor at the time NORAD wished they had something that nice.
And you have people showing up at NORAD.
And there are suits.
Some wearing full fucking dress uniforms.
No, no, the people we're focusing on are two guys in suit.
Oh, yeah, good point, good point.
And they've got this whole conversation going as they're coming up.
And heading towards a meeting with the general who runs the place.
And, you know, a couple other people.
And in it, it comes out that this was a test drill that was happening at the beginning.
They figured out by putting every person who was sat in front of these keys
that 22% of everyone failed to pull the keys.
Yep.
Why? Because they didn't have the cajones to turn the keys and possibly kill millions of people.
You know, it's one thing to kill, you know, a couple dozen people in person.
But to drop a bomb on someone from a distance.
You know what, that's the Nintendo generation.
We're not there yet.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
You got to realize, though, I've actually met guys from Vietnam
and, you know, little skirmishes between Vietnam and Grenada in the early 90s
that have dropped bombs on people.
That was their whole job.
And these guys still have nightmares because they may not have seen the faces.
But for some reason, in their nightmares, they're still hearing the screens.
And in all honesty, I got to give those guys props because of that shit
because it takes a lot of fucking guts to be able to actually push a button,
drop a bomb on thousands of people and not see a fucking face.
Especially when you're talking about bombs that aren't high precision.
Exactly.
You know, when you start talking about, you know, pinpoint,
that's almost easier to cope with, I imagine.
But moving.
So, they...
I forget the guy's name.
It starts with a B, someone.
Oh, I can't say.
Anyway, basically...
The list is over there.
That will help.
We threw this stuff away a little too soon.
Yeah.
Okay.
Okay.
No barongers, the guy runs the place.
Yep.
And it's McKitrick.
That's it.
McKitrick.
The side brings up and introduces the wopper.
Basically, he introduces it by the few words.
Well, in that case, then, let's take the human out of the equation.
Right there.
That right there is the largest famous last words I've ever heard.
That's part where everybody in the room kind of started cringing.
Yeah.
It was scared.
Baron...
Baronger goes off about it.
Oh, yeah.
The two political types who are there, they're all in.
Yeah, they're like, well, let's see what you're talking about here.
Ah!
And we say terminator.
This is how this kind of shit started.
And they introduce the wopper, which is a machine that just calculates World War III.
War?
Operation...
Plaming...
Plaming...
I know.
Yeah.
Anyone?
So.
But as one of the technicians said, this thing has run World War III scenarios every minute of every day, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
365 days a year.
Yep.
I'm sorry, but do I really want to leave my possible security up to a machine?
No.
No.
If my...
You know, if I'm going to get nuked, I...
I want, you know, someone to be behind the key, at least.
Exactly.
It's a weird thing, but hey.
Oh, yeah.
That's a human being making a decision instead of a cold, calculating, unfeeling machine making said decision.
Yeah.
And that pretty much wraps...
The wrap on this scene is that they go, we're going to recommend this to the president.
I'm sure the joint chiefs will have something to say.
And Berenger, you're damn right.
We would...
Yeah.
Anyway, next scene we cut to back to that long, straight-rooving.
Yeah.
Go ahead.
I thought you had...
Oh, it was just the whole well, you know.
This guy keeps saying, over and over again, well, we got to be on a plane in less than an hour.
Well, give me five minutes and then leads them out here to show them this machine that's going to...
Yeah.
To anybody that knows anything about computers, you know what?
They may not have the whole human condition, but they have a bigger problem.
It's called, they don't give a flying fucking hell.
Exactly.
You know.
In the end, it's numbers.
It's logic.
It's going to try to maximize, you know, effectiveness while minimizing, you know, retaliatory strikes.
No.
No.
No.
I'm sorry.
I would rather be standing there in a cold, waste land looking down the sites of a rifle
and being able to see the faces of those of whom I'm killing as a soldier,
instead of standing there looking at a computer screen going,
looks like 20 million people just got dead.
Yep.
Now, after all of this, the next thing we cut to of all things is a kid at a Gallagher machine.
Oh, wait, wait, you almost forgot.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
The scene in the friggin' the key room.
The two guys that were in there that were going through that drill, Michael Matzen's character,
and the other guy are walking out as their, as two technicians are carrying out seats
to set in the other wall.
One technician in the area where the keys were going beforehand, a number pad.
Basically, an LED display.
And the guy who was refused to pull the key just kind of stops and looks at it as they put it in
and you can see a mild chain of sweat on them.
Yeah, that look of my god.
This is what's going to be making the decision for now on.
It's almost like just from the facial expressions.
I don't know if it was intended, but the actor did a very good job of portraying
I should have pulled the fucking key.
This wouldn't have happened maybe if I had turned the key.
Yeah.
Is that look of okay?
Maybe I should have done what I, that look, look of regret.
Yeah, and anxiety.
It was kind of an angsty look like, oh god, this is not going to end well.
Yeah.
You know, and if he's smart enough to figure out, this is not going to end well.
Oh my god.
And you can clearly see on this actor's face, what the hell did I just do?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I would have turned the key.
Our hands still have this job.
Our hands were not now being the hands of a machine.
Okay.
I said it when we were at the very end of the movie.
I don't know if you were in the room or not, but it's one of those situations where you got to think.
This is the kind of stuff that could easily happen.
I mean, it is feasible.
It is very feasible.
I mean, for crying a lot, I've been hearing stories of possibility of the regular soldier being taken out of the equation
and all of a sudden reanimated dead bodies as soldiers going into war.
Hello.
Can we say none of the living dead possibly?
I mean, it's all kinds of, some of the movies that are coming out nowadays or even back in the past, back in the 80s and early 90s, some of this stuff could actually happen.
Yep.
And now to the scene I was talking about a moment ago, we got to a kid playing a Gallagher machine and he's just wailing on it.
Oh, my God.
He's just kicking all kinds of fucking ass.
Just jamming on that stick.
Believe me when I say this, I played that game for as an arcade and trust me, I got my ass handed to me on more than one occasion.
Oh, yeah.
Missile command, remember, had the push button and the wheel.
The track ball.
Yeah, the track ball.
I played that and was, I mean, I was a fucking master at that game, but the Galactica, I got my ass handed to me.
More than one occasion.
And, you know, as he's jamming, other kids start sprinting out and he pulls out his watch and as another kid comes up,
take this and he sprints off, right into class, wait.
I think it is though, he starts to run out, stops, runs back, grabs a blue book and runs out.
Next thing you know, you seem running up into a high school, Sherman high school to be specific.
And then all of a sudden you see a teacher asking scientific questions specifically about, oh, I don't know, plans.
And then all of a sudden you seem, what?
Run up to the door, look in, it's like, oh crap, tries to sneak in, gets almost all the way to his desk and all of a sudden the teacher calls his name.
The teacher, I don't think we've got the teacher's name, but it was David.
Hello, David, nice of you to join us.
Please come up here.
I got a present for you and hands him a blue paper test with a big fat red F on it.
And he made sure he showed it well enough as the entire class could see it.
How many times I wonder has this happened to any of our listeners out there?
Yes, you know some teachers are pricks like that.
No shit.
I couldn't have come home with an F if I wanted to live, my dad is a science teacher.
Oh god, yeah, I forgot about that, thank you babe.
Now, the other fun thing there that happens is, you know, he starts discussing the questions.
And he has female Jennifer, we find out later.
Why do nitrogen nodules cling to the roots of plants?
And she looks up and smiles sweetly.
Rob?
Yes, no, she's got a teenager at all already.
Oh no.
Yeah, this is the eight typical early eighties teenager.
This is the synthesis of early eighties teenager, okay?
And the teacher, you know, hands her the test with a nice big fat F on it too.
And then all of a sudden he asks the next question, talking about asexual reproduction.
Who was it who first came, proposed the idea of reproducing without sex?
And David kind of whispers, you can't really quite hear him unless you have it really way up.
And Jennifer just starts giggle, giggle, giggle, giggle, giggle.
And the teacher looks back, would you mind sharing what's so funny?
He can't help but to look back at David, look up at the teacher, giggle, look back at David.
And the teacher decides to ask, David, what's so funny?
And David simply replied, when asked the question, who do you think was who came up with the idea of reproduction without sex?
And he blatantly says with a big, cheesy smile on his face, your wife.
And the teacher throws him out and he sends him directly to the office.
That scene happened all four of us in the room just got, oh!
Oh, damn, that hurts, that so hurts.
Because that would happen to me in high school, I literally got my ass kicked up between my shoulder blades.
Especially considering most of the middle school and high school teacher knew me by all three of my names.
I realized one of my science teachers in high school was a guy that stood six foot eight, weighed almost 500 pounds.
Okay, named Mr. Goodman.
Okay.
And was the kind of guy you was soft-spoken for the most part, a little bit loud, but you know, he didn't raise his voice.
He was that, you know, boisterous kind of volume he had, you know.
But very well-natured.
I've seen that man blow his top twice.
First time, okay, I wasn't there, but I heard about it.
The second time I was there and trust me when I say this, I wanted to crawl out the window.
Thankfully, he wasn't pissed off at me.
And, you know, then the next scene we cut to, he's in the office and talking to a black lady behind his secretary, obviously.
Yeah.
And he's...
Teacher wants me to come in and discuss my poor attitude.
And she smiles.
The principal is really tired of discussing your poor attitude.
I'm sure he is.
And he walks around to the alto.
Yeah.
I don't know too many high schools, especially in Seattle, like that.
Well, anyway.
And he walks around to this little alcove where, you know, the principal's office or dean of students.
It's never real.
I don't think he ever says principal.
He just says Mr. whatever.
Yeah.
So it could have been a principal, vice-principles, dean of student.
Exactly.
Hell, it could have been the superintendent for all we know.
And he sits down and looks around.
No one's looking.
He sits up and pulls out a drawer.
And in the drawer is a list of passwords.
Idiots.
Yes.
Hold it.
It's one of those writing slats that is in really old desks.
Oh, God.
Or really nice ones nowadays.
It's just a single sheet of tissue.
Piece of wood about, I'd say, three quarter of an inch thick.
And about, I'd say, half to three quarter of an inch wider than a normal everyday sheet of paper.
Paper.
Yeah.
And for some stupid reason, they have this old yellow piece of paper where they have written down about a dozen passwords.
And mark them out and then written something else on there.
And it's taped onto this thing.
Within easy access of the student body.
Hello.
Can we see stupid?
Hello, retard.
But anyway.
And the password is pencil.
Wow.
I just saw everything spike on our paper here.
Yep.
Anyway, the next thing you know, he sits back down just as whoever it is he needs to go talk to.
Opens up his doors as up.
David.
Come on in.
Have you ever pleased?
I think he actually says Mr. Lightman.
Yeah, that's it.
Lightman.
That's it.
And then we cut scene.
Then we cut to David.
Yeah, we're writing down the street.
Is it all the sudden?
Jennifer writes up on this motorized moped.
You know.
Motorized moped.
You know what I mean.
One of those want to be motorcycles.
Yeah.
It's like a motorcycle, but it's literally just got nothing more than a two-stroke lawnmower angel on it.
And she, you know.
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to get you in trouble.
Can I give you a ride home?
I'm not going to repeat what the hell we were talking about.
Drock and Blue said during that scene.
I'll ride her home.
He never mind.
He said it anyway.
Anyway.
So he hops on the bag.
And the first thing that I'm thinking as he reaches around to grab a hold of her is okay.
His hands are a little too high.
They're okay.
Never mind.
No, no.
Boy, you don't grab up that high.
You grab the hips.
It gives you better leverage.
Hell yeah.
You'll learn.
He's a teenager.
Exactly.
Exactly.
Anyway.
Next thing you know.
She starts riding off in all of you.
All of a sudden.
Oh, God.
Definitely tell he's a virgin.
I'm sorry.
I have to remind you.
He is married to Sarah Jessica.
But very much doubt.
He's learned much of anything.
Oh.
Can you say boom?
Oh, my God.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
But sex in the city just took a whole new twist from that line.
What sex in the city?
That's the one word missing off that title.
Yes.
Yes.
Anyway.
But all of a sudden.
They cut.
Well, what are you planning on doing?
What are you planning on doing?
Because he's talking about it.
Don't worry.
I'm.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
They're riding along up the hill here.
And all of a sudden he's like.
She's like.
Do you aren't you anxious or whatever?
Because you know, we both just failed biology, you know.
So we're going to have to take summer school.
No, we're not.
No, I'm not going to.
He says nothing.
Oh, yeah.
That's right.
That's right.
But analysis.
What are you going to do?
What are you going to do?
Show me.
Show me.
Yeah.
Show me.
Show me.
Or no.
Tell me.
Tell me.
Tell me.
And he's like.
No, no.
Take it right up here.
And I'll show you.
And they walk into his place.
Both.
No parents are home.
She walks in.
Aren't your parents home?
No.
They both work.
Typical.
1980.
And very nice, turned wood banisters on the stairs.
And he's like.
You know, she's like.
Your parents home?
No, no.
They both work.
Come on up.
And on his door, it says caution restricted area.
Something like that, you know.
Yeah, you know.
The kind of thing that a typical, you know.
Teenage or what?
Teenage males should have on his door.
Because my god, you walk it at the wrong time.
You're going to, you know, see something you shouldn't.
Although I have never quite seen a teenager's door that had their own lock.
I sure as hell wouldn't allow one of my kids to lock their car or lock their door without me having a key to it.
Fuck that shit.
Well, the other thing is this is an older-style house you can tell by the key.
It's not that hard to get around those kind of keys.
Oh, yeah, the old six inch long skeleton key.
Yeah, not that hard.
Yes.
And walk in, and this boy is decked on computers for that age.
I mean, we're talking easily several thousand dollars worth of computer hardware running the old-style eight inch floppy disk.
Oh, my god.
Do you know how long it's been since I've seen a five and a half inch?
Yeah.
Um, last night.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Wolf, I'm sorry.
You should have known before now she did spend the night with me last night.
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
And, you know, of course, I will continue to touch her boobs.
Yeah, she, as he, uh, yeah, I should say she.
Anyway, but no, the thing that gets me is they walk in and he's got all the computer hardware.
His bed is made kind of pseudo.
I mean, the pillow is exposed, you know, uh, and the clothes on the bed, the one thing that is his
tidities on the top.
Don't mind a little messy.
Yeah, a little messy as he picks up a small armload of clothes.
Um, I'm sorry, but when I was his age, I had clothes everywhere all over the floor, okay?
And, you know, he proceeds at this point to strut his stuff and log into the school system.
And after pulling out this, what looked to be like a magazine, opening it up, pulling out an eight-inch
floppy, looks at it, real carefully, I mean, less than six inches away from his face.
Okay.
It's like, uh, oh yeah, got the right one.
Click, click.
Oh yeah.
And he proceeds to dial into the computer system at the school.
Now, now we need, I need to explain this one because some of the younger people might not know what
you know, this kind of stuff is working.
He literally picks up an old-school phone, dials, waits until he hears a couple tones, and then puts the
phone handset into a coupler modem.
Now, anyone who hasn't seen this, a coupler modem was a large device that had these two large
rubber pads and mic pickup and a speaker in them that you would snap it in and that's how it would
work.
We're talking 300 BPS.
Yes.
300 bytes per second.
If you want a bitch about 10 megs, no.
And we're talking old-school now.
Now, the thing you have to keep in mind though, 300 BPS back then was fairly quick because
all you were displaying was text.
Exactly.
So it didn't take much to show it.
I mean, that was almost instantaneous.
Boom.
Hey, yes we got it.
And he proceeds to change his grade to a C from an F.
And then he, you know, starts typing in her name and do you have a middle name?
K, for Kristen or something like that.
Catherine.
Oh, Catherine.
What a hot name.
I used to date a Catherine.
I don't want to hear this.
Dude, I've seen the people you've dated.
You finally found one who doesn't make me want to barf it a bag.
Put the bag over my head.
Barf it another one and repeat.
I think that's a compliment.
Okay.
I'll take it.
Anyway.
But all of a sudden, he types it in and all of a sudden.
Boom.
Up comes her grade.
Same as his F look biology.
Which is at the very friggin' top.
Though he says, how do you get it D in Homec?
Which I got to agree with that question.
How does anybody get a D in Homec?
Okay.
I could barely sew.
I could cook.
Thank God.
Oh yes.
Thank God.
And I aced Homec.
I flunked it.
Okay.
Moving right along before we get asked.
We're going to start mocking him more than normal.
Anyway.
Go darn some socks.
We're done with you.
Anyway.
Next thing you know, she's like, no, no, no.
Change it back.
Change it back.
We're going to get in trouble.
Change it back.
And also he's like, all right, fine, fine.
Change is a bag.
And she's, you know, okay.
But he doesn't enter as she starts to leave.
And as soon as she walks out, back.
This is the door.
Backspace A.
And then he proceeds.
This is an old school thing that has actually seen a
resurgence in recent days.
Starts doing something called war dialing.
Oh, this was after dinner.
Remember?
Yes, yes.
Yes.
He's looking through a magazine during dinner.
His mom?
Yeah, okay.
This is where we find out, yes.
Both parents work.
Dad got only knows what the hell he does because he looks like
a typical geek.
Okay, let me retake free phrase that.
A typical 80s geek.
Big ass glasses.
Really short fucked up haircut.
Sweater vest.
Over a white button-up shirt.
No tie.
And mom is on the phone with a jacket that says carpenter,
I believe.
No.
Century 21.
Thank you.
Century 21 reality.
Yep.
Next thing you know, he's okay.
Okay, I'm done with dinner, but read through a magazine.
See this one company out of Sunnydale, California.
First off, I went to my head.
Sunnydale.
All you got to do is change one letter and buffet.
Anyway, moving past it.
But anyone, and he's like, oh, cool.
They got some really cool war game kind of things going on.
No, no, something that'll change gaming forever.
Oh, yes.
Yes, thank you.
Thank you.
Closes this magazine, gets up with this plate.
Okay, I'm finished.
I'm going up to my room now.
Doesn't even say it.
Just does it.
Yeah, but just does.
Just as mom sits down and you realize that has literally put a rather thick layer of butter onto a piece of bread.
Picks up his corn and starts slathering it.
Hey, I, you know, that's a decent way to go about it.
But I got to give him that one.
Next thing, you know, he starts salting and salting and salting.
And all of a sudden, she's like, you know, I really worry about him sometimes.
Just about that point in time.
Dad bites in.
To the copper corn.
And all of a sudden, he's just going to look some blanks at her.
This corn is raw.
Yes, don't, don't you just love it.
You can just taste the nutrients and the vitamins A and D.
I'm sorry, but no.
Baby, you ever did that to me?
I would have to eat.
Well, don't you think she'd do it intentionally just so you would do such a thing to her?
Yeah, he can see the wheels of my attorney.
Yes, all of a sudden, the horns growing a little taller and the knee angle.
Hey, I'm looking back here at the tail.
It's just, yeah.
Oh, no, that's just hot.
That's what I, guys.
Is that a pitchfork in your hand?
No, it's a way for her to eat.
What do you think she eats with?
Oh, God.
Anyway, stop it.
You're going to turn them on and I'm not going to get home in time to take care of that before I have to pick kids up.
I mean, what?
Why do I think, you know, Shadow here is going to be driving.
He's still in here.
Shadow, can I tell you, flip the mirror up.
It's a big, very loud, you'll be okay.
He's still in, he's still in dear Godfuck.
No, not fuck him because of earlier.
Oh, shit.
Oh, God.
Anyway, anyway, anyway.
Back to the movie, all of a sudden goes up to his room and starts the war dialing.
Now, to explain what war dialing for those who might not know,
it was a simple technique of sitting there and dialing blocks of phone numbers at a time.
And a modem would give a specific sound,
so therefore you could easily go through and go,
this isn't the sound I was looking for, throw it out.
Next number.
Wait, this is something interesting.
I'll save it.
And war dialing has actually had a resurgence in recent years
because of the rise of void technologies.
Where with, you know, high speed bandwidth as it is,
you can cover an entire state in about a week or so,
depending on how big it is.
Yeah.
So it has seen a resurgence.
This is not dead technology, dead practices.
Exactly.
Well, that didn't also remember what we used to do all the time.
We were a little bit younger in the early 2000s.
Which I come to find out was called war driving,
which is basically taking out the computer.
It was, yeah.
Driving around until you find one that's unscured,
and hey, we got internet.
Some people just did it to find them.
I know people who had automated systems that would do it
and then upload it to websites,
but we digress past that.
But now that they've got that technology
that something that you can fit on your keychain,
will tell you where Wi-Fi hotspots are now.
Yeah.
It only tells you there's something there
that doesn't tell you any good information.
But then again, too, as Shadow found out earlier on this week,
or this weekend, I should say,
found out that there are some that can even block wireless signal.
Yeah.
But moving on, you know,
the next day we run it, run into them,
and she's like, you know, I've changed my mind.
Could you change my grade?
And they get back to his room and they start talking.
And he's like, well,
and he's got the war dialing going.
And she's like, is this going to take long, you know?
And isn't this expensive?
And he's like, there's ways around that.
No, he's not a hacker.
Well, no. Back then, it was not...
You couldn't say it was purely hacking.
It was a combination of hacking and freaking.
That's part of what war dialing was.
You know, playing with the phone systems.
Right.
So anyway, he's like,
I already changed your grade.
I figured, you know, you'd change your mind,
so I just changed it then.
She's like, what'd you give me?
D.
What?
You gave me a no, no, I'm kidding, I gave you.
And she smiles big and...
Yeah.
And he is so know this dude's getting late.
Sooner or later.
Yeah.
So...
Move on.
Next thing you know, he's going along
for some of the numbers he's logged.
And all of a sudden, he's like, hey, wait, okay, no, no.
This is a bank.
Hey, Pan Am!
Well, that's a bank.
Huh, that could come in useful later on.
Moving on.
Oh, Pan Am.
Where do you want to go?
And he books reservations.
He gets to Paris.
So I have tickets to Paris now?
No, no, no, you just have reservations for the flight.
Exactly.
Next thing he comes up and...
Oh, games.
List of games.
First one of...
No.
No, he comes to one that just says log on.
Oh, yeah.
Refuses to identify itself.
And he tries something...
connection terminates.
Try something else.
Connection terminated.
And he tries...
help games.
And it gives a list of games.
He tries something...
connection terminated.
Yep.
And now he...
you know, prints it out and goes and talks to some of his
other nerd friends.
One of which...
everybody has seen in either Revenge in the Nerds.
Revenge in Nerds Part 2.
Oh, yeah.
This dude just...
Yeah.
What for?
As skinny as a rail?
Uh...
Dear?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm sorry.
I have to give you a visual.
Okay, yes.
I stand six foot two and weigh 120 pounds.
Okay.
You're not a rail.
You're a railroad spike.
Get the sledgehammer.
I've got it tied to put down.
This...
Yeah.
But my husband's got hair down past his shoulders.
Anyway, anyway, anyway.
Sexy.
Yeah.
Sorry.
I have to say it.
Okay.
It's all good.
It's all good.
Anyway, next thing you know, he's like, okay.
But, um...
Anyway, like I said, six foot four, skinny as a rail.
The full button up front.
Short sleeve.
Checkered shirt.
Pants.
Uh...
Gray slacks hiked all the way up to his elbows.
Oh, yeah.
I mean, the big head...
I'm talking glasses that make two liters look thin.
Okay.
Oh, yes.
Erkle would be jealous.
Oh, yes.
And they start discussing his printout.
And they bring up the concept of a back door.
No, no.
Not the one you need toilet paper for.
Well, the one guy does.
And this guy...
It was the nerdy guy who, you know...
Well, he's the one who mentioned the back door,
but the guy who was elaborating on it.
I mean...
I won't say atypical.
This guy's...
A little longer hair a little bit past these years.
Maybe close to his shoulders.
Let's think of...
A few sets.
Comic book guy from Simpson's...
Except not so heavy.
Yeah, except not so heavy and not so nasty.
But definitely that kind of...
Yeah, overweight, spends all his time in his computer chair,
hooked up to, you know,
and his only interaction with the outside world,
is on an internet connection.
Now this...
Let's make it, you know, really clear.
This was pre-internet days.
Yeah, thanks.
This was your dialing machine to machine to BBSs.
You know, had porn been around,
maybe things would have been different for some of these guys.
I wanted to say, for what I understand, even back then,
you could still talk person to person, PC to PC,
but there was no video or anything like that.
It was just all text.
Yeah.
So, they, you know, explain what a back door is.
That it basically something the programmer puts in,
that no one else, but him knows about.
Security, vulnerability.
Exactly.
This is why I close source proprietary software sucks.
You don't know what's there.
All you know is what they tell you,
not what might be there.
So, he then proceeds a massive data hunt,
as he starts looking for information about Falkner's maze.
Yep.
Which leads him to Stephen Falkner,
and he starts just referencing all kinds of shit from this guy,
and uses different things in there to try to figure out
what the back door is.
And then, I've said,
she comes over one day after a nice long run,
where she's sweating slightly, you know,
that nice glowing machine on her.
And this must have been pre-sports broad day,
because she has a nice bounce going.
Yes, I am stuck with men watching.
Oh, come on.
We saw you looking and appreciating the bounce, too.
No.
But, if that's what little, you know,
a cream in your shorts fantasy,
you got to go on on.
You got to go along with that.
Hey, how'd you know I had a panic cream quorum right here?
It's cooked.
Yeah, exactly.
So we can't taste all the vitamin D and C.
So, I'm watching this movie with a bunch of people going,
oh, God, I'd so hit that.
Damn.
Did you ever hear me or...
Yes, I did.
Anyway.
If you weren't getting late before,
you sure as L.A. now.
Oh, she thanks, babe.
You.
But she goes up to his room.
And, you know, it starts talking to the suddenly other,
she walks in, she's like,
where have you been all week?
Have you been sick?
No, I've just, um, yeah.
As he's laying there in a paired pants,
no shirt,
and a pile of paper around him.
Fritz your paper everywhere.
Printer paper, notebook paper.
I mean, you name it, it's there.
Okay, I have to make a point, though.
I'm sorry, she rings the doorbell.
His dad answers the door.
Reading newspaper and he does barely looks up.
And, and she's like,
hi, is David here?
Oh, yeah, he's up in his room.
And, she just goes walking past him,
goes up to his room,
and I'm like,
wait a minute.
Hello, where did the whole,
may I come in?
Where did the whole,
I'm a parent,
that a very half-naked woman
just ran up to my son's.
That's not a good thing.
No.
Well, wait, wait,
the part you're leaving out is
it was the dad who let it happen.
Not the mom.
Exactly.
And, I'm sitting here going,
uh, to teach your parenting skills,
go out the window.
Yeah, sorry.
I've also got a member.
Back in those days,
it's the dad's pretty much saying,
yeah, my boy's finally becoming the man.
Uh, that and also,
you could tell,
so one of the things that these guys
are not pointing out was,
while she was running up the stairs,
he was looking very intently.
Oh, no.
He looked and then went right back
to his papers.
Oh, yeah, I forgot.
Never mind.
Two words.
Hussey went.
Yeah, very true, very true.
Yeah.
Besides, I doubt he was,
I doubt that old man was getting in anyway.
And,
third discussion with him,
her and him showing her
the video of Faulkner.
He pieces together
and tries,
oh, no, it can't be that simple.
Tries the name of Faulkner's
to see son Joshua.
Types it in.
Enter.
And he's in.
Welcome, Professor Faulkner.
And he, you know,
in another step of showing off,
shows a, you know,
text-to-speech system
that has the computer talking back.
I'm sorry.
I have to point out something.
The whole,
going through the whole,
oh, God.
Do you have a number for him?
He's kind of cute.
Uh, he's dead.
Oh.
Yeah.
She doesn't say,
that's about the number.
She asked,
oh, he's kind of, you know,
cute, attractive,
whatever.
Yeah.
And then he says something about,
he was old.
And she goes, he is that old.
He was 41.
Oh, yeah.
He's old.
My dad's 45.
My dad's 45.
And I'm like,
oh, God.
I'm 33.
I'm going to be 34 next month.
And I'm sitting here going,
yeah.
I get this and I put my back.
Our kids consider us fucking ancient.
Okay.
Yeah.
No kidding.
To us, we predate Yoda.
Predate Yoda.
Wow.
So, who did Yoda date after you, too?
Job time.
Yeah.
Feel my first deep within you, I was.
Feel the force.
Anyway.
Get the welding helmet.
We broke a brain.
We have to fix it.
Not anyway.
Anyway.
Anyway, anyway, anyway.
So, all of a sudden you,
boom, list of the games.
And back up.
We've got things like,
backgammon, chess,
biological, you know,
this and that and,
global,
thermonuclear war.
He types in global,
thermonuclear war.
Well, sudden,
computer comes up.
Dr. Falcon, wouldn't you rather play a nice game of chess?
Not right now.
And he proceeds to play a simulation of World War III
with Joshua.
Where?
Where?
He's like, what side should I choose?
Ah, let's be the Russians.
And just to explain a little more,
because the connection comes a little,
not much after this.
Joshua is the whopper.
Yes.
Now, plus.
Now, like we were saying with the,
or like, Lord the Rock and Blut,
and who was it again?
That you did Red Dawn with?
Dragon's Angel.
Ah, that's it.
This was a point in time
when literally the,
the red threat was really, really big.
I mean, the iron curtain was rough.
The perception of it, at least.
Still, but the iron curtain was up.
You know,
every time the Russians made a move,
we made a move.
Every time we made a move,
we made a move,
the Russians made a move.
It was just basically a large game of chess.
And...
Oh, come on.
It wasn't chess.
It was posturing, posing,
waving a patriotic cock around,
trying to prove who was bigger and better.
When coming to find out through everything,
China would, if China would have whipped out there,
at the time they would have whipped up most of our assets.
Only if they would have gone in for a purely ground war.
True.
So...
Yes, it's amazing how much we can remember
of the politics of things back in the 80s.
Anyway, so they start in,
who should we bomb first?
Los Vegas.
Yeah, that sounds good.
And that was Jennifer's idea.
And then they bomb Seattle.
And, you know, you could tell kind of hours pass
and dad yells up,
damn it!
How many times do I have to tell you to snap these lids on tight
because the dog is knocked it over and is digging through the trash?
Yep.
So he just cuts the connection.
Yep.
When the whole time,
next thing you know,
poof, next scene,
we're right back in the Orad.
No, we're...
This is actually between them in the Orad,
bouncing back and forth,
as they're freaking out.
That missiles are launching,
fighters are scrambling,
subs are launching,
and then as soon as he cuts connection,
it all goes off back to normal.
And everybody's doing that.
And then we cut, you know,
we'll just cut on to the next scene where,
in the next day,
he walks in from school
and, you know,
mom's all proud,
he's got passing grades.
Actually,
we're exactly where it was.
We're young, man.
I want you to come in here.
You have something very important.
She's got this somewhat
sternal look on her face,
picks up the mail,
pulls out your report card
for the semester,
just came in,
and you passed.
Big smile,
as he's all, you know,
you could tell,
if she was planning that,
as soon as she got it.
You've also got to remember,
he said,
okay, what I do this time.
Oh god, yes.
How many times have we said that,
people? Come on!
Come on!
Today's Monday.
I'm also talking about her listeners out there too.
I mean,
god only knows how many of them
are going to be listening to this going,
oh god.
I have no clue how many times I said that when I was a kid.
I have no idea how many more times I'll say it this week alone,
but...
Very true.
Very true.
Probably more often after this broadcast.
No.
Anyway,
next thing, you know,
you should like,
go show your phone,
go show your phone,
as he's sitting there,
reading the newspaper,
watching the news.
Okay, how in the world was this possible again?
And the thing...
I'm a multi...
I can multitask rather well,
but reading and listening to the news at the same time
is not one of the things I can multitask.
It's one of those,
what you do is you're reading something,
and your mind kind of processes in the background,
and goes,
this is something I should be paying attention to.
Yeah, true.
So,
and Dad may not have been...
Dad seems like he's more content reading,
mom probably had the TV on for herself.
Yes, true.
And it cuts over to the news story,
where it says for about three minutes,
we were almost at World War III,
because of a computer glitch.
Yeah.
And he freaks.
He's freaking as it's going,
and he goes upstairs.
Gotta go to my room now, now, now.
And Jennifer calls him,
because the phone starts ringing up there,
as part of what he used as his excuse.
And he gets up there,
and she's like,
are you listening to the news?
Yeah.
Do you think this has anything to do with us?
Yeah, I think it might.
Yeah, I'm...
Okay.
And then,
the phone keeps ringing back,
again and again.
And it's dial tone.
Well, dial...
Remember, he does it the first time,
it's dial tone, so he's like,
okay, why the hell not?
Let's see what happens.
Yeah.
Put it on to the set.
Turns on his computer,
and all of a sudden,
boom, it's Joshua.
Saying what you like to continue the game.
Or actually, say,
the game has not ended.
Yep.
And wants to finish the game.
It looks like you want to say something there, shadow.
Three hours,
some odd minutes,
some odd seconds.
Right then,
as soon as that was said,
in my personal opinion,
he should have just
clung up the phone
and disconnected everything.
Well, that's pretty much what he did.
But then, again,
later on,
pan back to NORAD,
everybody's going,
hey, shit, trying to figure out
what the fuck's going on,
coming to find out it was just the computer glitch.
But somebody hacked it.
They figured it out.
Somebody hacked it.
And,
then it came from,
they localized it to,
uh,
Seattle, Washington.
I'm sorry, but...
Well, look.
For storyline,
yeah, they cut a lot of ground
between that and them,
finding him.
Well, no,
I think I was wanting to make mention of this.
Hello.
Seattle, Washington.
The home of Grunge Rock.
Living in a place
where it rains,
93% of the year,
I would be excessively depressed.
Not hacking computers.
Yep.
And so,
on this scene,
he walks out
and there's a guy in a suit
with a wire going up to his ear.
He starts walking this way.
Another guy,
a suit,
he starts walking.
Yeah,
turns starts walking
another way,
van pulls in front of him.
And they,
you know,
they come his rights
and take him off
to Noret.
I'm sorry,
but,
okay, going from Seattle,
Washington, Noret,
which is in the
Rocky Mountains, Colorado.
Come on.
If this,
with as much urgency as behind it,
you don't think they couldn't have gotten them there
in a couple hours.
Very true.
Anyway.
But they're questioning
and the question,
next thing in a book,
back into the conference,
the general,
the scientists,
the senator,
kind of looking guys,
and they're doing the whole,
how the hell could this
kid do this?
He's Gotta be working with someone.
He's Gotta be working with somebody,
bulbable,
all of a sudden,
the main scientist guy
blue beret
got a mustache going
talking with the nurse trying to you know smooze his way and no no this was
that wasn't yet
well he was trying to smooze when the guy what when doctor mcintrick won walked up
and he's okay okay got to get serious now
and you know mcintrick's you know walks in david's there in cuss all these aren't
needed
come talk with me you know let's go with my office it'll be more comfortable
smoke a circle guy yeah you can definitely tell this was back in the day
when you could smoke them you're anywhere you want to do
yep
i miss those days sometimes
but you know he's
who are you working with blah blah blah
and something comes up
and he goes leaves his office leaving him in front of a terminal
okay i'm sorry but
if i'm
questioning somebody in norad guess what i'm not gonna let him get anywhere near
computer
especially not when he's been accused of being a computer hacker they got
into a military
computer by a backdoor they didn't even know existed exactly yeah that's the
fun thing we find out this backdoor was a
mistake in routing of a phone number basically yes a mistake that they're
blaming not only on the kid but also
on the phone company yeah the kid found it but the phone company screwed up
screwed the pooch next thing you know
they gotta have somebody to blame exactly but next thing you know he's standing
there watching them talk when all of a sudden he leads down and as
Lorddruckham blue here put it you just can't resist you can't resist nope
you definitely cannot resist take it take it take it take it take it take it
hello dot uh... hello mr falcon or dr falcon
uh...
and this is a point in time where the computer lets him know that it's been
searching for him
and he is not at his uh... register
he has classified address register that he can't reach him at that address
oh that's true and then it brings up his uh... fake name as well as his
real name and an address
like he retarded
the secretary spots him playing on this computer and was down
in crime security and up comes
Tolkien's character who played Strickland and yes he's bald still just like they
asked in back to the future three
he's still bald
and
you know him and two you know goons for lack of a better to drag them back to the
infirmary throw them in lock them in saying the FBI will be along you know it
you'll be charged with treason uh... no fb and i yes
yes yes oh no no i gotta talk to dr uh... whatever the fuck his name is
josh was still playing the game yeah yeah yeah and nobody's listening to him
of course nobody listens to it
but of course then again that's the u.s military back in them days
are you getting even now if you were expected of it
you know suspected of espionage yeah you'd get treated the same way i mean
forgive me but god only knows how many of our listeners have possibly been picked
up by the fbi as possible uh... internal terrorists
yeah so
yep alright what's the next scene the next scene
is him managing to break his way out and this is a you know
he basically takes a micro recorder connects it
to the internal wiring for the number pad and gets the guy to punch it in
and records it and plays it back okay this i will say right now
is probably one of the impact more improbable things a lot of the stuff that
happens in this movie is pretty probable in my eyes
this one not so much yeah it most of those it actually dealt with actually
pressing the uh... actual buttons not the tone of the button
and that number can be decoded because it was just touched on and apparently
that number is two two two three three three
oh my god
back to the security thing again guys now wait wait you're just talking about
tones being played for our benefit
so
and he gets out and man it starts to walk down the hallway because he slides past
the security guard who's schmoozing on the woman trying to get her
hands and he comes in the elevator comes and stops right where he's
and also he's screaming and door opens he's gone
they walk by as you see the elevator maintenance
door shut and he's going through it starts crawling through these
rolling around rolling around next thing you know he ends up
back in the war room right behind a freaking uh...
staircase and basically through all of this he manages to walk right out the
front door step on a bus and get a ride right out
why because there was a fucking tour group
i'm sorry but
now the bus did say us a f
so the fact that these may have been
enlisted
personnel
what i understand they were civilians
well
either way you know
anyway anyway
but ends up in some backwater Colorado
and he calls jenifer
i need money for a plane flight so i can get to organ so i can you know blah blah blah
and he gets you know to organ and she shows up too
who are you doing how do you get here three-hour drive
and they are off to find falconer and they get to falconer
and the first thing you see is a freaking teradactal
yes it's a teradactal of about four-foot wide wingspan just so on a
and all of a sudden damn near rugs and two of the lower
remote control glider folks shaped like a terad
and they explain to you know falconer what's going on
what the stakes are and he starts going off about how the dinosaurs just
kind of went extinct one day and we're going that way too
okay and was it jenifer who challenged him saying
no no it was david saying i've seen videos of you you didn't use to be like
what was the last thing you cared about
and all of a sudden a off in the distance
um sorry but uh the both of you seem to have missed the last fairy um
you're welcome to stay the night um and would you guys like to sleep on the
floor tonight as he's walking up the stairs and they just walk and david's like
screw this let's go we're we've got a no we have to point out the part where
this guy basically says that he's within three miles of the closest nuclear
target yeah and so when nuclear warfare does break out
they're going to be dead instead of wandering around blind trying to figure out
what the fuck happened just a microsecond just a millisecond of bright light and
poof we're vaporized and we're going to be spared the pain of survival
and that's the part where you know they leave
and they're you know thrashing out long in the dark
and then a helicopter shows up and david's like
that bastard he turned us in and then you hear Faulkner's voice
over a loudspeaker saying get in
beep alab's time nine hours 23 minutes some odd seconds
and now we cut to them sprinting up in an old
willy's jeep yep why because all of a sudden boom next thing you know
income inbound targets that does it they got get we've got guarantees here
this is all live go to defcon one and they are locking down the mountain
and i'm just wanting to know where the hell they got the military dude that was
driving the jeep i mean where the hell do they pick this dude um i would
imagine that there is a checkpoint low yeah on the mountain exactly and
another one higher so you have to cut you know for that service road you had to
go through to believe me when i say this i've actually been in not inside inside
norad but i've been up on that mountain
when i was a lot younger my everybody mostly knows that my dad was a long
whole truck driver and we actually delivered some
goods up there that basically we got up there they full security we were up
there between the moment we arrived and back the trailer up to the
dock to the moment we left we were up there 12 hours
because that was that much goddamn security
and the guy driving the gate is closed he just
guns it hits it and i give the guy credit that he manages to keep it under
control because of willies has a narrow wheel base a short wheel base
those things are known and prone to flip and tip
he slams through ends up sliding sideways slightly runs a guardrail for
probably maybe 20 feet bending the shit out of that guardrail
hits another Jeep and ends up turning it over
somewhat kind of caddy corner onto its side for the most part
and then they make a mad dash into the mountain
right as the five foot thick metal door i swear this thing is probably got to be
24 tall it's a 10 foot eight clearance inside the door oh that's right yeah
yeah 10 foot eight five foot thick i mean
Jesus Christ people and if you know what these doors
were meant for and what they do when we heard that door shut all the way and
click it was clunk clunk clunk clunk clunk
five rocking pins on it every side and we all just kind of
yeah you know shutters were just kind of oh god
because everybody knows in a situation like that door that thick that heavy
was meant to withstand nuclear blast and nuclear radiation and if it's
closing like that they're not expecting to open it anytime real soon yeah
and you know what would you say this is a pretty good place to leave it
leave because this is the last 20 minutes or so and this is where it all
kicks up and we really yeah but trust me want to say this people by that
point here on the back of my neck stand it's straight off i'm going oh god oh god
oh god yeah all right final thoughts at this point
um to be perfectly honest those who are too young to remember though that
point in time in uh uh us history so and so forth if you want a movie that
really digs you in deep and basically makes you go oh dear god this could
actually happen even today watch this movie trust me and it also
is one of the more realistic and accurate depictions of hacking in a movie
that ever happened oh yes
any thoughts from the other two i would say even for those of us that are old
enough to remember this movie it's great to watch it again because there are
so much you you really do not remember oh yeah and then
watching it all over again great kick of nostalgia
i'm sorry oh oh watching those two you know watching uh uh
alie cd and and Matthew Broderick at that age is just like oh wow
and also the one going back a little bit that one scene where they're
getting where they're doing the war game bombing Seattle and vegas and
they're both over sitting there with aluminum tab
pull tab cans nostalgia right there
yep shadow
and all honesty this is a movie that i would recommend to
everyone yeah if you like suspense and action pack this is the movie to see
now okay now let's hit the rating shadow we'll
we'll let you go after wolf and nightchild so you can get idea how we do it
but i paid nine ninety nine for this movie nine dollars and 99 cents
cut tax no remember we don't worry about the tax that's right that's right
you know this one slid under the wire to be a TBR
and we've got a couple plan folks that hit the marked dead on in the future
so let's start with nightchild here out of nine dollars and 99 cents what
would you say the value of this movie is oh i'd give it all of that plus some
i this is one of those movies i i've searched for those great nostalgia
movies from the 80s that i love and i've seen them online for 40 or
fifty dollars and you know my budget doesn't allow for it but i would say it's
completely worth it so worth every penny worth every penny and then some
all right wolf i'm honestly going to have to concur nine dollars ninety nine
cents i'd say add about three four bucks to it
it's easily worth close to fifteen do you have an idea of how the ratings working
that you know we're not giving it one star out of tenor you know it's like that
you know if you think that you know eight bucks is a fair price for this nine
dollar ninety nine cents movie that's how you'd rate it
shadow but what you know out of nine ninety nine how much would you say this is
worth i would i would definitely have to concur with wolf
definitely i would i would pay every cent
and more for this movie now i don't completely disagree but there's just a
few things that seem out of place about this one
maybe it's my slight jadedness but the fact that this movie was re-released as a
twenty-fifth anniversary collection just because of war games the dead
code kind of doesn't sit well with me
but i can more or less move past that you know the subtitles are there
everything's pretty much there i would have liked some a liner just something
you know a little bit of art a little you know maybe some computer history in
there it felt like for me as much as you know i like this movie
there's just one or two small things they could have done that would have
you know been well worth it so in the end i'm just going to say nine eighty
because it just missed the mark at you know nine ninety nine
but i can't completely gripe either
so all right and as always we'd look you know like to thank you all for
listening oh yeah you can our website is ten-buck-review.net
you can email us at ten-buck-review at gmail.com
you can follow us on twitter as ten-buck-review
now something i want to bring up to the listeners
we've got some financial situations and issues going on around here
and in a couple months we are looking at potentially losing our
web hosting and i would like to ask the listeners
if you could and i hate doing this but if you could help donate to keep us going
for another year as we get you know or even to help us pay for the next
couple months we'd appreciate it oh hell yes
now i i yes i may not be able to get to do this very often but when i do
i absolutely fucking love it and the other thing i'll say is
i don't know what we're gonna do yet but you know i'm sitting sitting here
planning and i'm gonna bring it up with you know everyone else
that the people who you know help donate help support us
to get us through we're gonna figure out something that as soon as we can
to help repay that kindness oh hell yes you know we'll come up with something
special for the you know those people oh yeah
you know and i hate to ask like this but if it weren't for the situations as
they were you know if situations were different we wouldn't be asking
now the final thing i have to say is i have special permission from the
artist to play the closing track we have
everyone here has heard it and the track is by a group called dual core i have
permission by int 80 who is the man who does the lyrics for this
and our closing track tonight is war games
about the water
well we want to spend all time thinking about world war three
twenty-four hours a day three hundred fifty five days a year
but at the end of the year we have the war game
i have done the duty of it
war game war game war game war game
this is why two caveman challenged in the war game
war game war game war game
i see the ends with the distance of war right war game war game war game
grouply submarines by the jet war plane war game war game war game
third war issue kicking down war frame
in from the start when computers had tubes
i don't mean the internet's the real vacuums
the diodes are relayed shoot for the moon
just one system build a whole room
and dance back then to write plenty tracks
a type of colossus exact any act back in the 50s before they had helped
i a i deceived even to ring himself
had a conversation that made his brain numb
where did you think the current test came from
and he complete that's my problem that to a language
destroy your process go through the years
the outtake humans cross-graded davis to stop my new man
of data circuitry and group designs
my most things in life i got better with time
war game war game war game
this is why two caveman challenged in the war game
war game war game war game
i see the ends with the distance of war right
war game war game war game
grouply submarines by the jet war plane
war game war game war game
third war issue kicking down war frame
more and more systems when i'm giving the time
pushing my way over arbonnet lines
came out the military moving commercial
pursuing consumers computers now personal
they put me in movies created the buzz
but still they don't see what i'm capable of
hackers attacked did you miss the news exaggerate
thanks to the miscome shoot let's play a game
die on my floor man is global thermo
nuclear war pack rabbit some blue shots man is my angle
the da Vinci virus to capsize tankers
march fortunes made his small amounts take a fraction
of a penny out of everyone's account
buy your financial smoke i can come up with the
upload a virus and infect the mothership
war game war game war game
this is why two caveman challenged in the war game
war game war game war game
i see the ends with the distance of war
range war game war game war game
grouply submarines by the jet war planes
war game war game war game
third war issue kicking down war frame
global employment for clients with patients
a new application human surveillance
echelon in the set analyze evidence of
this car to relevance of signal intelligence
looking for a flash of light in the black and
light passing by to satisfy when i'm packing
by a satellite out of commission pushed to
its afterlife i'm the reason carnivore lost
its whole appetite feel so unbreakable
crush those bones more down more files
touch tone phones frequency bounded for how
the might sound if you improve your instincts
for how 9,000 packers could break in
and exploit the site so we blast off the
new sound among the ground siloes
but it's the bus beats the fastest
the plot goes also
who for for for for for for for
game war game war game war game
this is why two caveman challenged in the
war game war game war game war game
i see the ends with the distance of
war range war game war game war game
grouply submarines fight a gentle or plain
war game war game war game
third warning issue kicking down for a break
war game war game war game
the war was born out in the state from war game
war game war game war game
the war was born out in the state from
inside the state from
Well played, well played, super play, more games
Thank you for listening toHacker believers Radio
For more information on the show and how to contribute your own shows visit hackerpublicradio.org
For more information visit hackerpublicradio.org
