Episode: 1067
Title: HPR1067: echo 01 > /dev/random
Source: https://hub.hackerpublicradio.org/ccdn.php?filename=/eps/hpr1067/hpr1067.mp3
Transcribed: 2025-10-17 18:29:55

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So let's start with this mess, yeah, I don't know.
We don't even have PayPal yet.
We have four people.
How is that not enough?
Yep.
I was going to say that's one more than we had for the first show because we don't have
crayons.
Crayons not going to be here.
There's no way he's going to be here.
Let's say we have four people last time.
He's busy doing his researches of Greece.
All right, so fuck it.
When it's starting anything, we're just going to keep talking and then we'll put some
audio out there and nobody will really know where it began, okay?
No.
Yes.
Is anybody, is this stream in anywhere?
Is it just self-contained on the monitor?
It's self-contained.
We don't have a stream.
Wait, I don't understand.
They added recording to mumble and what do you use recording in mumble for other than
podcasts.
But you have to set up the really screwed up pulse audio redirect crap for streaming.
Need to be able to save real time.
Mumble was initially designed to be like an add-on for video games so that people could
talk to each other.
Yes.
So mumble is how you get Leroy Jenkins.
Yeah.
Actually, they originally do it with a ventrilo.
I'm going to choke you, Pegel.
But I scream Leroy Jenkins every chance I get.
You shut up.
You shut up.
You shut up.
No, you shut up.
Oh yeah.
Really?
No attacks on my attempt to mimic, Pegel?
Oh, I missed it.
We all talk.
They'll be right again.
Fine.
Fine.
It's not going to happen again.
Fuck all these.
But what does anybody use the recording in mumble for other than podcasts?
Like who records their gaming matches in World of Warcraft?
Leroy Jenkins.
I get what?
Yeah.
Probably is somebody.
Shut up, Sandy.
Very stammer.
Why can't we stream from mumble, dammit?
I think the office of mumble just didn't realize how useful this thing has become, how
much more wide use it is.
You know, I think you could, and I was prepared to do this for the year on New Year's Eve
show.
But I think you could stream from mumble if you just use two machines in a physical
cable between them.
Yeah.
No, you can't.
You can't.
That's how.
No, I don't think that's quite how they do it.
They use, who is it that does the, is it, is it Asimeth?
Does the stream...
Oh, it's Jay Lindsay.
Does the fear...
Yes.
I think he just has a client logged in that actually is using that pulse re-director to...
Yeah.
Yeah, you cut away bad there, sound chasing.
Yeah.
I think, I think all that Jay Lindsay does is he has, he, what, basically he logs a mumble
client into, into the server that actually is, uses pulse audio to redirect the output
to streaming software, streaming server.
So he doesn't have no extra, he doesn't, he doesn't have no extra wires or anything.
Yeah, it's using jack.
I don't know if he, I don't think so.
I think he just uses pulse.
I think he just has a pulse set up to do it.
All the instructions I've found have a pulse set up.
Because, because tight man, he figured it out with jack and he had to have a, the specially
compiled version of, I think of mumble even, and then also of ice cast maybe.
So they were both jack aware and then he's got him, he's got him look together to jack.
But I think he's the only person on the planet who's figured that out in the literally.
Well, and I think he did that before everybody else tried to mess around with it.
So he, he kind of blazed the trail for a long time, yeah, he kind of blazed the trail
for us.
Oh, well, I actually just go on Peggy, but I was thinking about doing was, I can't remember
the name of it right now, but there's actually a front end to do all that for Jack.
It's a graphical front end.
It's not a jack control.
There's actually another one though that is just for connecting everything like that.
And it's, it's all pretty and nice.
But I was thinking of hooking like VLC to mumble through Jack, just so I can play like promos
and stuff at the end or if we wanted to start playing songs or whatever.
Yeah, there are instructions for streaming into mumble as well as streaming out of mumble.
They're, they're all really big hacks though.
We should, yeah, should probably just submit feature requests or try and get somebody to
add that functionality to the open source software that we're using.
Yeah, that's, that's the only one showing another physical cable.
Well, the other thing about this is that really mumble is not designed to handle things
like music and stuff like that.
It's really designed for voice transmission because it's, yeah, but they're not in
and ke multitool mode.
Yeah, shut up, Sandy.
Yeah, we said instead.
Never going to happen peg,
absolutely.
Hi, everybody and welcome to Dev Random.
I'm peg, wall with me tonight.
If you're out, stay here and you hope.
I was like wait, that was a good impression. I like that
Except I would go a little differently
And Sandy and I probably wouldn't have laughed right with the top of you
Now it's fine. I didn't mind it
Okay
This discussion is too meta
Okay, let's not get back to that
Yeah, I think if we were as well as whole show started
If we were on sack overflow, we'd be getting our topic closed by Jeff
All right, so now that you've started the show peg, well, thank you for that. Are there some show notes? Do we have some order?
Some topics
Yeah, I'm not in charge of that one to ask your man and tear it there
You got some show notes and some topics
Nobody sent me the show note hat this week
You're the one that has like 200 tabs open of new stories. You just became the show notes
Yeah, all right, so give me a minute. I'll find one to talk about
No, dude, dude, I did I sent you the show note hat. It's gonna be 10 to 15 businesses
So I'm gonna be I'm gonna be the the show note bitch in like
The third episode from today
Well, no, no, it's starting today. Just know the hat is common if you really have to make a little paper one for the time being
a little and write dunce on it
Now don't don't try changing tabs in Firefox with you can you with your control key press down because that's just bad
Oh, I tried that earlier today and we're doing an hpr show and it just it screwed me all up
I fucking hate how there's no key on the keyboard anywhere that just doesn't do anything
What about the windows key maybe scroll lock
But that's like all the way over over here. I don't want to do that
Caps lock is anyone ever used that for anything?
Oh
But then when you type it's a bitch just unlink it for caps lock. You don't use caps lock. Do you?
Yes, that's a good point. Why not?
So I'll just I'll just be 10 to 15 minutes. Well, I saw this shit out
Can I can I tell a really embarrassing story while you're doing that? Yes
Okay, so um I do in IRC
uh
Sent me a motherboard
From overseas from like uh
She's where was even at with the Nordic countries, you know way up north in Europe
You know because he knows I like reuse old hardware because it's fine. I don't buy stuff and
I've been trying to put this computer together for like I mean literally it's probably going on two months now
Just because I didn't have enough pieces in there. I didn't have any um
You know built in it didn't have any onboard video. So I had to get a video card for it
And didn't have any um a PCI express card put in there and then I ordered a case specially for it because all my cases that I have that I like
seem to be cursed every computer I put in doesn't work
Yeah, you know build stuff that was working before I got it in there and put it in there and it stops working
So I bought a case for it and everything and nothing fit because this uh um
It's a uh a
Bottom-mounted power supply in this case. So I had to get a power supply too
I've just been you know collecting parts and putting them to get it for a lot and I finally got this thing together
I know that I could test it and uh and I plugged the power cord into it
And I put the power switch on and the power supply and hit the power button
And there was just nothing like it wasn't getting any power whatsoever and uh and it was pretty pretty hard
Because I've been waiting to put this thing together for so long
And uh you know finally got the deal in it and while we were talking here
I looked over um because I had I unplugged the power cord and I pulled it up and put it next to it
And in order to kind of look over to power cord and I realized it's um the power cord that I use for building computers
I you know keep them grounded so I have the uh the power lead clipped off
I need one of those that's a fricking brilliant idea
When you just have to know which which lead is power and clip that one off so that it never you know gets it from the mains
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's that's excellent
But yeah, so this computer may well work and I have no idea because I I used my uh my build power cord for it
That is a very funny story
Yeah, so I'm hoping now I got my fingers crossed and if this thing will work it's really pretty it's a nice case
But you're not supposed to be listening or laughing you're supposed to be getting our show notes together
Okay
Well apparently the hobbit is underwhelming because it's filled filmed at 48 frames per second
Instead of the industry standard 24 frames per second
What the hell is wrong with that that seems like a good thing
Yeah, but it plays back in slow
Oh really what if you play it back at 28 frames a second yeah
I was like what does he mean
He's screw you okay. I can't believe I felt the bad god damn it. Sorry
Well if you if you watch the Lord of the Rings and those movies won't really slow with all that
If you watch the extended cuts
I would like to watch the version or make the version if it doesn't exist
We're all of the flute music
Frodo looking sad is cut out of it and I think it would be like 35-minute series
See he said something about the hobbit and I automatically went was he talking about me
What do we do do you have a hairy feet piggy?
I do and I grow that's our secret I grow a
I'm a short little man
You haven't afro
Well none of the moment, but I grow one yes
Not where you can see it
I believe I believe that that's called a merkin
No, a merkin is a wee big wig
Yeah, it's actually a really I thought a merkin was a too big afro
No, I'm gonna say it has the people in this show know that
He is everybody new
Yeah, well I have to admit I did not know that so the real
No, that was part of being an American a few years ago when we were also supposed to hate
Well, was it a rack at the time I forget
What did a rockies wear a lot of merkins? Yeah, I don't know this one is where merkins
What yeah see I don't know whether to believe him
Well, you you don't have to believe me because I don't know if it's true or not, but the story that I got is that
In certain areas of the world where people get you know body lights and fleas and that kind of thing they shave all their hair off
To so they don't have like fleas and stuff, but they'll put that merkin back on your cinnamon. It looked like they're bald
I was actually very popular to do during the the plague era
because
prostitutes also back then would wear them to hide
Signs of SDD's like sores and whatnot. So today you learn something. Oh my god. Okay
Peggy note for editing
As you see I my time is wrong because I'm as I started in summer recording, but when you are editing
This right here the past five or so minutes of discussion. We'd be cutting that out
That is educational. It was on the history
This is I mean this is good stuff here. This is this is this brain podcasting
We're gonna get bought by these covers. We start talking about more of this shit
I mean this is the kind of stuff that that has to get out there
Okay, I'm sorry for fritter right now. Hey, Sandy. What the fuck
So it looks like you can get them at beautyselect.com
That's
To get them a so crowed. They got a pink careful wish one
They seem to run about 40 bucks a piece and it's pretty obvious which ones are male in front of the male
I think we can make an investment
This seems that seems rather expensive 40 bucks. Jesus come on. What kind of hair is that? Oh listen if it's part of your business
It's a write-offs. Don't worry about that
I just had the greatest idea ever of how to sell these things we market them towards competitive swimmers
Ah
Don't have those funky suits. No, they don't need that shit. That went right over my head
Oh, because they shave everywhere. The swimmers. Yeah, they used to shave everywhere whole body shaving
Yeah, I get that but if they wear this thing and then put on their bathing suit, it's just gonna poke through, isn't it? No
Suggesting that they should be wearing them when they're not swimming
Yeah, you know for the downtime
All right now I get
For the downtime or more like for their uptide, maybe
Yeah
You know if you put one of these things on and then jump in a pool, you know
The shrinkage is just gonna be
Terrible it's gonna hide it completely
Now we're going to sign felt territory come on we get droppies
This is to make the trees look larger, but I you know, I don't know why they do that
This is the shows wow poke you removed completely from HPR
It's gonna get different to remove completely from HPR
So I have it a hobby or once I have not used one curse word or brought up one inappropriate topic
We've been swearing like fucking troopers over here
Yeah, I had to remind them that since the show does actually go out on HPR we can swear quite liberally if we want to
And I actually reminded them that actually came up during the New Year's Eve
HPR episode. Oh, you don't have to remind me that was that was one of the funniest things I'd ever heard
With the 69 Joe
Well, it was the oh what we can swear on here and everybody started swearing all at once pretty much
Oh, no, uh
Mrs. Mrs. White Fang made that 69 Joe and I felt a lot of my chair
Yeah, that was uh, that was priceless
Where was this in the New Year's HPR episode?
Oh, right, right, I don't think I've seen that either. I need to watch that too. There's like eight parts to it. Listen
listen
So okay, so the the hobbit story clearly didn't catch on um
um
Mein Kampf is to be republished in Germany discuss
I thought that was illegal over it. Yeah, I heard it. Is it being released in German?
Maybe it's a loophole where if they release it in a different language, it's uh somehow
allowable that that's yeah, it sounds such a good idea. Oh, in 2015 it will publish Mein Kampf
Oh, and it's the barrier
And
Well, maybe I have they actually reach a point where they've decided they need to learn from their own history
So apparently it looks like because it's been it's been banned there's a whole lot of
like rumor and mystery surrounding it and
pretty much just hearsay has just
Sort of taken over all kind of rational thought regarding this book so they can release it to put all that to rest
All right, on so it's like the uh the prison keeper from aliens when we do the rumor control
Yeah, sorry, that was probably a far-fetch
No, that went over my head is I don't I've never really watched those films
Oh, no, he would whenever anything happened to do would collect everybody around and say this is rumor control
Here's what actually happens. So he was just he was keeping rumors from spreading in and in a little panic from ensuing
So kind of the same thing. Oh
Okay, so apparently Steve Jobs was um recommending that
Mac OS 9 be ad-supported he wanted an ad-supported variant of OS 9
My god, they filed a they filed a patent on it in 2009
Yeah, but he got it. Haven't you seen the iPhone?
He kept it tuned the iPhone cost the shitload of money for you to watch those ads wait wait wait pegwall said speaking up
Speaking of Steve Jobs actually one kind of nifty thing he was going to do
Is he had the idea of like in the one millionth
iMac produced he was going to put a golden ticket in the box and even dresses will he
haha
I'm dead serious and when someone got that ticket he was going to actually give them a personal tour of apples dresses willyWanca
But just switch really wonka the journey debt wily wonka or the um I would have totally wonk and beat him to death whether
I'm gonna guess the gene wilder willy Wonka
while the one guy yes excellent you know the good one I yeah just just just
while we're here fuck Tim Burton I'm tempted to see dark shadows hey I have a
suggestion for a dev random game by the way that's here this this reminds me of
it and I'm stealing it from a from a radio show I heard a long time ago but you
can put together like a pop culture quiz and just ask you know random dudes
who come on this show because like for me you guys mentioned timber I know
clue who that is but I think also like platoon would be great on the other end
of such a quiz oh that sounds like that sounds like wait wait don't tell me he
knows movies and stuff no I just mean pop culture I don't mean new stuff I mean
no yeah wait wait don't tell me they'll actually get like celebrities and
stuff to come on yeah yeah specifically yeah I'll specifically choose
something that these celebrities won't know anything about to try to quiz
them on yeah yeah I guess I guess it's similar in that way but you just
specifically pop culture it's it's I don't know because people talk about
stuff like that all the time I have no clue what the hell you're talking about
and I'm sure it would be amusing to somebody but I mean I'm just it's
like Tim Burton means absolutely nothing to me it's so unimportant to me yeah
what you guys are talking about and my kids do it to me all the time talking
about you know they're their favorite singers and their favorite shows and
just nothing to blame well that that's you know that's something that's been
happening to me it's like okay so I'm real big in music on that but since I've
really gotten out of the gotten away from most of the commercial releases
90% of the stuff out there just doesn't mean anything to me you know it's like
the only thing I for okay so last albums I've heard that have actually been of
any use in the commercial world um Wilco's lead a style which was last year
and now Jack White has a new album out anything else I don't know I don't have
no people are either yeah I don't know this has
uh sandy thinks is in the mainstream but it's really not the close I can come
from mainstream music if I think about like like CDs like the CDs that I own
I think probably the newest CD that I own would be um and and you know that's
like I bought you know it's a real authentic CD is probably primus hey don't
laugh I don't know what that is either oh yeah I know I love primus I just mean
but when was the last time they released an album I don't even know that was
probably 15 years ago yeah I think the last time they released wasn't was in
thing I want to say 1998 wow I'm worse than all of you I don't know who any of
these people that you just mentioned how old are you 24 yeah you wouldn't
probably know who primus is I'm a year older than him and I know
I'm a year older than him and I know okay how old are you because we're gonna
I'm gonna embarrass a shit out of myself here well go on bump okay how old I
just turned 35 sorry my wife was asking me something I'm either here all right I'm
45 so I've been around a bit longer and so I know most of this stuff and I you
know what here's the thing the last CD I bought was actually this is good
negative land now the reason I buy a negative land and I bought it in a UCD store
so I did not buy new but these guys actually are very much all about ripping off
other artists and other people and basically screwing with copyright stuff so
that's the last CD I bought I'll tell you what the next thing I go to find and I
really got to find the gray out because I haven't heard that yet I have never heard
that either I would like to hear that I keep hearing things about it but you
know the thing about that is every time you hear a lot about something it's a
real letdown when you actually hear it yeah but what I get here is not people
saying oh it's so awesome it's great I keep hearing people say it was a really
important stepping stone yeah and that's that that makes it more interesting it
does because that by definition means it's creatively unique and and that's you
know a lot of times that's what I'm into for music that's like I bought this a box
of the hip hop stuff like three or four years ago and the whole reason I bought it
was not because I was into hip hop or anything like that but because there are
milestones in there that actually really kind of cracked the whole evolution of
how copyright is being handled in the US you can hear from the early days where
some of these artists were taking and sampling things and reworking them to later
periods are they basically were being shot down in terms of using stuff and
actually you know using samples and then I mean to come up with different stuff
and kind of trace the whole history through that oh so you're talking about
early early hip hop like rap like the early days of the 90s and late 80s and
using stuff okay yeah yeah in the back to the grandmaster flash and and oh
bombaza oh cool yes that was like late 70s grandmaster flash that was
that was for even I started listening to rap yeah late 70s to early 80s where it
starts it was old Tommy boy stuff yeah I don't know Tommy boy but I mean I grew
up in the 80s and I grew up on rap so I mean that was like that was my my music
so I'm really thrilled nowadays with nerd for that's like back to roots
I love me some Optimus rhyme oh man Optimus rhyme is incredible like I was awesome
there's so I just heard just discovered Dr. awkward that guy's pretty good too
I have not listened to that one I'm gonna have to give that a listen
Dr. awkward school and there's a dude who I haven't even heard any of his own
stuff but I've heard him on other people like featuring there's a dude named
Kavuto the python who's got just such a cool unique voice and I hope
didn't like his own stuff as as good as what he's on with other people
honestly my favorite hip-hop artist is Del the funky homo sapien or you might
also know him as Delteron yeah I don't know him at all I don't know him either way it's
all right you know I don't know who any of these people uh well how about
well see that's one that's one of these has kind of happened with with with this whole
shift in in terms of um music and culture stuff being much more in line oriented is
there is no real good way to find this stuff now you know you guys just listed off several
artists that I mean I've heard one or two references to like Optimus rhyme I've never
actually heard Optimus rhyme so I have to go do that he is so good do we live on the same
fucking planet no because you live in Australia yeah you're in Australia that's the whole
different world man well okay do you like rap at all well no in fitness no I'm not a
friend of rap but I don't I would go find Optimus rhyme yeah then I wouldn't worry about it he
don't like rap then don't bother but um I gotta say my favorite my favorite rapper right now is
MC front a lot I mean now it's probably like oh my god somebody I've heard of yeah right like
that's like he's almost mainstream in this conversation look like here's what here's what we'll do
okay you go listen to all these people and the rest of us will go listen to slim dusty
I would love another person whose name I recognized that I've no idea what he sings
um waltzing Matilda zero project after this he's saying it's a good version of waltzing Matilda
I was gonna say if I knew it five minutes ago it was a good joke peg wall I just I wish I got it
so back at the point Tim Burton is the douchebag that butchered um Charlie in the chuck of factory
and what was the Alice in Wonderland yeah so we hate him well but you know before that but you
know let's give him some chops so before that he didn't nightmare before Christmas
which was actually really really good hi bro shes and there were Christmas come on
come on Jack Skellington what the f just oh my god break his little fully exposed neck and
good riddance all right
yes I was again every time you guys get back to the point I'm lost
poke or um peg wall that's the name of the episode every time we get back to the point we're lost
well what was the original title gonna be
well something about a second title now well something about um um uh stoner language
stoner language yeah stoner culture speaking in a really good language um um um
um no I blanked on the word stoner somehow
I have it for me for the episode title here we go back to the point colon a rope of sand
what the fuck wow it was never got that reference was that a reference even or was that just
random you know well then if it's that random I don't have to explain myself to you people
no very well Peggy the tighter and tighter I tried I'll hold on to the threat of conversation here
the faster it slips through my fingers like sands through an hourglass so are these sands
oh my god oh this madness is in california all three of you guys must be being california
no I'm not I reckon yeah I'm in them I'm in the middle of the country especially
Peggy must be Peggy must be in the very southern parts of california
no I'm way more east than sound chaser hey here's a little bit of coffee that no one has
taken the time to point out so I'm gonna do it but until we started doing these podcasts where um
you know we had we had some fritzon and some australian guys on I always thought it was only like
cowboys who ever use the word reckon um I'm I'm a fan of reckon I don't use a lot of
australian slang like a good example is just to compare me in p to 64 and how we speak
but um I'm I'm a fan of reckon I it's it's it's kind of it's kind of falling out of fashion I think
but I like it's a fun word reckon yeah yeah reckon slang in australia fair thank him well I think
it's a matter of exporting our culture to other places right in which you're up a lot in uh
I think reckon would turn up a lot in westerns and we sported a lot of westerns to other cultures
movies and books and whatever so that's probably where it actually got picked up and and
derivated into their language well that's what I meant by cowboys you know like the western movies but
I I've never heard anybody say it but I you know I hear the australian guys say it all the time
and you know several the British guys have heard say well it's because I think they're talking to
us and because you know they think it's it's it's it's it's there if they're twisted filter on our
culture I hope and pray that that is true you mean upside down filter oh I know we're we're
is right down before when we got to a six when we got to an australian joke I know I don't I don't
mind a good australian joke a good upside down joke but they're getting really badly lately
I think that's the idea Dan's Dan has been away for too long that's what's wrong
yeah he kind of sneaks him in not really
they're not really very very it's like it's like a very thin veil of subtlety like almost
imperceptible well no because we're all used to it now but it's not you know when they're done badly
people just come right outwardly oh yeah an australia podcast don't get recorded and we have to
pretend that this isn't they're not funny they don't have it in australia you have
beetroot on your podcast oh crickets yeah sorry man all right so moving on from mad coutesies
what else we got um oh yes this is just the best story ever the next ability to do I died
12.10 yes yes wait wait wait wait wait you said it's quite excited when that happened also
you said it's the best story ever then you mentioned Ubuntu yeah yeah this is the best story ever
because we get to make fun of Ubuntu I thought it was going to be best story in australia
oh Jesus don't boom yeah I don't want to make fun of Ubuntu I just I don't even pay attention to
anymore it's it's like no no dude just just just wait for it and tell me if you know the meaning of
either of these two words also the name for 12.10 is going to be Quanto Quetzal yes I know the
meaning of both you do not I do honest you are a filthy lia sir no no no I I you can ask my
girlfriend she's a candidate you don't know it you could tell me what they mean right now or
you're full of crap Quanto is um it's like a it's something with two states and it's going to be
in either one state or the other so like you know like a quantum particle or something you
could exist in two and oh Quanto as in quantum um well and what's the Quetzal it's a bird
this is bullshit nobody can wikipedia fast no nobody can wikipedia fast they've already
discussed this on the Ubuntu UK podcast oh he already heard it what wait you listen to a
Ubuntu UK yeah let's guys are right oh god what who is it Judd it's Jonno right no no I know
I thought it's not Jonno who else is um it's it's a it's poppy who is not poppy some people
confused us um there's poppy that's crap not it there's poppy um oh what what what wait you're
on Ubuntu UK or uh no no no no no no different people poppy poppy and poppy right I thought you
said don't confuse poppy and poppy as in it was you right no no no poppy no I'm saying that some
people have confused us just because the ranger are similar which I don't know why because he's
actually done stuff I only just hang out with people to do stuff but uh there's there's
there's no one on their name right um they're all everybody on there they're really witty people
they're funny and it's a fun show to listen to I don't use Ubuntu or really care about it but
their show is good well this is just turned into a not bash Ubuntu Fest so let's just move right
along actually oh wait wait wait wait I actually have an article here that I was just starting to
look at that was a review of Ubuntu 1204 the Ubuntu GNOME Shell remix review and they made the
main subtitle the main subtitle of the article is I GNOME 3 Shell sucks they needed to do a whole
re-spin of Ubuntu to work that out I guess it might be the only person on here that
loves GNOME 3 indeed you are sir you want to know what you want to know what GNOME 3 did to me
drove me to show me on the doll where to touch you show me on the doll boy
okay it worked its headset is what it did sound chaser I have one of those dolls if you need it
you want the boy or the girl in the life I guess
so no I haven't even seen GNOME 3 having bothered I've been on XFCE for a while quite happy with it
you know I have used I have used XFCE and I think it's great
I really do I think it's heading shoulders above anything else out right now enlightenment has
surprised me though I I had tried using enlightenment many times and didn't think a whole lot of it
but now recently I've playing with it and it's pretty good I played with enlightenment a couple
of times I tried it on that go Ubuntu that was about that was around about a couple of years ago
and I tried it on um there was another another distra was like a paid distra you had to
modify it but um and I was able to get like a live CD or something other that wasn't installable
or something like that and it really looked mean it had some cool useless features but as far as
like getting anything done and opening programs and stuff it was just nothing I could begin to
memorize where everything was and everything was you know three clicks away and it just I had a
they have changed that uh they all they ought to now they're well that is that is the thing that
has probably that has probably been the biggest change that has made me really really happy um they've
got a thing now called everything the everything launcher and it's it no no it's not just like a
start menu it's more like um the old gnome do so you can actually pull up a key you can start
typing it will find whatever you want to find it also has a back end that has plugins and everything
in it and it's not based on what the hell was that language that really bad language that was
out there C sharp derivative language how how is this revolutionary yeah mono that mono paste no it
is it was revolutionary it's evolution remember but you're like excited about it oh god no
it's just a big desk top slash manager conversation well enlightenment in itself is an exciting project
they I've just haven't seen it usable yet so for it to become usable at all it's actually really
cool because it's so lightweight and it's so decent looking um that it and it's so it's so many
features and that's been the biggest thing is I kept looking at it going okay I can go into the
configuration I can see all these features in here but I've got no freaking clue how to actually
use them and now that there's actually a decent layer over it where I can figure out how to launch
things or I can figure out how to do this and that actually to a point of being usable final break
out I'll break out my Peter 64 flashcards here and just say you guys should be using awesome
because it's simply awesome hey you know what I used awesome I I I have no problems with awesome I
like awesome a lot I I was on that for a long time hey peg wall in Australia does awesome mean
that you have to like configure everything by hand and it's completely unusable that actually
wasn't bad I didn't actually see that one coming that's pretty see it can be done right I told you
yes again fine jumps fine job on and so on so I tell you unrelated note no but you know I think
I think here's the thing here's a problem with an with an enlightenment in Australia it needs to go
back to the dark ages oh now see now you've just freaking ruined it oh come on yeah that one
like good job and then and then you just tried to chase it up and you just did a really bad job
you're fired well so I I want to I want to be side track us here if I can and you know
if you are you were you were you know be moaning the fact that when we couldn't make fun of a
bun too you know based on the story that you brought up but I'd like to point out that that in
it's in and of itself maybe good news at least to you because if we can't say anything good or
anything bad then they're kind of irrelevant right like that Linux podcast that nobody really
seems to talk about or listen to anymore I mean you can't even bring it up and say what they're
done wrong is just nobody cares see I'm not one of those people there was on a forum that I
frequent there was one guy I was bitching and moaning as usual about something and he
pointed out that if you rearrange the letters of my nickname you get hatred and and that right
there pretty much sums up my personality so if I can't bitch about a bun to that upsets me
well go ahead go rant on it right we don't know but it's it's been done it's been done you
you need you need reinforcement when you're when you're bitching about something Peggy kind of
volumbid for that earlier and now it's just completely let me down so fuck you Peggy well and well
you know okay okay so here's the thing I used to use the bun to I used to be in a bun to use
okay but I you know honestly it gets to the point where I got pissed off enough with it
them trying to put in the bun to one store and these cloud storage crap and then changing to
your unity shell and all this stuff that I said fuck them I want them out of my life I want to
actually have just rows that have standard stuff in them and so then I went to Debbie and went
to a straight like XSE desktop then awesome and now I want to head start playing with Sabian because
I want to have a standard stuff or things that I can actually work with and not be tied into some
back end of them trying to control what you do all right now see his his that's why you come
to me you started renting about Ubuntu and then you decided to rationalize it no I basically said
I basically just said I got pissed off enough with them that I dumped them that's exactly my point
no no no it's exactly my point everybody used to be an Ubuntu user but they turned us away
and they turned us away so completely and for so long now that they're just irrelevant to us
you guys are missing the point I just wanted an excuse to bitch about something
no no we're not going back from hating you just have no frame of reference to join in
oh stop it all right so one last thing I could say about Ubuntu I got to go ahead and
ee if you go ahead and do your southern accents again you can be bitchy all you wags and you'll
sound like it's another belt bitch okay if you want to bitch about if you want me to
bitch about Ubuntu 1004 I can do that because that's the last one that I ever saw that mark
shorter worth he just got my niggas in it oh damn it in a blender I got a blender than I had a
complete brain thought damn he got he just got my niggas all in a twist no in a vacuum he got
them in a vacuum cleaner and you enjoyed it and then my god holy crap wait I'm the only one they
never mind it wasn't me yeah I tried it out I got my morkin stuck in the hose
how'd you get it asked to beat your brush oh that's very nice thingy that I was totally
attiring to frieva's god that was excellent that was beautiful yeah how did you get it past that
spinny brush thing. It was a cold day. It was a shrinkage thing, huh? Yeah. Oh my god.
Stop. Stop. Stop right now. Stop. See, you're going to kill sounding. My plan is working.
Yeah, it'll be okay. Eventually. The circle is no complete. So one more thing I want to say
on Ubuntu and then we're totally going to move on. I would just like to point out that underneath
the article discussing the new code name for Ubuntu under related articles, it lists an article
entitled Childhood Stress Leaves Genetic Scars. That's all I want to say. Oh, that's a wicked good
story. I've heard about that. That's good stuff. What? I've heard about that stuff. It's really
cool. I can't explain it. It's not that good. No, that's it. You stress can leave genetic scars
for like pre-generation. So it's really neat how it works. Wow. That's pretty stunning actually.
Yeah. No, I'm like, I'm stunned that we all of a sudden just got like a really serious.
No, I actually that sounds fascinating to me. It's really interesting.
And so what it is is like if I'm like say if you go through a period of famine and you have to
adjust to that and that stress you know happens, there's like these sub codes in your DNA that
usually just kind of latent and then never activated because there's no like a protein or something
just doesn't hook up to them. It's not like it's not expressed until you need it. And then when
you need it, it's it's it now has that protein attached to it. So when you when you have children
like that protein or whatever it is and I'm getting it so wrong don't even know but it's
something like this. But whatever that protein that's activated on the DNA gets passed down as
an activated gene and it takes several generations for it to go latent again. And it's not like a
dominant and recessive gene where it can just go away. It'll always be there. It's just whether it's
it's latent or active. It's really cool stuff. So that really that kind of shoots out the whole
thing that we thought a lot of that kind of stuff was really more social conditioning and social
stuff and there's actually a genetic explanation for it instead. Well it's both. It's the cool part.
It's it's really both. It's an overlap of the two of them. What I what I thought was cool about it
was when I heard it explain I heard a whole podcast on somewhere I wish I remember where it was
from. But when I heard it explained they kept bringing up this like three generation thing and
that seems to do the key is that it's it's there for three generations. And if you look back in
the Bible all the curses last three generations. So you know I you got to wonder if there's like
some kind of latent or not not latent to do some kind of a you know observational knowledge that
happened there that they picked up on this. That is actually interesting. That's very interesting.
Wow. And now I love Bible references. So here we've gone from stoner stuff to to Bible to
Bible. Peggy's gonna get very angry here. Peggy's gonna get very angry shortly. Did you ever read
a Bible on weed. And again we have come full circle. Wow. I would I get angry that you're
discussing the Bible because you live in the south. I do not live in the south. Oh gee guys.
I'm not being serious. It's a joke. Peggy lives in the south.
Even his name is Peggy. He came to the south. Yeah. Yeah. That was really it's Ohio south.
And let's go. That was hilarious. It's not Ohio. It's Indiana. It's cruel all of you.
It's because he's sound so southern. I wasn't aware I sounded southern. You sound southern.
No he doesn't. No he's not Midwestern is it Midwestern sounds southern to a foreigner. I could
get him. Oh he damn it. Oh bad. It's bad. Come on. Okay. Here's the story. Massive methane
released in the Arctic region. Dan Walshko visited the Arctic but okay.
So do you only have a headline there? He has some details. Okay. So methane stored in
permafrost which is melting and methane hydrates trapped in marine reservoirs are vulnerable to
being released into the atmosphere as the plant warms. However researches are blah blah blah blah blah
apparently apparently the methane releases from these phenomenon don't add up
when you look at all the methane that's been released in the Arctic region to date so there's
something else that's causing a lot of methane released in the Arctic region. So he not only
skims the story for himself he does it for everybody. That's crazy. So there's a there's a way to make
this techie. No there's not a way to make this techie. I just thought that we were going to get a lot
of thought jokes out of the reference to methane. I tried to do a fart joke and it failed. So
yeah all the fart jokes are too obvious man. So there's a okay his there's a land
in a trillion story. Come on. I'm going to make this techie real quick. There's a land
filled by my house that recaptured I mean not that close to my house but it's near but it recaptures
a bunch of methane that comes out of the ground and I don't know if they've laid some kind of
you know pipes or some kind of system to capture it all but they recapture it and they pipe it to
the university that's probably 20 miles down the road from here and the university uses it to
produce electricity and it's it's a big portion of their electrical usage. It's really cool. It's
a project they started about five or six years ago and it was the first one of its kind so
that's really neat. So they're working out for me. No way. Yeah they're waiting pipes. That's
that's the cool part about it. Our town actually does something like that. It's kind of cool.
Is it like a wheelibrator or is it literally recapturing the methane? I don't really know but
I know that they do something like that. Yeah and the reason why they did it up here
because they looked at you know I'm sure dozens of sites where it might have been possible throughout
the country but this was the only place where there was already like a straight line cut you
know right from the the university to the to the landfill and we've got like a highway running
right there so they really didn't need it to you know fight over right away and that kind of thing
we just dug it up and laid it next to the highway and Portio.
All right next week. All the ones previous have been so bad. I'm trying to look for a good one.
So the New South Wales police force in Australia is on the bad end of a $10 million lawsuit
from a company whose software they've apparently been pirating for nobody even knows how long to
access their criminal intelligence database. That's fantastic. See what I'm talking about. No I'm
serious. I love every part of that story. I love that the police have been breaking the law
longer than anybody knows and they probably didn't even realize they were breaking the law.
It's just I love that. Well this is admin somewhere that knew they were breaking the law.
And if they did they didn't care because if they didn't know they didn't care because they
was jamming to some Judas Priest. Okay. Never heard the song breaking the law by Judas Priest. You
know what never mind. Do I know who Judas Priest is? No. Hey Payroll. I've heard of that song and
I heard you say it. I'm from the RIA and we're going to need $6 million. Oh yeah well I've heard
you sing Happy Birthday. We can just forget this whole thing. It happened. I've heard you sing
Ba Ba Black Sheep. You're racist. That's horrible. Hey no no it happened in Australia.
Ba Ba Black Sheep is racist. They've changed it to Ba Ba Rainbow Sheep. Ba Ba Rainbow Sheep?
Yes. Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba.
That's horrible. I'm going to say something in your language here because I need to know.
Is this fair, dank gum? This is fair, dank gum. I'm going to find out. I'm going to find you a
bone of feed-a story about an hang on. That's what he's doing that. Has anybody heard about this
whole thing with Slackware? Where their website was down for several days? Yes that's one of
the stories we're getting there. We're getting there. Okay just keep your panties on.
I hadn't heard it because anybody knew what caused it. There's a comment on the
DistroWatch thread that said the Slackware.com server is down. This is a technical malfunction.
It costs money to do something about that. Something will be done about that server but it takes a
while. It is most likely caused by prioritizing in finances. Everything kept running fine with the
website down like there was still commits to the repository and the changelog was still getting
updated. That just nobody had the money or the inkling to fix the website when it went down.
Which I would suggest means that maybe the community needs to help out Patrick
something because I'll be honest. This kind of scared me because Slackware is the oldest
distro around still and I don't want to see that go away. I don't want to see them ever in a
situation where they don't have the financing and capabilities to actually keep things running.
But I don't understand how complex is that website? What are they running? Can they not just
stick it on some cheap ass shared hosting for a while? He just said it's not an issue of complexity.
It was an issue of money. No but that's what I mean. You can get a dream host account for like
a hundred bucks a year. Yeah but you had to realize you had to tell you know what they're paying for
ban with what they're paying for you know all this other stuff. Either you want to share hosting
you still have ban with chargers and all this stuff. I would say that you know granted this
something was a hardware failure but they could still end up in the same situation if they couldn't
pay the bill for shared hosting. Like this is a hardware failure or a hosting but I mean like
you know very well once you reach the the cap on your unlimited service the bill goes up
exponentially. Yeah I think I was misunderstanding. This is like the website where they're like
releasing that ISOs and stuff. Well there'd be links on it to the ISOs and that would probably come
off some other server but the point was it would be the front end to everything. This is like
their front door. Yeah yeah so this is what it sounds like is the front page to stack with.
So what it would it tells me is that not what it says to me is that everyone who's interacting with
Slackware already knows where they're going they're not going to the front page and looking for links
but but but San Jason I'm glad you mentioned that about sending them donations because it
you're probably right. This probably doesn't mean it's time for that. Yeah I don't like that.
Red Hat Red Hat Red Hat Anyone Anyone Red Hat? Yeah I'll take that. I
I don't have a problem with corporate sponsorship, you know, it's just that it's got to fit
properly with the project and I can't envision a corporate sponsor who could use the
Slackware project for its own good and for Slackware is good at the same time.
No, but that's what I'm saying, I'm not suggesting that some corporate company should come
in and take it over.
I'm suggesting some corporate company to go like, we use lots of Slackware.
Next time for us to get back to the community, here's $100,000 or something like that.
Well, that's a donation, that's a little bit different.
Corporate sponsorship usually means $100,000, they're probably going to want their name
on the website somewhere or something like that.
Well, there's some form of quid pro quo, if there's corporate sponsorship, I don't want
to, personally, I wouldn't want to see that.
I would actually like to see the Slackware project as a whole stay completely independent
of any corporate liability, even if it is as much as putting a corporate logo on their
website.
Granted, maybe they do have some of the logos on their website already, but personally,
I think it's up to us as a community to support this project.
They are the oldest project that is still in existence around Linux.
Well, yeah, I want to see them, I want to see them maintain complete independence.
I want to see this project out there for 20, 30, 40, 50 years without having to rely on anybody
else.
They're still a pretty good community around it.
I use Slackware.
I use you Slackware.
I use it.
Maybe I need to get into Slackware, everyone seems to use Slackware, like everyone that
I know.
I don't know of it being used in any corporate environments or anything like that, but everyone
I know seems to be using Slackware for something.
Actually, that's how I first got exposed to it.
It was actually a company that I was at, actually Buildless Slackware Server.
No, Jesus.
Yeah.
At the time, we actually brought in a consultant who said, the best thing for doing this gateway
to the Internet stuff was to build a Slackware server and set all this stuff up.
That was actually what really got me into one of the very first things that got me interested
in Linux.
I would just like to say this on top recording Windows sucks.
My recording is now in three parts.
Wait, wait, wait, he's using Windows?
No, the recording window of mumble being on top of the mumble window is annoying.
Oh, oh.
Because they keep accidentally hitting the stop button.
You can't put that on a separate desktop, so you don't hit it.
I thought you were talking about Microsoft Windows.
What else wrong with you, man?
So I thought for a second.
Oh, shit on up.
All right.
Well, it's a good thing that I'm recording and editing this too.
Yeah.
I'm recording it too.
I've got two hours and 20 minutes worth of recording that uninterrupted.
So, I don't see a place on Slackware.com.
Here they accept contributions.
That's not good.
Well, people can contact Patrick Holdering, while greeting directly.
Oh, geez.
Wow.
This last post is dated a year ago yesterday.
Oh, no.
And no, you don't want people having to email a guy to make a donation, geez.
Even if it's a paper.
Wow.
Stick it on the front page, geez.
Yeah.
I was just going to say unless that's not what he's all about.
That's what he has been about for many years.
I mean, he's been very focused on producing a high quality, very stable distribution, not
about actually attracting money, attracting other people and stuff, you know, in that respect.
Yeah, but that has now become a problem.
Like his goal is now at risk due to the lack of focus on financing.
Well, I mean, he's had one hardware failure.
You know what?
I'll be honest with you.
This is the only time I've heard a story like this about Slackware ever.
Oh, no, no, no, don't get me wrong.
This story was obviously totally blown out of proportion.
I'm just saying, given that it is the first one and it was reasonably significant, particularly
when you put it in the context of what everyone's perceptions of the problem were, maybe
it is time to start putting a little more focus on finance before things do get problematic.
Well, by the same token, you know, and maybe this is a, I can't speak for Patrick on this
because obviously I don't know the whole situation, but problem with having something
out there where he just automatically accepts payments or accepts money in that.
This brings out the question of, does he have to have some kind of corporation or some
other entity around that to actually handle and manage that money and then has to report
back to people who have made contributions or have to deal with some kind of business
structure in that respect, which he may not want to do.
So you probably, yeah, you probably do want like a Slackware foundation or something otherwise
it's going to be counted as your income and you're going to be taxed on it or some
stupid shit like that, which he may not want to do.
He may not want to actually just set up a foundation and do all that crap and I found
what went wrong.
Beth, what was it?
He was running on a donated server that somebody had given him and it was, yeah, it was an
Apple server and he's a smoker and they just don't work around smoker.
Oh, he says.
Good thing I switched the e-six, right?
Oh, those are bad, man.
Let's have both a full of formaldehyde and stuff, aren't they?
These are terrible, dude.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
All the guys at my work switched to them and switched right back off when they found
what was actually in them.
Look at what's in there, dude.
Switched to pigment.
Nicotine flavoring and propylene glycol in water.
That's it.
I read it right off the package.
Nicotine flavoring?
Nicotine and flavoring and propylene glycol in water.
I think Leicol is the, no, it's actually an oil, it's the oil that they use for smoke effects
now.
They replace dry ice with purvelling Leicol.
I don't even like inhaling that smoke that comes out of smoke machines, little learned
directly breathing the liquid.
Actually that's well, not a lot of breathing the liquid, but the stuff that comes out of
the smoke machines now, the whole reason they switch to that is because it doesn't have
any of the negative health side effects that you get from dry ice.
But it stinks.
I love the smoke that came out of that smoke machine that sound chaser had hooked up
this water bomb.
That thing.
So, as I was saying, speaking of windows, you know, like 10 minutes ago, I was like,
yeah, Microsoft Office 15 is going to support ODF 1.2.
I will believe it when I see it.
And we'll have to see how they do with it.
One of the things that came out was when they first started supposed to play ODF, but
hey, ethyr, in Redmond, does support mean that you come out with all your own set of
standards?
Probably.
Oh, so Microsoft's an Australian based company?
Yeah, it was a really good thing, man.
Brut!
Got it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
There's a Redmond Washington in Australia.
Yeah, that's all they're going to do if they go, if they support open document format,
they're going to put things in there that no one else can support.
This is just too serious.
It was supposed to be a joke article.
We were all supposed to have a good laugh about Microsoft reckoning that they were going
to support ODF and then we were supposed to move on.
What's with all the serious discussions, people?
Because we were actual geeks and we actually have been tracking this shit for several years
now.
Yeah, so that was fair.
Yeah.
Given that we have been tracking this crap, we know that it's a bit of shit that Microsoft
is spouting right now and we should just laugh at it and say their idiots, right?
I personally would love it if they would do it.
I will give them the chance to prove themselves, but you know, like I said, I'll believe it
when I see it.
Yeah, I mean, you know, anytime Microsoft actually wants to step up to the table and actually
play with the open source community on an even level playing field, I'm all for it.
However, we have not to this date ever seen one case where they really have done that.
So I was going to say speaking of putt, that sounds like about the biggest pipe dream I've
ever had.
No, no, no, no, no, Microsoft has done some free software stuff and some open source
stuff.
They have.
It has been done.
So they have, but Pokey, they've always done it with an ulterior motive.
Everyone.
Yep.
Then it was an ulterior motive.
Everyone has ever done free software has done it with their own interests in mind.
Well, when those, okay, when I say an ulterior motive, the ulterior motive from Microsoft
self-serving ulterior motive.
Well, that's what an ulterior motive is.
It is self-serving.
Yeah.
But what you're saying is that the reason that they're doing it is to harm the free software
community.
That's a different argument, but I don't, I don't see it that way.
And I'll, I'll need an example if you've got no, they've gone out, I mean, they've tried
to undermine it.
I mean, they're, they're whole the first version of their ODF export filters and stuff.
They actually were doing stuff where they were actually writing out files that were not
compatible with, say, open office at that point.
What did they start doing?
Well, that, the whole point was they're, they're trying to undermine what the ODF standard
was.
And they were.
I don't believe that for a minute.
I, that's incompetence.
That's not sabotage.
No, I, I would totally agree with Sandy.
No, it was, it was far more deliberate.
And if you go back and look at that, some of the articles on Groclaw, they actually went
through and they found several other references to exactly what Microsoft was doing.
In their filters, it was thoroughly deliberate.
It was a very much an attempt to undermine the ODF standard.
Okay.
All right.
You win this argument.
I'll accept that.
So I, you know, when I, when I say Microsoft is self-serving, it's not just self-serving,
it's trying to undermine stuff.
The only things I can say that I have never actually heard now granted is self-serving,
but I cannot say that they were directed at undermining the open source community was
their kernel contributions.
Their kernel contributions were, were derived to actually improve the support for Hyper-V.
Yeah.
But that, that, that was still self-serving, that just wasn't it.
It's self-serving.
Yes.
I said that.
So let me ask you a question about that because this is something I've never understood
about that.
Um, those kernel contributions, was that done to allow windows to run better under
windows or Linux to run better under windows.
That window to allow Linux to be virtualized on Microsoft's visualization platform without
you having to install binary blobs to have it interact correctly.
What example, Ron would ever do that?
I know.
Oh, oh, oh, oh, pokey.
Having been in the corporate world for a while, you would not believe how many, how many
many moronic management decisions to try to do shit like that there are.
My last workplace, we were running WordPress, so PHP and MySQL, on a Windows and IIS environment.
We installed the fast CGI plugin for IIS and ran PHP under IIS.
You?
Exactly.
Yeah.
That doesn't really cover it in the slightest, but yes, I take your sentiment.
Well, I mean, just doing simple math, I mean, I'm not a very smart man, you know, present
company considered, but if you were to run a Windows machine and as a hypervisor, how
many Linux machines can you install that thing before it starts falling over?
And now reverse the rules and now you put a Linux machine as, you know, on the iron
at the core of it and you run Windows on top of that.
And how many more servers are you going to get out of that?
I mean, it just is not hard to figure out.
Well, yeah, my current is, it is not your hard to figure out.
My current workplace runs about a dozen Windows VMs on top of Citrix N7.
Yeah, there is no street cut formula for that, for that Pokey.
I mean, that's not, you can actually use it down and say, even saying, you know, set
as hardware, putting hypervion versus putting, say, AVM or Zen, on a server, there's no
one-to-one correlation of.
Okay.
God, this just got real.
Yeah, unfortunately, you walked into my fucking job, so, you know, we got real for a second
there.
And Peggy didn't say shit the whole time.
No, it was actually kind of nice.
I liked it.
Yeah, Peggo was typing to me in a VM in IRC about you.
That dumb fucking Aussie.
No, no.
No, no.
That was reassuring.
No, we were discussing soundshows as water-borne.
Okay.
And actually, what he typed wasn't about anyone here at all, just, but please don't let's
go there.
No.
What's it about 30?
You talk about my water-borne again?
Let me come on.
I don't have one.
I like you.
I like how we've been talking about his water-borne.
And he just now goes, I don't have a water-borne.
Yeah.
That just tells me he's been using it for a while.
No, I've had enough rubber gloves tonight that I don't give a shit what you guys say.
What?
And you guys have enough rubber gloves?
I don't give a shit what you guys say.
I don't drink.
You must be parched.
You poor thing.
Are you drinking tonight?
No, sir.
I'm not.
I think I should be doing a show with this a little bit because, you know, he and I drink
it about equal.
I think it's sometimes.
I do like it.
I don't believe you.
Enough room.
You could not possibly drink as much as that man.
I mean, maybe per capita sure, but at one sitting, I don't think so.
Oh, dude.
What?
Half an hour.
What?
I'm two thirds of the way through a bottle of rum already.
Tonight.
Oh, man, I did that.
What kind of rum are you drinking?
Sailor Jerry.
Okay.
Oh, god.
I'm sorry.
I just bought a bottle of Bacardi Gold and it is, as the Germans would say, Pistpassa.
It's horrible.
Piggies like, what does that mean?
Oh, no.
I know what that means.
I'm half German.
Thank you.
Oh, man.
For you didn't love.
My old man used to call that kind of rot gut panther piss and it really is Bacardi Gold's
day away.
Yeah.
I mean, Jerry Sailor is actually a much better rum than Bacardi Gold.
Sure.
You know, now that you say that, Piggie, I think the accent makes sense.
How?
Half German.
Wait, your half German.
Your half German probably sounds a bit southern.
Half German and you live in the Midwest.
Are you on it?
I'm half German, half Irish.
So you're on it?
Oh.
Pogie, there is no way to be half German, half Irish would ever make you a homage.
That actually just qualifies him.
No, the only thing that just qualifies me from is getting a tan.
Men and I, then.
No, just a half Irish just qualifies him from all of those.
So speaking of drinking, I invented a drinking game, but I've yet to try it out.
I want to know what you guys think.
Go for it.
Go.
All right.
Did you guys ever play jungle speed?
No.
No, I'm not familiar with that one.
Okay, then this totally isn't going to work because it's just based on jungle speed.
But I think jungle speed could make a good drinking game.
It could make actually two different good drinking games, but.
So jungle speed, it's a really cool game where cheese, it's so hard to explain.
Just think of it like slap jack for grown ups.
And it's about like matching up cards and having a good reaction time.
But I think it would be cool if each time you played around where there was a win,
it was like a winner of all these rounds, like constantly.
But every time there was a winner of around, the winner would have to take a drink.
And I think it would really level the game out over time.
Wow, that actually sounds like it could be fun.
Hey, maybe we could do a podcast around that.
Yeah, it's a face-to-face game that you have to be right there.
Not if you get people who are willing to agree that if they win the round, they have to drink.
I think Sunday just wants an excuse to drink while podcasting.
No, no, what I mean is the game.
Oh, fuck, I don't mean that.
No, the game is a physical game.
The game is a physical game.
You all have to, whenever matching cards come up, the people whose cards match have to reach for,
they call it a totem.
It's like a big, it looks like a pepper mill, really.
You have to reach for it and snatch it before the other guy does.
I don't know, maybe we can find something to code it.
And hitting like a buzzer isn't going to work because that, you know,
there's no way you can bleed from reaching for the buzzer at the same time.
The game is wild, you have to try it.
So really, you just want us to drink together and play this game so we could possibly get a fist fight.
No, no, it's not like that.
I hope she doesn't think of it that way.
But if you could play it the other way too, you could play where the loser takes a drink.
And then it just turns into a game of asshole really.
Well, maybe it goes both ways.
Maybe the winner takes one drink and the loser takes two.
Oh my goodness.
See, these rules need to be good.
But you have to play the game first and then you'll understand why drinking could improve the game.
You know what?
I'm thinking self is coming up.
If we can find the right volunteers, we could actually do a podcast of this in a bar.
Yeah, you're really good.
I am so listening to that.
That's where I played.
That's where I played Jungle Speed was at Northeast Linux Fest.
She's who brought that.
Did Jonathan show for that?
Yeah, he freaking won every round.
It was unbelievable.
Oh, fuck.
He should seem like pinball, but.
Oh, that was horrible.
You made the joke.
I only went along with it.
Oh, I thought you were being serious.
You made the joke.
I just laughed at it.
I thought you were being serious.
I was like, wait.
No, Jonathan did not play Jungle Speed with us.
Oh, okay.
You bastard.
Yeah.
I love how absolutely gullible he is tonight.
It's awesome.
This is like the first time I've met Pokey.
And I just got done with like two hours of curating news.
I'm like, well.
And the worst part is it's like references to the who by, you know, Tommy by the who was actually going way over E's head.
So.
Oh, that's okay.
It was me and I shouldn't have said it.
But I think Jonathan would have appreciated the joke.
Yeah.
I wasn't going to that.
I was learning to go there.
Oh, no.
Yeah.
He was there.
But yeah.
He will somewhere else in the bar when we were playing that.
But people kept wandering in and out of the game too.
Because you can play it with.
It is.
You was three people.
But really the more people that you have at the table, the better.
You see, and I'm wondering because basically it was rejected on the last KPO doing a live podcast from self.
Maybe we could do a version of this game instead.
See, now here's the thing, SoundChaser.
You don't have to get people's, you don't have to get people to agree to do a live podcast.
You just bring like a sans a clip plus in your pocket and just turn it on.
Oh, dude.
You have no idea.
You know how, you don't know how good I am at that.
I actually have a, what is it here?
I have a Kaskam BR07 that I actually have a condenser mic that I can clip to the bill of a baseball cap.
Run the wire down back behind my ear and into a pocket.
I actually walk around recording the whole time in some place.
That clip I want to.
Now everyone itself is going to feed you liquor until they can steal this thing.
Nobody notices?
Not when I did it last time.
Holy crap.
Yeah, I went to a master's conference in Milwaukee.
Oh, it's great.
It's just another nerd with some gear in the crowd.
Like, it's awesome.
You can do whatever you need.
Yeah, well, and if anybody asks me, I tell them what I'm doing.
I mean, you know, I've got no qualms about telling people what I'm doing.
Yeah, and again, I go back to the sans a clip plus.
I've done the same thing.
Clicked it to my ball cap and been able to walk around and record hands free.
Yeah.
Well, the great thing about the, the, the taskam is when I'm recording with it.
It actually breaks everything every hour.
So it breaks it into one hour chunks that I can go back and edit and pull out what I need.
That's pretty good.
Yeah.
How come you guys call it a ball cap?
Because I, I call it a baseball cap or ball cap just baseball.
Yeah.
So you know what kind of hat it is, but I never wear hats.
So you can't take that from me anyway.
I see that everywhere all the time.
It's the first time I've heard it called something like that.
And when you said you were running around clipping things to a ball cap,
I kind of had something different.
And I was just like, oh, okay.
Where I'm going, we call that.
That's something down there.
It's baseball cap on our heads.
Where I come from, they call that the utility or tactical mercen.
No, you need to see that in your W voice.
No.
Why not?
That was perfect for your W voice.
Nope.
Why not?
You busted.
So when was the last time any of you guys compared like cell phone plans and that kind of thing?
Why?
My mind went comparing merkins.
I don't know why.
Yeah, that comparing word is going to hug out there for a second.
Yeah, it really did.
That's why we don't do a video chat here.
Okay, so I don't compare cell phones.
This is that.
That random roulette we can compare merkins.
Okay, I don't compare cell phone plans primarily because mine's half mixed up with my work with needs for work.
So I've got like an unlimited data plan, unlimited call plan, all that stuff.
So I don't ever bother comparing anybody else's plans.
So does your work paper part of it?
Is that why you don't do it?
Yeah, they have to.
Yeah, okay.
Well, okay, let's compare the Z and the Yankees then.
Yeah, I have unlimited call data and text for about 120 bucks a month.
Yeah, mine's about 150 a month.
Yeah, that's my TNC wanted to soak us for it too.
We just found this other one net 10 that'll do unlimited calling data and texting for 50 bucks a month or 40 bucks a month.
Okay, so I'm stuck with mine.
It's unlimited call data text at 150 a month, but I get 50 back from work.
And I actually have to have that plan.
So I'm actually on a business based plan.
Right, right.
And that's why I got the answer provider is them.
Yeah, exactly.
I have to run.
I have to actually run a separate program to actually access my email.
So who's your carrier?
Verizon.
Yeah, it sounded like Verizon do.
And Pegwall, I'm guessing you're AT&T because that's the field.
No, sir.
I'm on sprint where I have actual true unlimited data.
Yeah, okay.
Yeah, because they want.
They want about 120 a piece for my wife and I too for our phones with data plans.
And we're just like, now this is not going to happen.
What the hell?
Well, okay, no, let me back up for a minute.
They per a family plan.
You get, well, not even unlimited minutes, but for the amount of minutes that we would need,
the family plan would be like $100 and then they want 20 bucks a piece for data.
So for 20 bucks, AT&T will give you 300 megabytes.
You shocked everyone into silence with that awful crime.
I haven't died.
Yeah, you could go through 300 megs easily in an hour.
Well, 300 megs are wandering around and your phone just pinging the tower.
Hang on.
Before I put too much shit on your plans, Sandy, what is your job?
I'm actually in IT.
You're a super-protector and support person.
Okay.
All right.
So you just want to guess what?
I have my plan.
I have to be able to crap on you.
Yeah, exactly.
I have to be able to get my email so I can check out alerts or I have to be on call for stuff.
I have to be able to reach, but on call if there is actually failover activity or any emergency type activities.
I have to be able to access my email and my phone.
That's bullshit.
No, no, but that.
But they pay for it.
They pay for it.
So I'm not worried about it.
No, no, no.
His job pays for his phone.
He's, uh, he's actually, uh, it's a booty call.
Yeah.
No, no, no.
He's, he's what's bullshit.
I am on call 24-7.
If I get an alert SMS, I'm supposed to drop what I'm doing and go get it and work doesn't pay for my phone.
Why wouldn't they pay for your phone?
Yeah, I'm going to pay at least partially for it.
Yeah.
Well, that's a good question.
I'm what, one to which I have no answer.
But, uh, back to...
This is a good point to look, though, because right now I was just looking at my, uh, data usage for the month.
And I've got, um, 620, oh, sorry, 677 Meg used for this month.
Okay.
No, let the man speak.
I work for a pretty small company, so I reckon they probably just don't even consider paying for anybody's phone.
But, um, you guys are, I can't believe how much you guys are paying.
I mean, I don't get much on my plan, but my plan is cheap.
I am on prepaid, just because it's cheaper than plan.
It's to be on plan and prepaid is cheaper, so I switched back to prepaid.
I pay 40 bucks a month for, I think, about $600 worth of calls.
And I only get 800 megs of data, but I actually don't even use it.
And I'm pretty heavy on data.
But I suppose you use a lot more data when you have a data network that actually works.
See, I don't know, because I've never had a data plan.
And even though I have an Android phone, I still don't have a data plan.
I just turn the, you know, the network.
Wow, the Wi-Fi.
That's amazing.
That's amazing.
I turn the network off.
Yeah.
I don't use it.
Wow.
And it's just, because that's what I really want.
I want a phone with, you know, something along the lines of unlimited minutes for calling.
Because I talk to a friend of mine all the time.
He's pretty old-school, and he really only communicates over the phone.
And I don't need text.
I don't want to pay for text.
I don't want to pay for data.
I just want to make phone calls.
And they don't exist anymore.
I want a plan that is like data with like 10, with like 10 calls and 10 SMSes a month.
But they won't do that here.
Yeah, well, if I do either, you've got to get unlimited everything.
Yeah.
See, the funny thing about mine is that all the data usage on here is between the email for that, for my company.
And updates to the applications.
Literally, that's all I've used to do.
What is my data usage for this month?
Yeah, I wouldn't even do that.
I turned the network off and just let Wi-Fi.
Let it all be done over Wi-Fi.
Yeah, but I can't do that.
Because if I'm outside of a Wi-Fi area, I've got to actually have it.
Okay, so you go on the road for them, too.
Well, I drive around, well, not necessarily on the road like real wide area,
but I drive around town and stuff, so I'll be between Wi-Fi areas.
Okay, so it's been seven days.
So it's a week.
I've used 102 megabytes.
Yeah, mine by the way, that's 677 is.
That's on my phone, no.
That's on my phone, no.
Yeah, so why am I in the 677s for the whole month?
I use plenty more data on my tablet, but my tablet has a $150 for 10 gigs and that lasts a year.
Who?
My tablets are all Wi-Fi based only.
I refuse to buy anything that I have to have any other kind of data plan for.
I would refuse to be on any kind of pay by a month plan for my tablet,
but as long as I can spend $150 and just have data for a year, I'm convinced that.
The whole, you know, like starting a Wi-Fi, because I have a three hour commute each day.
So like back and forth, I have one and a half hours each way.
So the tablet with the internet is really awesome for me.
So I'm happy to pay for that.
Are you commuting in a car or is that public transit?
That's, that's like 35 minutes walking and 50 minutes train.
Wow.
Okay, you can't.
You can't.
I can only do 20 to 30 minutes each way.
You don't have bicycles in Australia?
You got to walk to the train station.
Yes, they have bicycles.
And I could get a bicycle, but there's two ends of walking in both.
They're pretty much equal to each other.
So I don't really see much point running a bike.
And like this no place to put this.
Okay.
There's no place to put a bike at work.
I don't know where I'd put it.
And I certainly don't trust leaving my bike at the train station.
So I just walk.
And I'm one of those people that just sweats profusely for like no apparent reason whatsoever.
So if I rode to work, I would probably, it would probably look like I'd just walk through torrential rain by the time I got to work.
Now you can release that.
That I can understand.
I would very much like jump closer to home.
Am I actually riding my resume, right?
Well, not my name, but all the podcasts that I was wearing my resume.
I didn't know your resume was in one of those tabs in your browser.
Good.
Check.
I've been thinking I need to actually update my resume and stuff and circulate it.
But I don't know what kind of like my current drafts.
I'm not real worried about it.
I got another good one for you.
So my company that I work for now, they hired a bunch of us on from the company that we used to work for
because they won the contract and needed people in place who knew the system and who knew the campus.
So they hired us on and they changed our job titles so that they could pay us less.
Oh my god.
Yeah, no on it.
So in the area that we're in, I'm a phone technician.
The area that we're in, the phone technician prevailing wage is somewhere along the lines of 28 bucks an hour or something like that.
At the top of their pay scale, it's a union type scale.
And for a network engineer, it's like 2150 or something like that.
So they called us all network engineers and hired us on so they didn't have to give us the raise that we would do
about to get that raise up to up to good money.
And so I was so angry, I was so pissed off that I put network engineer on my LinkedIn profile.
And just just hoping if anybody called me, I could refer them to my company.
You know, and when I never, I never changed it back.
You know, once my hire settled down, I never changed it back.
And I've been getting calls lately from a headhunter looking for a network engineer in my area.
And this lady is like, yeah, we need someone who can run the citywide systems.
And you estimate lay in fiber and all this.
Are you interested?
We really like your resume on it.
It's just.
Oh my god.
So now I get to decide, do I want to update my resume and interview for this thing and just say, look, it's over my head, but I'm a fast learner.
Or do I want to just tell her I'm not interested?
Well, okay.
So here's my dilemma.
Here's the funny one for me.
Company that I left is still trying to backfill my position.
Nice.
How long ago?
18 months.
Oh my god.
Now on top of this, on top of this, another person is left.
So they are actually trying to backfill for two people now.
Have they called you to have to come back?
I keep getting hits from headhunters once a week.
Oh, it's headhunters on you.
Nice.
Oh, yeah.
Every week.
How big is the plus the two people?
Well, here's the thing about it.
It's a smaller division of a really big company.
Basically, there were about, it might direct group.
There were about 20 people.
Tell them to go back.
Tell the headhunters because this is great when you tell the headhunters this because they're not going to tell the company your name.
They're going to say, I have a candidate who can fill this slot.
Tell the headhunters you're looking for 200 grand.
Oh, no.
They listed a 70 to 90 grand period.
Right.
Tell the headhunters you'll take the job for 200.
Yeah.
So tell them it's 150.
You know, tell them it's 150.
You know what that happens.
You want to know what the problem is?
You don't want to go work differently amount?
I would rather be dead than go back to that company.
Honestly, yeah.
I don't know.
My last inflow was that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
All right.
That, unfortunately, I can't make a joke about that.
Seriously, if I said, I said, I said, flip back on that company's grounds.
I want to be struck by lightning.
That doesn't stop you from telling the headhunters you want 200 grand for the job.
No, but I actually, you know what I'm talking with them.
You want to know what I've done?
You want to know what I've done?
I've called the headhunters and I said,
I'll make you that that's a job for company X.
Or like, yeah, I'm like, you want to understand why you're actually searching for people so hard
and you've been searching for them for over a year?
Oh, no.
Because I've actually left that company and they have not been able to hold somebody in the position
for over a freaking year.
Now they've actually got somebody else who's actually left and they're trying to backfill for two people.
And when I tell hundreds of that, you have no idea.
I mean, the headhunters are just like stumbling all over the place going,
are you serious?
It's like, I'm like, they have no idea how bad that environment really is.
If you could make that work these days, you would really drop them.
If you just said, because you're trying to fill my old job,
but if you just said that, you would floor them.
You wouldn't either side the floor.
I know, I am that eloquent when I talk to them.
I only do about once a month or so just to make for the fun of it.
Oh, look for somebody, but it's a little bit of a revelation to them.
Realize that they're trying to fill a position that nobody wants.
And the worst part is they actually did get somebody to come in and work for.
It was one week for the guy quit.
And the worst part about it is guys last day was actually day before April 1st.
April 1st, April 1st, April 1st day, the joke day.
One of the guys from the office texted me and told me that the guy who was backfilled me was quitting.
And I looked at the time, it was March 31st or whatever, like 10 pm.
And so I texted him back.
I said, if you had sent this to me two hours later, I would have thought it was a joke.
And he was like, no, it ain't no joke.
I'm like, that's almost as good of a joke right there as there is.
Is that the guy actually quit the day before April Fools.
I got a fun story about what happened on April Fools.
This is very good.
All right.
Mike Cousin and his girlfriend have been living together, right?
Well, she found out she was...
Cousin.
Well, this podcast is getting more southern every fricking minute.
That's not southern.
Well, anyway, she found out...
Southern would have been in signal?
She found out she was pregnant.
Guess which day she picked to reveal this information?
Oh, no.
How many guesses do I get?
You get one.
If you get it wrong, I'm going to slap you.
So April Fools yesterday?
Look, you have to hold down a button to do the push of talk or else.
I'd fake slap you on this show.
Oh, I love pegable slaps.
Everybody knows that.
But when she revealed this information, we're just like, whatever.
I just kept going all day, you know?
Because who honestly revealed something serious like that on April Fools day?
Oh, that reminds me of a gag that my mom played on my sister once.
Go on.
That was bad setup.
Bad setup.
No, no, honest.
This was...
This truly happened.
I hope I can tell this as well as my mom ever told it.
But back in like the 80s, my mom for the first time in her life had the chance to get contact lenses
because she's got all kinds of like stigmatisms and lazy eyes and all this kind of stuff.
And they just never worked up until then.
So she was all excited about getting her contact lenses.
And for like two or three months on end, she would talk about, oh, I'm going to the doctor.
I can't wait to go to the doctors.
I'm so excited to go to the doctors.
And yeah, everybody knew she was going to get her contact lenses.
Nah, I was a little too young to remember this first hand.
But my older sister, you know, was there the whole time.
And she was old enough to have remembered it first hand.
But it finally comes down to the day when my mom's going to take the train into Boston and get her contact lenses.
And she says, oh, it's today.
Today is the day I'm finally going to the doctors.
I'm so excited.
And my sister, who was one of the most gullible people in the world,
she says, mom, what are you going to the doctors for?
And my mom was just so beside herself that my sister didn't know what she was going to the doctors for.
That she decided this was a good time to make something up.
So she told her that she was going to get a boob job.
And my sister, I mean, she's got to be probably 16, 17 at the time.
She says, really long, you're getting a boob job.
My mom says, yeah, I really am.
And it took her a minute to convince her.
And finally, my sister says, mom, can I get one too?
And so my mom says, yeah, you can get one too.
So that's fine.
She says, but you have to do it the way I'm doing it.
And she says, what do you mean you have to do it?
I have to do what you're doing it.
She says, we know honey that we don't have a lot of money.
And it's not really something we can afford.
She says, so I'm doing the one at a time.
I'm going to go this day.
And I'll go back in a couple of months and I'll get the other one done.
So I might look a little funny for a while.
But that's okay.
So my mom, of course, goes and gets her contact lenses and is wearing them.
She's wearing these contact lenses for about a month and a half.
And my sister says, mom, whatever happened, why didn't you ever get your boob job?
And my mom says, I was pulling your leg honey.
You didn't know I was just teasing you.
And my sister about broke down.
Oh no, I told all my friends at school.
What are you doing?
How to make a repair around the house or something.
I'll call them up and ask them about something.
And I called them once and I was asking them about doing chips in plaster or something like that.
And he went on for a few minutes.
Wow.
Oh, another funny part about the whole my cousin and his girlfriend story is his brother has three kids.
And his brother is six months younger than I am.
So when he told his mom, he said, well, mom, you're going to have another grand kid on the way.
She was sitting there on the couch, jumps up, storms out of the room screaming, I'm going to kill your brother.
Then she gets mad.
She made a chaser down to go, no, no mom.
No, I'm having a kid.
Oh, man, my sister once told my mom that she was pregnant before she got married.
And she wasn't.
This was our family playing these jokes.
She had my mom in tears.
Tears of like sadness.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
She was totally distraught.
She was devastated.
This was like in the late 80s.
And my sister was still in high school and she had her totally convinced.
Oh, she has done high school.
Was that like punishment something?
What?
No, it was a joke, man.
Yeah, I mean, was she punishing your mother for like doing something mean?
I was going to say yes in the 80s.
That's how they punish teen girls.
They force them to get pregnant.
No, yeah, she's this.
I think seven is.
It actually won this one.
It was she was trying to get back at her from me.
See?
Family families in the US are just weird times.
I mean.
Oh, yeah.
Australian families like the poster children for normalcy.
Well, I was going to go there, all right?
Oh, man.
Jesus.
The whole joke conversation reminds me of one of my very favorite memories in my whole life.
It's when one of my sisters, I got four sisters, but when one of them graduated.
I'm sorry.
No, they're all great.
My dad was, he had a restaurant cleaning business at the time.
So he had a lot of connections all around.
And he had cleanness, really, really fancy restaurant.
And the guy told them, listen, come back any time.
I'll set you up.
No, we'll, we'll, we'll be your favorite.
We'll be great work, whatever, blah, blah.
So for my sister's high school graduation president, he took us out like it's a family like all of us.
Like me and my two brothers and my four sisters.
Mom would, you know, we're at this restaurant.
It's kind of this giant table.
And of course, my, my brother and I order lobsters because, you know, we're doing, and there's
we love lobsters.
And my oldest sister, it's just definitely afraid of them, revolted by them, made us sit on the other side of the table.
And, you know, we wouldn't even look at us when we're eating.
And, and my brother, he, he excuses himself.
He's like, I got to go to the, go to the bathroom.
So my mom, you know, sends them on his way.
Well, he had taken one of the lobsters' little claws, the, the, the, the, the, the, not the giant ones, but the little foot claws.
And he snuck it around to the other side of the table and he dropped it down the back of my sister's shirt.
And, and no joke, she screamed so loud that the violin music stopped playing.
And the people stopped talking.
And all we could do, all of us were laughing our asses off.
And she just slid and hid under the table.
That, that's almost as bad as the, the prank I played on my sister, um, we were in high school.
And I don't remember exactly what we were doing, but she had just started driving.
And we were going to the high school one night for something.
I don't know if it was for a concert or sporting event or what.
And the way the high school was laid out, they had like several different entrances, including several parking lots in that.
But some parking lots, they didn't allow you to park in at night for events.
So, as we're going into the school, and what they would do is when, when a parking lot was not,
they put a chain across it, like a big red sign on it.
Oh, I see where this is going.
So we're, we're pulling into the school and pulling into this parking lot.
And the first thing that pops into my mind is to yell, watch out for the chain!
And she slams on brakes and goes sliding into the parking lot.
And it's like, I basically gave her a heart attack.
You know, thinking that she was going to actually decapitate us with this chain that they would pull across the parking lot.
Oh, that's pretty good.
That's pretty good.
It reminds me that the driving one reminds me of a prank that my mom invented.
And this is the easiest and the best prank in the world.
And don't do this to your wife, I promise.
But she was driving down the road with my sister.
And she, you know, she checked all her mirrors.
There were no cars around.
She made sure of it.
But they're going along at a good clip, you know, 40, 45 miles an hour.
And just for no reason, all of a sudden out of the blue, she slams the brake,
throws her right arm across the front of my sister and, you know,
to hold her back into the seat, and just start screaming.
And you want to see someone in the passenger seat freak out.
Oh, the better one was one of the guys that at my last job actually,
you know, despite how much I hated my last job, I actually liked some of the people I worked with.
But one of the guys told me that he did his prank on his wife.
And he said, this is the worst thing he would never actually do it again.
Was one time they were going on a trip.
They were on the interstate.
And there was a car carrier.
Now, if anybody's seen these pickups that have car carriers,
typically the last car they load, they back onto the car carrier.
So it's facing you.
So you see the headlights and everything.
So what he did was he got into the lane with the car carrier.
He pulled up real close to it.
And he then his, you know, his wife was asleep in the passenger seat.
And he goes, oh my god, we're going to have an accident.
Oh my god, did you see this kind of rain in front of her?
She's like, she's heading towards now.
That's really good.
Damn boss.
I did the break check on to my wife one time because she had the hiccups.
And it was like painful.
She was really bothered by these hiccups.
So I did the break slam thing and threw my arm across her.
And she was mad at me all day long.
And she said, if that hadn't fixed the hiccups, we'd be divorced tomorrow.
Yeah.
I have a very great and simple prank to do to people.
If they're driving, and you're in the passenger seat,
this works in almost everybody.
It's kind of awesome like that.
Invisible great.
No, no, no, no. Here's what you do.
Sitting at a red light.
Wait a few minutes and just go green light.
And usually when you say that, they'll start to go.
And part of the brain goes, wait a minute.
So you can get someone to go right through the light though.
That's bad.
Yeah.
It could make sure there's no cause coming.
All right.
All right.
Let's turn this to geek jokes.
Oh, we know what we can do.
Here's a good one.
This is a self prank.
And it's a life hack too.
My wife's grandfather told me about this one.
He's a truck driver.
And he said, a lot of times, you just have to sleep in your truck.
You might fall into a rest stop or whatever.
And fall asleep in your truck.
And he said, but when you do that every time you have to take one shoe off before you fall asleep.
Because otherwise, when you wake up, if you have both your shoes on,
someone could have backed their truck up in front of you.
And you think you fall asleep driving and you wake up and you're two inches from another truck.
And you can scare yourself after death.
But if you've got that shoe off, it's just enough disassociation that it'll kind of ground you.
Shoot your pants.
Oh, that's crazy.
Oh, that's pretty good, actually.
Okay, so the geek joke, I have to blame my sister for this one.
Because she told me about it.
And I've never actually used this prank.
But I've seen what it does in action.
And it was possibly the funniest thing I'd ever heard or seen.
So at work, we had a new guy start.
And he quickly became friends with some of the other guys in our group.
Well, one of the guys was actually known as a practical Joker.
So he kept doing things to the new guy, like putting tape over the optic on the mouse.
So when the guy was trying to use his mouse, right, that's a standard one.
That's a good one.
So finally, the old guy isn't going to figure it out.
Yeah, well, it takes a few minutes to figure out what's going on.
So finally, the guy says, the new guy says to me, he's like, you know, I'm absolutely
going, you know, I've got a great joke.
I've never used it.
And I've been saving this one.
And finally, he says to me, look, he's played all these jokes on me.
He's like, just tell me what the new joke is so I can do something to get even with this guy.
So I finally tell him what it is.
And the joke is take a piece of Saran wrap, put it over the network cable.
End of your network cable.
Push it into plug network jack.
Now, this makes it look like you don't have network connectivity, right?
I think that's all hunky-dory dandy.
So you go ahead and replace the network cable.
Guess what?
You still don't have network connectivity.
Why?
Saran wrap specifically holds itself to things.
It doesn't actually stay on the cable.
It actually stays in the jack.
Unless you actually check inside the jack, you don't realize there's a piece of Saran wrap inside there.
That's actually screwing with your network connection.
Oh, that is awesome.
That is awesome.
So the guy does this.
And I swear to God, apparently, from what I heard, I wasn't actually there for the whole upshot of this,
but I heard from the guys.
They actually had three people over there trying to figure out what the frack was wrong with this guy's computer after this happened.
Because they could not figure out if you had a bad network heard.
If there was something bad with the motherboard on his system.
If there was something bad with the cable.
If there was something bad with what.
And finally, somebody actually looked in the jack and actually found the piece of Saran wrap stuck inside the jack.
I guess it took like two or three hours.
And then your friend was fired.
No, nobody was fired. Nobody was fired.
It was all, you know, it was a practical joke and escalation to a level that should never have actually happened.
Holy crap.
And the load came back on me because I never actually did it.
You know, I was told the story of how to do it.
Yeah, but here's how to get back at the guy who did it.
Is that you just, you know, you go to the water cooler once this is all done.
And you just mentioned to somebody that, hey, man, if you know who put that piece of Saran wrap in there.
Tell them to keep quiet because when the network dude pulled it out, it hooked on the pins.
And it bent and mangled all the pins in the network jack.
And now they need a new motherboard on the computer.
And they're looking to fire somebody.
Well, not the check in the motherboard due to on the check that it was actually in the drop side.
You'll either way.
Well, you know, you do the other way.
But they didn't in this case.
They actually did it on the drop side.
So it wasn't actually on the motherboard.
That's probably even what?
That's why you'll never see inside that jack on the wall.
Yeah, exactly.
That's actually why you do it that way.
God.
Yeah, but you're going to have a network guy there to diagnose that he's going to diagnose it pretty quickly
and replace a jack and same thing.
He just say, hey, man, they replaced a jack and maybe they're looking to fire somebody over this
because that wasted a lot of time.
You know, that's the one you get back at the water cooler.
Well, let's see the best part about this was, okay, so the guys were actually diagnosing this.
We're our second tier guys.
We were basically on the help desk at this point.
The guys who were trying to diagnose this were the second tier guys.
Almost all of them down the help desk.
All of them knew all of us on the help desk.
So they knew this was some kind of practical joke that was going on.
So it basically, it turned into one of the biggest laughs as ever.
You know, as far as it is.
Yeah, but now it's turned into a joke on them.
I just walk out and again, Frank let them fix it himself.
Well, but the thing was that they knew the guy had a copy basically.
I used to work with a guy who got pranked all the time.
This dude, he's like six foot four.
He's got like albino white hair.
But he's like, he's a big dude.
He would not want to mess with this guy.
And he went to work right out of high school at a car dealership.
And these guys at the car dealership used to prank him all the time.
And he, like they sent him into the dumpster one time.
They're like, oh man, we threw out a core.
Because when you take out, well, there's a lot of car parts.
When you take them out, you have to return the old part.
Because there's a core charge on it.
You get like a refund.
Like a deposit ball.
So what if you get a refund on it?
Or else they told him it was a warranty part because you got to save those
until the warranty inspector comes, you know, usually the ones a quarter.
But they were like, yeah, somebody threw a part in the dumpster.
We need you to go in there and get it out.
And they sent him climbing into the dumpster.
And then they threw cherry bombs in there when he was in there.
And he fell for this twice.
Oh my God.
That's actually, that's, you know, see that, that goes to cruelty.
That's not actually practical joke level.
That's just mean.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Where is he going?
One dude used to go and they used to do some all the time.
They used to do all kinds of stuff on it.
One dude said he was having a problem with the car's a parasitic drain.
Which means that something's drawn electricity when it shouldn't.
And, you know, the guy goes out in the morning to start his car and the car won't start.
Because the bad thing is.
And those things have sent us all to find.
Yeah, they are.
I mean, there's ways of doing it.
So what the guy says is, this is John.
Listen, I think, because I think I found this drain.
I think it's in the trunk light.
Because I think the trunk light is staying on when the trunk is closed.
So I need you to go in the trunk.
And I'm going to shut it.
Oh, yeah.
Okay.
All right.
In that trunk for six hours.
And the shop foreman.
You know, the manager in the shop.
He's coming to look for him.
Because this car is still stuck in this guy's bay.
Six hours later for a problem that is only going to pay an hour and a half.
So he comes looking for me.
Show John.
Where are you?
Where are you?
John.
And he hears him.
We're in the room.
We're in time.
Right?
So he threw the form and has to let this guy out of the trunk after six hours.
And then has to yell at him for not having the job done.
I am sorry.
I've got that all fall.
He said it broke his heart to have to yell.
Because I knew both guys.
He said it broke his heart to have to yell at the guy.
But he had to yell at him because it was his job.
All right.
Well, you go first and I'll go for you.
All right.
Well, back.
This is about six years ago.
I threw a house party, right?
I had quite a few of my friends there.
There was about 30 people in my house.
And you know how to every house party?
There's always at least one person.
You don't know.
Well, this one guy happened to be a person that nobody knew.
This guy walked in off the street, sat down in my living room, and passed out.
Like, no, I really said anything at first.
And finally I was like, does anyone know this guy?
And I was like, no.
I'm like, why?
Why did he just pass out in my living room?
What the shit?
You know?
So we tried to lift him up off the couch, and he wasn't going anywhere.
You know?
You know how like two-year-old kids do, and you try to pick him up, how they do that?
I call it the Jello Body Manoeuvre.
Or something.
They just go limp and you can't move him.
Well, this guy kind of did a drunk variant of that.
So I thought, you know, I know it'll get this guy out of my house.
So first, I grabbed a Q-tip.
Second, I grabbed a bottle of hot sauce.
I had someone hold his head.
I swobby inside of his nose.
He ran out, problem solved.
I would have sharpied him first.
Oh my god.
And it was habanero sauce?
I don't know your sauce.
Well, really mess with you.
Good.
Well, he shouldn't have showed up at some random person's house.
Drink, you know, their booze and passed out.
You didn't have any wasabi for his left nostril.
Oh no, we thought I meant both nostrils.
Yeah, that's what I mean.
The habanero and the right and wasabi in the left.
Okay, all right.
So going back to my work situation, I'm going to have to mention,
the guy who started this whole pranking thing with a new guy,
a little bit given first initials B.
At one point, I had actually tried to play a prank on B,
and it backfired.
It backfired like you wouldn't believe,
but with the best results ever.
Basically, B had a number of, quote,
service awards for working on the help desk.
And at one point when they rearranged our seating layout,
he was seated right next to me.
The only problem was that he and I didn't work the same shift.
So he was never there when I was there.
He got playing pranks of taking things and like hiding them on people.
So I decided it was time to get even with him for what he was doing to everybody else.
Somebody else had actually brought in one of those,
a can of nuts things that actually has a spring in the can.
So that is the same thing.
Yes, exactly.
So it shot us naked.
I love those.
Yes, exactly.
So what I did was I took all his awards and all his little decorations and stuff,
and I put them in one of the in the middle drawer of his desk.
And then I took the spring and I put it in the pencil tray,
put a ruler on top of it and closed the drawer for the ruler out.
So basically you have a wire spring loaded in his desk drawer.
When he opens that desk drawer, he's going to get hit with the spring.
So the next time I'm in the office and he's there,
he's going, what the fuck?
Somebody stole all my awards and stuff.
And I said to him, well, have you checked your all your desk drawers?
He literally went through the left side of his desk,
the right side of his desk and he said, they're not there.
They never touched the middle drawer.
I almost burst out laughing, but I managed to hold the poker face just enough that he never caught on.
So this actually did this way for like a couple of months.
I don't know how I managed not to actually tell him this,
that, you know, why don't you check your middle drawer.
But a couple months later, they decided they had basically had this project to upgrade all our PCs.
Well, they were doing that at night and I was actually working the night shift.
So I was sitting there one night when they came into our area to actually upgrade all our machines.
Now, the main guy who was actually in charge of this stuff was this big six foot guy,
really, really, really muscular, broad shoulder wrestler.
Okay, he was sitting in front of this guy's piece, Beeson, feuter, doing the upgrade on it,
and kind of leaning back in the chair and kind of, you know, playing around a little bit.
And he almost fell over.
And he almost fell over.
He grabbed for the desk and he grabbed the middle drawer.
And soon as he grabbed the middle drawer, spring went off,
and almost hit him in the face and almost knocked him all the way over.
Now, he gets pissed off about the whole thing.
He actually knew Bees.
He was actually fuming.
He was actually going to go beef the shit out of Bees because he thought Bees was playing a joke on him.
And in the meantime, this was my joke that I had actually planted like two months before.
And I actually had to calm him down and tell him that,
look, Bees had nothing to do with this.
This was actually my joke on Bees, but I actually just went off on him instead.
Does this story end with you getting the crap beaten out of you?
No, it does not because this guy was so focused on Bees.
As soon as I explained to him that it was actually supposed to be a joke on Bees,
that he actually got it.
Unfortunately, he did not pick out his violence tendencies on me.
In fact, he thought the whole thing was actually fucking hilarious
that Bees had never actually opened his drawer in two months and actually found this whole thing.
All right.
I got a good story.
But I'm so confident that it's a topper.
I'm going to let you guys go first.
And I want to hear about the most embarrassing thing you've ever done that you're willing to admit to.
Oh.
And I already think I can beat all three of you with this.
I live with 330.
I think the most embarrassing thing.
What?
I said, I used to live with 330.
Top of them.
Oh.
Okay.
I think probably the most embarrassing thing I've ever done was last week on KPO.
Which thing was that?
I am.
I laughed so hard at Peter 64 that some snot came out my nose.
Oh, man, that ain't nothing.
Come on.
That's the worst thing I've ever done from there.
And then the top.
He tried to do a Southern accent to which I actually sounded like a Southern bell.
Which he really did.
I like how he said that.
Oh, yeah.
Or it was just sounded so depressed that he remembered it.
I tried very hard to forget about that.
Okay.
So my single embarrassing moment that I will ever admit to was I actually got locked in a bus station.
Now, this is during college.
I was actually going back to school at one point.
This is damn near.
Bus pulls a tie of mine.
Bus pulls it to a bus.
No, this gets better.
Okay.
Bus pulls into a bus station.
And it's around lunchtime.
And I'm thinking, okay, it's around lunchtime, but I'm not really hungry or anything.
But at some point, I said I had to go into the bathroom.
So I go into the restroom.
I'm doing my thing in there.
Somebody steps inside the door and turns off the light.
And I yell, hey, there's somebody still in here.
And I hear nothing.
So I finish my duty and basically find my way through things
and end up going outside into the bus station.
And the whole thing is completely freaking empty.
I'm like, what the frack is going on here?
Frack with...
Okay.
And no C, right?
No.
All right.
What the fuck is going on here?
Okay.
So, but anyway, I'm stuck inside this thing.
The freaking phone starts ringing.
And I've got no idea what the hell to do with the phone.
I have no idea how to answer the phones.
Anything.
So I just go and sit down in one of the passenger seating areas
when all of a sudden a taxi cab pulls up
and they've got somebody who wants to get out
and go to the bus station.
I see them and I get up and go to the door where I'm locked in.
And I yell to the person, I said,
I'm locked in the station.
I can't get out.
So they didn't just...
And I can't remember if it was a sheet or a key,
but here she turns and explains to the cab driver
that I'm actually locked in the station.
So the cab driver radios back to the station
that there is somebody who was actually locked inside the bus station.
Now this being a Sunday,
and there being nobody really around,
the person at the dispatch center
pulls ahead and relays this message to the police.
But in so doing,
broadcast it publicly to all the cabs
and all the police cars in the area.
So the next thing we've got is,
we've got about five to ten cabs
driving down by the bus station
to see this idiot who's locked in the fucking bus station.
And the cab cars show up,
trying to figure out what the hell I'm doing.
Did I break in or what's going on?
And we've got the manager of the bus station
showing up about another 20 minutes after that.
Go ahead and open the door
so the police could actually question me.
Yes.
Okay.
That's my most fucking embarrassing story ever.
Okay.
I love it.
Poe, how does that do?
Can you actually top that?
I can top that.
And it's...
Our stories are remarkably similar.
But I can put the icing on this cake.
So I was about 16 years old.
I was working at a car dealership after school
as a, like, they call me a lot boy.
So you go around, you move the cars around,
you put them where they're supposed to be,
you wash them,
especially if you know some of these coming in to look at it or something.
And, you know, that was my job there.
On Fridays, on weekdays,
including Fridays,
the dealership closed at five o'clock.
And when I say close, I mean close.
They shut down.
They locked up five o'clock.
Everyone was out the door.
Nobody stayed a minute longer.
It was...
We were done.
On Saturdays,
the dealership closed at four o'clock.
So I mixed up days one time.
And it was, of course, Saturday.
And I looked at the clock in its quarter of four.
And I said, oh, I got plenty of time to go in the bathroom here
and do my business.
And I would have actually had enough time
to go in there and do my business,
except where I went in the bathroom in the shop
where, on the top of the toilet tank,
they had about a two foot stack of porno magazines.
Would you get me in the bathroom?
Just a little while past four o'clock.
No, but he's going to hold that again.
again. Yeah, I don't even know what time it was. Sometime after four, obviously. But
the smile on your face. Well, no, I wasn't doing that. I would just look at the pictures,
but I come out of the bathroom and I noticed that the bay door at the end of the shop
is shut. And I go, oh my God, today is Saturday and I'm locked in here. And I know as soon
as I come out of the bathroom and turn the corner, the motion sensors are going to pick
me up. All the alarms are going to go off. And I still get to get out of the building.
And I was without a license at the time. And I knew my ride would have come and gone too.
So now I got to, you know, just wait before cell phones, but I got to take a, you know,
walk two towns over to where I live. So me and Sherry and I, as soon as I came around
that corner, the alarms went off, the police had to come down. I was able to let myself
out because you know, you got big bay doors. You just hit the button to open them and hit
the button to close and again, and walk out. But man, having to try to explain that to
the police and explain why I was in the bathroom for well over 15 minutes without repealing
the piano. I could see the police, the police got, got there in the time it took you
to get to a bay door and get out. No, actually, I was walking up the road. And I saw the police.
Oh, no, they busted you up to it already got out. Yeah, yeah, I got out. But the alarm
was shit. And I don't know. I saw the police coming up. They saw the police far coming
with lights on. I knew where they were going. So I flagged the woman down. Yeah, I had
to tell her it was because I didn't want to hide over it. You know, if they ever discovered
it was really me. So I had to just admit to it upfront. But yeah, the, yeah, I guess.
And somebody had to come back to the shop. He like had to come back and his vacation
he was on his way like on vacation already. He had to come back to the shop and reset
the alarms and everything. It was pretty bad. And trying to just hide the fact that it
was for no matter what. Well, you know, okay. So the only thing about your story that
doesn't beat mine is that with mine, I had to endure the parade of shame of all the
taxi cabs in town coming down and driving past the place. Look at the idiot who was actually
locked in the frickin bus station. I mean, there must be 20 cabs. And they, it was being
a Sunday. They had nothing else better to do than a drive past the bus station. Yeah,
but you were locked in there through no fault of your own. That was, you know, that's
the difference between yours and mine. Mine was totally my fault. I screwed that up.
Poké, sorry. I can have a very small turn to be worse than you. It's just the slightest
change in the turn of events and his would have been way worse than you. I was going to
say, I guess at this point, Poké and I have kind of tied each other around. I have a good
story of public humiliation. Well, I was going to say, I mean, Pegwell, you've actually
been detained by customs twice. So I was going to tell you about that. Both of us.
The short version of this is going from Detroit to Canada. What I had to do and no one else
had to do this, which is bullshit. He's even still bitter about it. Yes, yes, I am. What
I had to do was since I was wearing really baggy shorts is, well, and the guy's own words
is give yourself a fucking wedgie. It gets better. It gets better. It wouldn't just
in the back wedgie. It wouldn't just in the back wedgie. It was hike your pants up as
far as you can and give yourself a wedgie wedgie. I would have told him, no sir, you can just
feel them. Yeah, you can go get yourself fucked. And I had to do this at the crossing place
there. Oh, yeah, you really can't mess around with border guards. No, no, you cannot, especially
when they're carrying AR 15s, but the best part was there's about 40 to 50 people watching
this plus construction workers on the other side of the street. Yeah, it wasn't good times.
I bet that dude was picked on a lot in high school. He looks like a walrus.
Was the customs going into Canadian or American coming out? It was going into Canada coming
back out. It was a lot easier. You didn't wear baggy pants. Like you would think that going
into Canada wouldn't be much of an issue. You think, you know, coming back into the states
would be, but it was actually easier getting into America than out of. Yeah, I've only been
to Canada once and I had the exact opposite experience. It was harder getting back into the
states. You put on a citizen, dude. Yeah. Yeah, I was with a citizen. So you're not a citizen
yourself. No, but I didn't get our time. We got the hard time. There was all the popping
the trunk and why is your passport wet and all this shit? Why was your passport wet? Why
is there a poker in the trunk? I'm gonna be honest with you. If I'm a border guard
and an American citizen is trying to smuggle you across the border, yeah, I'm stopping
me. I have an Australian passport. Yeah, I still try to smuggle you. Fuck. If I fucking
boarding passes, my flight is bullshit. Okay, see, all right. So my weird story that
was fairly recent in like last two weeks was now, by the way, I have, oh my god, now
I want to tell a story like this before the statute of limitations is up. Yeah, actually,
because this one's okay. This one doesn't, this one doesn't even approach that at all,
because actually the coolest bar in the world has aired in here. We're gonna figure this
out. So the coolest bar in the world has opened up here called Beer Cade and what it is,
it's an arcade and a bar and they actually have a lot of the old video games like Pac-Man,
Street Fighter, Chowst, you name it. They've got like 20, I think they have like, the
next owners of Five Lays are gonna renome it short circuit. Well, so they, I mean, it's
like the coolest bar. I think they have like 30 or 35 games, but they only have 20 on
the floor at a time. But anyway, well, and on top of it, the owners of this bar are
really, really cool in that they always have at least 20 micro brews on tap. So you're
always in a really good place where you can have really good beer and actually play classic
vintage video games. Now, when I was there a week or two ago, I was going up to get some
beers and I was standing next to this girl who was actually really cute and apparently
she had seen me several times throughout the night and she turns to me and says, you
know, you look just like Newman from Seinfeld. What? I'm sitting here going, now, I'm like
totally forward by this because I look nothing like a guy who plays Newman from Seinfeld except
that I'm a little bit heavier. But facially, you know, overall hair features, absolutely nothing.
But she's standing right next to me at the bar where we're both getting ready to order. And all I
could think to say to her was, well, thank you. Thank you. Because primarily because A, she thought
I looked like somebody who was on TV that for some reason she had some admiration for B,
she was drunk and C, she was really cute. And then I find out what she was playing.
What else do you say to that? Well, but then here, here was the problem where we was hoping
fell apart. I was thinking, you know, hey, maybe I can actually strike up a conversation with her
after I get my order in and that. Then I found out she was closing out her tab and leaving.
So there, shot that out the door. So, you know, I was kind of embarrassing, but, you know,
at least I got compared to somebody who was actually known for doing something.
I can tell you, you're better on that end of it because I was on the other end of a similar
comment once and I still feel bad about it. When I was, I don't know, four or five years old,
you know, two young to know the difference, you know, and two young to know any better,
I asked one of my sister's friends and I quote, are you pregnant or are you just fat?
Oh, well, you see, one thing is there. The thing is there. You were so young that you could
be forgiven for that one. Doesn't matter. She cried for about four years.
Okay. Well, she was not fat. She was a little, little, little chubby baby, but
no, but she called that new man. That guy's a freaking dough. Dude, I'm like 300 pounds. So, you know,
I can't, I can't forget, you know, I can't get pissed off somebody for confusing one
overweight person with another, you know. Right. I won some, my grandmother was wearing some
unflattering clothes one time when I was young and I greeted her at the door and I was like,
man, do you look like a balloon that's been inflated a little too much?
And then afterwards, I had a little sit down with my grandfather and he told me that there's a
ways that men speak to women and it doesn't involve comparing them to overinflated balloons.
Well, it was a good life lesson.
That's a very appropriate response to that. I got to give it to your cramp up for that.
Yeah, I know. I know. He could have been like you a little bastard and beat the crap out of me.
Well, kid, there's appropriate ways to talk to women and then there's what you did.
Yeah. One time I was walking with my sister again, very, very young and we were walking by a bunch
of people sitting on a porch so they all heard me say it and I, I don't know where it came from
to this day. I don't know what made me ask her, but I guess we were just walking,
you know, probably holding the hands even because I was so young and she's, you know,
with 10 years older than me and I looked up her there and I said, Jenny, what's a lesbian?
Excellent question, man. Excellent, Christ.
Yeah, all right. She, because I remember her pulling me by the hand after that up the street
as quick as she could. Okay. So back when I was living down in Georgia, down in the south,
I was actually on a dating website and I struck up a conversation with this one gal.
What's her name? Pegwall? No, her name was Pegwall or Peggy or I'm a pretty lady.
I got a couple of stories out of this site. So there's a couple of good ones here.
The one I'm thinking of right off though is it's one girl who she night exchange a couple of emails
and it's getting to the point where I said, hey, you know, it'd be cool to actually meet you
and she was like, okay, but the only thing is that I've actually been talking with this other guy
who actually I think is a better person, you know, for me to meet. Well, and partly the reason
she said that she thought this other person was better to, for her to meet was that he was taller
than me. You know, I just got really irritated by that because, you know, I'm like five, nine or so,
five, eight, five, nine, something like that. I'm not really short necessarily. And I think she's
like a couple of shorter than me already. So I just came out with a rotor in this email and I said
to her, so what is it? Is there like a sign outside your bedroom door? This is, you must be this tall
to ride this ride. I never used that one. I never used that one. I never used that one.
Well, actually, you know, I think about that was a friend of mine actually suggested something along
that line to me and I said, you know, the amusement park ride thing and stuff we talked about
that actually fit. So I have to use that one. And I think that was for the best because in the end,
the fact that she was turning down meeting me over this other guy because of height of all things
was just the biggest fucking insult in the world. You know, yeah, superficial. You don't need it.
Exactly. Exactly. It was so fucking superficial and so insulting that it was worth it to insult
the shit out of her or that. Now, the other story that comes out of the same website is this girl
that I did actually meet, which I swear to God, the first time we met turned into the strangest
eight I've ever been on. Primarily because it turned into a verbal like Tom and Jerry cartoon.
Like in Top Strange Date Stories 2, I've dated Peg-Wall. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
You cannot beat this shit. You cannot beat this shit. Okay. Here's what happened.
She and I met and we got along pretty well. We actually had dinner. Then we went to a show. Then
we ended up sitting in her car, almost having this like weird-esque debate for like three fucking
I'm saying you're going what the fuck is going on here? Why is this like why am I being grilled about all
sorts of weird shit? Wait, are you wait sound chaser argumentative with a stranger? I don't know if I can believe this story
Yeah, but this wasn't about anything that I'm normally argumentative about
Okay, this is about like general stuff. I
Then came to find out later like a few days later that
The parent name was grand. No, but I could have been a twin for her ex-husband
Okay, so she thought she thought that I had been put up to going on a date with her by one of her ex-husband's friends
Trying to screw with her
Okay, so she had actually gone ahead and gone's kind of verbal offensive with me
Thinking that I was trying to fuck with her
Wow, that's bizarre. That's quite awesome. That is so bizarre. I could not ever imagine having anybody else ever be in that kind of a situation
And have no fucking clue what's going on
And by the way, and the only reason I actually believe this whole thing is because she then showed me pictures of her ex-husband
And the the resembles between her ex-husband and me
Is astonishing. It is actually there
Uncanny
Yeah, if if I hadn't actually seen pictures of her ex-husband
I would not have believed that story
Top that motherfuckers
Thanks for listening everybody. You've been enjoying me uh dev random podcasts
We all love you
And we are gonna be kicked off HPR after this episode
Oh, yes
All thanks to sound chaser
My goal of life is to fuck with everybody
I think we can probably break
That that that that that we can probably blame crayon because he didn't bother to show up
Well, I figure maybe like at the canonical story if you just clip out everything between that and thanks for listening
It's
It's funny. It's true
Sadly, I will probably just release it as it is and hope for the best
You've been listening to uh, I'm Dan Washkella. Thanks for listening
I'm Link Fesadon
I'm Peter 64
And Brian with a Y. Sick of Night
Oh, that's pretty bad
But that that that takes us to a whole new low
I think we started out pretty much as low as you can get
No, no, no any time you don't love her. I was gonna say any time you start bringing in uh
Shoot up her broadcasting and those assholes you've gone lower
Look we started out and they talking about merkins, okay
We we can't be lower
ah
Well, we don't know wait we did actually get lower than that peggy because we talked about your hairy feet
I'm not even granded to deny it his hobbit feet
The dev random podcast if you don't hate us after three hours you're hired
Oh very nice
Thank you for just doing the next promo
Third promo today dude
What the fuck do you mean the next promo? We've had a promo
Yes, yes, we have if you listen to tilts you'd hear it
Really
I know when I tell some stories on kp
Which isn't really a promo because
No, it was on tells a thing I believe it was yeah, you said it was gonna be on tilts
But I keep missing the live broadcast of tilts and and I have not said at my
pod catcher yet, so
Yeah, I have no tilt lately more than reported
Yeah, I know that's the thing. It's hard to listen to tilts if you can't yell at them in the chat room
I thought about that because I never think about listening to the live versions of any podcast because I'm always in the wrong time
I never really thought about what it would be like to be actually sort of like abuse
People that do a podcast in the IRC channel
We don't actually do anyone that's not that's not even true
But being able to interact with the people who actually are doing a podcast is actually a really cool thing
Oh, yes, if you match yourself, but it's awesome. Yeah, no, but yeah, I don't actually match it up for you
But you know, we go back to this whole music thing and stuff you haven't heard
Um possibly the bug cast might be recorded a time that you could actually check out
Yeah, I was on tilts one time and people in the chat room were like helping me out
It would like reminding me of stuff like if I was trying to make a point or something
It was really cool if you could manage to read chat while you're talking and listening which is top
Yeah, so so people who didn't catch this me and E and I know caught this
aviates actually showed up in a gas planet while we were doing this
And I actually as soon as I saw that he was there
I actually asked him if he wanted to join us for a few minutes and see you know just to get him on here
And he um, unfortunately, he wanted no part of it. Can you blame him?
In case you don't know I don't blame him at all
But you shut your mouth. Yeah
I think any chance to actually get paid on a podcast would actually improve the quality of the show
At least incrementally over what we're doing now
So you know, I thought hey, I'll take a chance and try to get him on here and
Unfortunately, he declined
Yeah, sadly, I think I see better is worse in this case
Yeah, unfortunately sound chaser. I think it's true that four bad apples ruin a bunch
We've already got four bad apples, so we're adding a fifth wouldn't have been a problem
Right and the four of us would have ruined the bunch that was made up by the four of us plus aviates
Good apple
It's you know, no see I think I think the one bad apple or the one
Good apple in this case would have actually improved the quality of the four of us overall
Kidding me. I couldn't help. How could they?
Because he's deep deep, but if you've probably made it was
Yeah, no because he's deep. Yeah, because he because he podcasted at 60 miles an hour
I mean, you know, he's the only person that you pull that shit off
He could expect some of your stories. Don't forget. He has a fog machine in his car
Yeah, but does it run on dry ice or fake cigarettes?
I'll have to ask him
Yeah, Dave is a legend by the way, you're right about that. Yeah, so I mean, I need to
He can't get him on for like five minutes even would have been I think a great improvement
But you know, he turned us down anyway, so we're stuck with who we are
Dave if you're listening good choice
I forgot where the hell I was going with this whole thing now
He gives me we've read hold the whole thing pretty well
Yeah, I just signing up where I might not have joined us either
I don't know if I'm gonna blame you for that either. I thought I was coming in here to talk with Peter 64 and crayon
I had no idea it was gonna be used
You're pretty much eight feet of 64 and crayon is pig well in it. Yeah
I'm everywhere and sound chaser tossing for good measure
You know, I don't see it. It's pretty much. It is
So does that make sound chaser um unix red house
Oh god
Oh god, it doesn't make sense because
That does make sense because sound chaser does like to interrupt people
Oh, we've all interrupt that. It's not even fair
No, that's not fair
Yeah, you know, it's not fair
You're talking shit about deviates e and for the record. I love
Peggy's gonna hold this against me forever
He didn't come on the podcast
We're allowed to make fun and verbally abuse people who did not come on the podcast when invited
I don't actually I think I think they didn't come on so they they've trumped us
Well, they get to make fun of us
Yeah, you guys have to understand the whole reason that this show actually started
Was that we actually wanted to make fun of zombie circus
The zombie circus only had one episode when we decided we were gonna make fun of them
So it's kind of like what the fuck are we doing? This is like really super fucking meta making fun of a show
It's only had one episode
You know, we were like no you decided to make fun of zombie circus
No, no, no, it was me and Crayonx both Crayon and I started digging on people who had been on on
zombie circus
All right, listen we just recorded the HPR monthly roundup show today
Me and Kenneth several of the people and and Ken brought up making dev random a regular slot on HPR
And I can guarantee you this is not gonna happen now
It's gonna take a lot of heavy editing to make that good
Yeah
This show's gonna go from like three hours to 10 minutes three hours fucking four hours at this point
Try to make your your cuts hilariously obvious bagel
You gotta do what cuts all right now before before anything finishes or anything like that
I've been saving up this question for like three hours because sound chase it keeps fucking interrupting me
Um good night everybody
me
No, I just said it because it can text your least sensitive
So I gone upside
I wanted to
Wanted to know what you hated so much about your last job my last job um, okay
Ah
My last
Yeah, where to begin is right i mean
Yeah, seriously, it was one of those situations first off
They never see I calling the eye human since day one. No, the IT
The IT group because of the management over it had no backbone
They actually cow-towed to every other group inside the company
Oh, yeah, and that led to that led to policies like we had to do patching
We could only do it on the weekends once a quarter starting at midnight
Oh
Okay, so we would actually have to go in like a Friday or like a Saturday night at midnight and
Patch until 8 a.m. in the morning
Then we'd be able to go ahead and go home go to bed or whatever and we had to be back
at work Monday morning seven or eight o'clock in the morning. Okay, I
Personally was in a group or in an area that I actually had to work
Somewhere around midnight or 1 or 2 a.m. Until three or 4 a.m.
Several nights a week several nights a week and I got no flex time out of it
So these guys go unpatched for three months at a time
That's not unusual. What's the name of this place?
Who do you mean this? No, I'm not bringing up any names. Okay, it's not unusual
It's not unusual because all right. We don't we don't need to be in like a quarterly patching cycle
It's not unusual to do it's not usual to do a quarterly patching cycle. Okay, that's not unusual at all
For like Oracle maybe
Well, no, no for Red Hat too. Oh
Okay, Red Hat does
Okay, just the first
Okay, so you know, all right
He'll tell us after the podcast
I'm gonna lead all line right now. I'm a little out of line right now. No, I'm not online because you've been drinking. Yeah, fuck it
I'm not going back to this
You might go to court and damn please note this is
I'm not going to court with a memory because I've been out I've been away from there for over a year and a half also a good black
material
I suppose this is not streaming
I never bring up the name of the company and my real name is not associated with this
Okay, so there is a reasonable amount of anonymity here that I don't have to really be too concerned about it
That doesn't seem like laying it out on the table for me. No, but the practices of the company itself are enough that I don't have to worry about it
You know what I'm saying is I don't have to worry about laying out their practices and and their bullshit and
Actually being concerned about it to come back on me because they won't have enough to trace it back to me
Another thing about this was that there was an extreme
issue in terms of who got promoted who didn't get promoted who got what position who got left behind for things
I was kind of stuck in the shadow of a guy who was listed as a system engineer who was designing a system who
um
Basically couldn't design his way out of a fucking paper sack if it was on fire
Okay, the guy he put together a whole
system by which
All the servers were actually set up as virtual servers and yet there was actually no
overhead or no room to actually go ahead and migrate a virtual from one server to another
Between hypervisors. So when we went to patch that system
We actually had to take all the fucking hypervisors down completely all the VMs down to actually patch them
Understand on top of this. Well the worst part about this was I got fucking stuck at a point where when we went to patch all his shit
The shit wouldn't come back up because the kernel was fucked up enough that it wouldn't load all the drivers correctly
When I called him to try to help and actually figure out what the fuck was wrong with this stuff
He basically refused at six o'clock in the fucking morning
After I had been up since midnight the fucking night before trying to patch his shit and bring it back up
This is ridiculous. This is like I like my last job
I hated my last job and I figured you and I were gonna be like sort of in similar boats
This is fucking ridiculous. Yeah, you know, this is to the point
That's why I fucking hated this job, right?
And I've got several guys that I work with there. I have huge fucking respect for there is one guy
It was been in IT and it was worked on Unix and Linux systems for on the order of 40 years now
I learned more from him in working there for one year that I learned the last five to six years working in my previous job
Okay, that guy walks on water
I want to steal him away from there. The problem is it's so close to retirement. He doesn't want to do it. He didn't care
Two other guys I worked with it. I would want to steal away from there
One of them left and has moved to Texas. Poke your own messed up. Yeah, Poke can't really hear you
So I'm gonna finish what I'm saying the other guy the other guy that I worked with I have actually tried to bring on board
Where I'm working now
Unfortunately, he has enough education and certification experience that he he has priced himself out of
Working for the contract company that I'm at. So unfortunately, he just can't make it into there
But I keep trying every single time I see anything that I think he could actually
Apply for and get the hell out of that company. I keep trying and this guy has actually talked to both Google and Red Hat
And they have both been interested in him, but unfortunately, things have just not worked out
So yeah, definitely the prime previous employer
They're they are so fucking full of shit. It's not even funny
And in fact, by the way on top of all this when after I had gone through all this bullshit of trying to patchy systems and
having to stay up till
eight or nine o'clock in the morning from midnight night before I
Not getting any support or any help from the person who actually designed these systems and was actually really
Responsible for the issues that I was running into
By the way, I got to my ass got chewed out from that whole thing because I had asked him to look at some stuff
And he said he would then he went back to bed and basically left me hanging
But then when I talked to my manager about that and said look
You're not even paying me a reasonable rate to actually expect that I am going to pull a
24-hour shift or anything like that. I
Got nothing back. I got no feedback from a that was even fucking reasonable. Oh
Feedback from a boss that seems unlikely. Well, not only that, but see on top of that that particular fucking manager
What he has done is he is actually realigned himself
We can be part of a big project team and he has left his
Group the direct reports that report to him. He has left them fucking hanging
Okay, basically don't have a manager now because he's actually realigned himself and he took the people that were his favorites out of that group
And pulled them along with him into a project
Okay, now
The other flip side of this whole thing is that this guy was actually part of another company that was acquired by
The company that I was at so he is the side of it. He needs to work his way up the chain and
Fuck everybody else is under him and
Can't put up with that bullshit. That was one of the big reasons I left
Okay, I think I think I'm done with all the bright sunshine and stuff about my previous job
So who wants to end it?
Ha ha
Well, you've been listening to the Dev random podcast with ethyr. Oh
I'm sorry
Bye everybody and Poke I told you I'm Dan wash go
And this is sound chaser who is completely anonymous now that I've actually laid out all the bullshit about my previous job
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